Assertiveness and its learning in children
Assertive people can express what they think and also what they feel. When speaking of assertive communication is to be clear and honest, to be assertive is to maintain respect without offending, but it can not be confused, saying: "No", with being discourteous.
Assertiveness allows for tranquility, which allows you to express what you like and what you do not like, communicating it respectfully, clarifying the limits, without violating the limits that are known by each person.
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Assertiveness seeks to assert rights without annoying the other person, in a pleasant way and without violence. Although it may seem simple, it really is not, because you must know how to say "NO", asserting the rights. Another way of being assertive involves body language, as there are aggressive and submissive people.
The aggressive, usually do the following:
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They invade the space of the other.
- They speak loud and loud.
- They look aggressively.
- They impose their rights, without any explanation.
- They move away, without saying anything to avoid, in a timid way.
- In general, they speak in a very low voice, to avoid an unpleasant reaction.
- He only knows how to say "YES" to everything, he does not know how to say "NO".
- The feeling of the person.
- What they think.
- What is expected of the other person.
- Toothpicks.
- Balloons.
The submissive, usually do the following:
It is important to teach and make children understand that to learn to be assertive, you must have an "egalitarian" relationship. That is, to accept how one implies the acceptance of the other, but without allowing oneself to be imposed; what involves talking, solving, negotiating, establishing adequate distances without invading the spaces.
When assertiveness is instilled, it is done because it is a key and fundamental element in the child's development, since it has the opportunity to be assertive and generate energy in actions that really benefit them and others. Also, it is an advantage in life, since you have the opportunity to channel energies.
Teach children, the tips for assertive communication (From teacher to student)
It is necessary to make the child pay attention to the explanation, in order to be able to approach them and understand how to be assertive.
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Be at the same level as the child, for example: look into the eyes, if the child wants to talk while sitting, the teacher also and if you want to stand, the same position is adopted.
The tone of voice is important. Example: if instructions are given, choose three clear and concise rules for retention. Even something that helps, is to anticipate the children to any eventuality.
Teaching children to communicate is essential, it is not enough just to be able to talk, it is essential to be able to survive.
Managing the assertive expression of children around emotions.
Children learn by agreement, by trial and error, and this is where several situations are presented to get things.
For example:
If as children, as a result of being spoiled, they decide to obtain things, that will be the defense mechanism. Which means that they believe that this behavior is functional in their lives, but it is not.
That is why trying to make children form in a more calm and open to the expression of their emotions, can bring a series of consequences to say it somehow, healthier adults.
The way to treat children when they throw tantrums, to be assertive, is then, instead of punishing them, the idea is to approach them and regenerate the awareness that we are understanding, and that anger is perfectly understood.
Then let him express it, so he does not hurt himself or others. In this way, he is allowed to feel, and a resource to help him is to write the feeling, therefore, the educator must provide the student with knowledge of this tool to drain and it will be the healthiest.
Educate with assertive language.
To educate with an assertive language, it is necessary to be communicative and transparent, since language is the map of emotions and transmits, feelings, phobias, complexes and, unlike this, quite the opposite, a language in which the child learns his scope action.
Three aspects that children assimilate to express must be considered:
Understand that each action has a consequence, and that some actions are allowed and others are not; Assertiveness plays an important role for correct determination.
It must be remembered that children, at a considerable age, know how to reinvent themselves, which means that they want to decide and know, that they are independent of the rest of the people. He knows what the meaning of property is.
Activity to learn to be assertive.
This activity allows mutual empathy to work, realizing how they handle their relationships and acting on their backgrounds, being able to realize how assertive they are.
Materials to be used to carry out the activity:
The educator will give the children a toothpick and a balloon for each one. Each child should proceed to inflate and knot the balloon. It consists of keeping the balloon inflated for 60 seconds, and thus the person who wins.
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It's about exploiting the peer's balloon, but each student will prevent that from happening, it's part of the assertiveness.
The role of assertiveness is based on winning with the balloon, during the 60 seconds, and if everyone stays with the "balloon" inflated, everyone can win, unlike whoever has exploited it.
It is not about winning the classmate, but that everyone wins.
http://carmenl.vornix.blog/2018/08/12/assertiveness-and-its-learning-in-children/
