My first post about how to talk to anyone.

in #amazing6 years ago (edited)

One of the biggest life skills in the world is how u deal with people how u are able to have a conversation with absolutely anyone even if u met them for the first time irrespective of who they are, and it's one of those life skills that they don't teach you in schools, so god bless my blog.
And as with any life skill, I feel this can also be broken down into a few easy points, a few easy tips and that's what we gonna be going over today, so getting to the first point, you need to understand what people are drawn to, remember human beings are hard-wired to be drawn to people who radiate positivity.
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1- So the first step in having a conversation with absolutely anyone is making them feel a little bit comfortable and creating a certain level of trust in that person, now one of the hacks to create a certain level of trust is always holding a slide smile on your face, u go into any party, u go into any situation, u kind of need avoid the "resting bitch face".

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So resting bitch face is where people in any situation they will always have a kind of frown on there face like even if they are walking on the road they will walk with the frown. That frown unknowingly gives out a bad image of that person. People start pursuing you a someone that they cannot trust entirely and that's the first thing you need to avoid, in any party u go to always hold a bit of a smile on your face it draws people towards you. So once people have been drown towards you what's the next step
And this is where the next two points coming now body language is something that is a very very underrated skill in the world and body language is also something u can almost manipulate people with, remember the whole point of this blog isn't about manipulating people, it's about making people more comfortable and having the internal ability to converse with absolutely anyone and body language is a huge factor in gaining someones trust, so body language is broken down into two parts, bad body language what u wanna avoid and good body language, so the essence of bad body language is having closed body language.
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Suppose if u are talking with someone and u curved your hands all folded up that's one is the first sign of being closed human being or your hands are always in your pockets that's what makes the other person trusts u a little bit lesser, it kinds of gives the other person an impression that you are hiding something, so that's what you wanna entirely avoid which brings me to my good body language point.

3-Good body language - when we are talking about good body language obviously the first point is open body language,
so how do u convey open body language?

The first step is that you need to use your hands a little while you are conversing with someone.

(1)-When you use your hands to talk it basically gives the other person an impression that you are confident with what you're talking about and confidence has a one to one relation with being trustworthy and that's what you have to try and create.

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(2)- when you are talking to someone u should expose your palms and deliver your points, this is an internal human thing, humans are hard-wired to trust someone whose palms they can see, it gives us an impression that this person is open and is not hiding anything it is the exact opposite of having the closed body language and hiding your palms.

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3- coming to the next point, now that your body language is covered how do you carry the conversation forward.

  • remember one way to carry any conversation is that you need to have a grip on it, you need to be dominating that conversation and to dominate that conversation you need to kind of give the conversation direction and one way to give the direction is to constantly ask questions to the person, so suppose a person is talking about any topic, suppose a talking about football match one way to carry the conversation forward is to ask questions about that football match, if you ask questions about what the other person is talking about the other person gets this impression that you're listening to them properly and you are interested in what they are saying, so they go okay, this person is interested in what I'm saying, so I can trust him and they keep talking and that's how the level of trust just builds up a little bit. So even if are not into the conversation this is how you can let people think that you are into it and you kind of set that impression when people are interacting with you and then they go home, they're gonna be remember, " so, that guy was cool he was listening to he was into my conversation and we basically just bonded well.

Okay, I'm coming to the fifth and final point, which I personally feel is the most important aspect of having a conversation with someone.

4- when you go into any conversation especially with a stranger you cannot go in with the intention to judge someone. What you've got to understand is that everyone has their own stories, so irrespective of what they're telling you, you can't judge them for things, remember it's your job in a conversation with a stranger to just catch whatever they're saying keep it inside you and start judging people based on the sentences they are throwing at you it kind of brings your own comfort levels down in, and the process of bringing your own comfort levels down you're also bringing your own happiness down, you might think that, the other person person doesn't know that you are judging them but a lot of times the people who are judged know that they're being judged and they take away a bad experience from that situation, so remember the final point is that whenever you're going into a conversation with someone be completely open-minded have the ability inside you to accept whatever that whatever that person is saying when you have that absolute zero level of judgement or judgey ness inside you, people are going to remember you for that and when we're talking about people skills it's all bout building these relationships, remember people are going to forget everything you. Said to them everything you've done to them but people will never forget how you have made them feel, and if you're able to have a conversation with someone where you make them feel like you're a good person and you mean no harm to them, when you're not judging them for anything people take that away from you and your network builds, remember even when u are talking about something like business more than your own skills it's about how you network with people and a big part of netowrking is not just going into the conversations with the intention to do business or to make contacts, it's about making the other person feel like they mean something to you.

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