A Trip to Guatemala
The following, let's call it adventure, happened to me around 1996, I was at that time working on a container tracking system for the company I worked for and they were starting to implement this program in Puerto Barrios in Guatemala and I was being sent every few months to check up on how it was working.
I was usually sent on the company airplane but this time the plane was in Costa Rica so I had to go overland. Now to get to Barrios you either took the roundabout route crossing most of Honduras and the eastern part of Guatemala, about 600 Kms.and since I can't drive that meant going by bus, there was an alternate route though via the north coast of Honduras about 350 Kms, but there was a part close to the border where there was no road, you had to get to a place called Tegucigalpita and board what was basically a canoe with an outboard motor and navigate on a small stream no more than 25 feet wide.
There were parts of the stream that were only about a foot deep so the boatman and his helper would get out and one would push and the other one pull in order to get out of there. All around there were only cattle ranches, at one moment I saw a cow running and I saw a fer-de-lance close behind, that really woke me up. Well after about 45 minutes we got to a part that was no longer a stream but man made canals, I have no idea why they were built. Eventually we got to a pier and a path took us to a small store on a low hill, no idea why that store was there I saw no signs of anybody else living around there. Anyway we had a hot soda there and then walked downhill to wait for the Guatemalan boat. It arrived about an hour later, it was a larger boat with a much bigger motor and shortly we were on the Motagua river which is a big river.
We were landed in the middle of banana farms that belonged to Chiquita, there was a car there waiting for me and it got me to Barrios in about 25 minutes. This was on a Tuesday I stayed supervising the program until Saturday morning after that I was free as I wasn't travelling back until Monday.
So I decided around noon on Saturday to take a few beers. There was restaurant right on the seaside by the pier which was actually three 40' containers piled on top of each other, there were stairs and it was actually kind of nice. So I was there drinking a Dorada when this lady showed up and asked me what vessel I worked on, I told her I wasn't a sailor and she told me I certainly was because she knew Poles when she saw one. I think she was kind of dumb because I don't think a Polish sailor would speak Spanish without an accent as I do.
By this time it was getting late so I went to the business part of town, now Barrios is the axis of a very rich agricultural area and the workers come to Barrios on Saturday to get drunk and I mean drunk, I entered a Chinese restaurant and there were a lot of men in there just drinking rum, when they passed out the owner just grabbed them and threw them out on the street where they just remained passed out.
Well after that I learned there was a night club called Marinos so I went there. There were 36 girls who danced naked on the platform, these girls where from El Salvador, Honduras, Nicaragua and even one girl from Costa Rica they work there to raise money to continue on their trip to the USA. I liked the ambient and I watched each show the girls presented drinking a lot of Gallo beer , I left there real drunk around 03:00 am.
Well I woke up around 8:30 with a real bad hangover, so I went back to the business center and all I found was a lot of guys, I mean dozens, still passed out on the streets, so I decided to go to Santo Tomas de Castilla where the government port facilities are as I had been told it was nicer than Barrios for having a good time. So I hailed a taxi (they charged 2 Quetzales then) I noticed the trunk was full of boxes with what seemed to be merchandise, the front seat was occupied so I got in the back seat. As i tried to get comfortable I felt somebody was looking at me so I looked to my left and there was this lady there, probably around 55 or 60 years old a native Mayan I think, she had tresses in her hair and a lot of white strands.
I looked at her and out of nowhere she told me- You are going with me to Peten, I like you and you are going to be my husband. Now that was really something plus I had that terrible hangover and then she started crying because she realized I was too young. By this time I was really freaked out and I told the driver to let me out. He pulled over and as I was going to pay him the lady said, no man of mine pays for anything I will pay his fare. (Thinking about it I could have done good with this woman). Well I got out ready to run if she also got out, but no the taxi left.
So I managed to get back to the center of Barrios, all nervous and thinking about where I could go because I wasn't sure I wouldn't meet that lady again, I was told there was a football game that afternoon so I went to the stadium, no woman from El Peten is going to a stadium. Once the game was over I bought some chicken at Campero the local fast food chain and went to hole up in my hotel.
That night I decided I was going to come back the roundabout way so at 6:00 am on Monday I took a bus to Chiquimula from there to Esquipulas and about 1:30 pm I was in Ocotepeque, Honduras. I took a bus from there to San Pedro Sula it left around 2:30 so I got to SPS around 7:15 pm too late to catch the bus to La Ceiba so I had to stay at a hotel. I hadn't eaten all day and from the hotel window I saw a Chinese restaurant (looks like I was being followed by these Chinese restaurants). Now I hadn't eaten all day so I figured that that was a good place to eat because they always serve a lot of food. I ordered a Chow Mein because I like noodles but you know they gave me so much I couldn't finish it despite the fact that I was ravenous.
Well the next day I took a bus to La Ceiba and arrived safely home, still kind of weary that that lady hadn't followed me.