A lot can happen in 2 weeks

I'm slowly emerging from the dark depths of my bout of ...well, I'm gonna call it my 'mean reds' as Holly Golightly would say. I believe in the mind being the best way to heal your own body but when your mind gets lost, you have to work harder to fix that wiring. We all know I don't ask for help, so when those mean reds kick in, all energy is concentrated on repairing my mind and all else gets pushed aside.

But over the past 2 weeks I have gone back to me. Back to focusing my thoughts on improvement. Instead of trying to figure out 'how can I change my life' I'm figuring out how to change my brain. Basically, I need to balance my hormones.

My life is what it is. My life will become what I 'need' it to be as I remember that it is MY life. If losing these 40 extra pounds I have is what comes to mind when I think about how life has changed from when I was most happy to now, then I need to do that. And I need to be serious about it, not just in a way that I say 'oh, well I'll cut out pizza for a month and not have any booze and all the things that I enjoy are now out of my life'...that is not how my brain works and that will surely not make me 'happy'.
I have started the 131Method again in order to reduce all the inflammation in my body and balance my hormones so my brain gets straight.
I've been going for 10 days and I can already feel everything shifting. Where I used to come home after work every day with an overwhelming feeling of dread and despair, and wishing we had not gotten the new puppy...now, I come home eager to watch him run around and play ball in the yard.
Where I would buy a bottle of wine almost daily and crack it open the moment I got home from work, I've had 2 glasses of wine over 10 days, and that was on an evening out to see a friend's band.
My hands that I could barely make fists with because of puffy joints are now feeling 80% better. Still a little stiff but not like I'm wearing water-filled gloves all the time.

I joined the roller derby 'fresh meat' training. Just to get out and skate once a week (since the closest roller rink is an hour away, minimum), not to re-join derby (I KNOW that would not honor my mental well-being!).

I put a puzzle together...which helped in two ways.
One: it gave me something to concentrate on, instead of my imagined dread of living.
Two: it made me separate myself from Orbit for a bit. It started my habit of an hour of alone time each day, to not worry about leaving the dog upstairs.

I made new toys for Orbit. Toys I thought could handle his rough play. Fleece is a wonder!!

He can't seem to chew through it or rip it as easily as other fabrics. I made him this braided tug toy, another one with a tennis ball wrapped inside, and I wrapped one of his old toys that he put a hole in (so it's the same old toy but the hole is covered and he can still play with it!)
I also finally got around to the snuffle mat.

It's great to hide treats in, to keep him busy while we eat, but once the treats are gone it becomes a frustrating empty treat dispenser and he starts barking at it and tossing it around. So we have to keep it in the hall closet...which means we forget it exists and almost never use it.

I have been trying some dog treat recipes so I can bake without the urge to eat baked goods all day.

Orbit is getting more snuggly as he gets older. He will be a year old on May 20. The biting is now the only real issue...though we still have to work on him jumping on people.

I got together with my sisters and aunt on Easter Sunday, so I put together little gifts for the girls. A simple tin filled with a small notebook, a pen and a small candle, topped with a little birds nest clip.

Aunt put together little clay pots filled with candy and a little personalized gift for each of us girls, as well.
We chatted, played games, laughed A LOT, ate A LOT and just had a nice day of cavorting.

The weather has been nice (not raining and nearing 60 degrees) for a couple days. I'm home from work today and hoping to get out to the car. Unfortunately, Hubs got bit pretty bad by the neighbors dog last night, in an attempt to keep Orbit from being attacked, so his right arm is swollen, painful and has a pretty deep wound...which is keeping him home today. It seems like every time I'm ready to pull the trigger and get back at the car project, I'm thrown for a loop. I will not let it deter me today though! There are other options than me using this as an excuse again.

Happy Wednesday to you all...I hope you're doing the best to honor your selves!