BEASTLY TALES

WHAT’S IN A NAME?

Over time I have noticed, in a manner most brash,
The surnames of T.V. commentators as they daily do trash,
Those in public life, living in public domain,
In the spotlight, so to speak, pursuing much fame.
These surnames, many suggest combative notions,
Smack of violence, pugilistic motions,
Here is a sampling, of interest to note,
They’re all different, but in the same boat.
Bash, Dent, Schmack, Drub and Bump,
Schlapp, Punch, Crunch, Mash and Thump,
Each of these words has a connotation of violent behaviour,
The recipient of which, would look for a saviour.
Of intimidation by threat, of course,
Of unlawful exercise of physical force.
Antagonism against an opponent, adversary.
Active opposition, not bred in a nursery.

So, there you have it, in black and white,
People whose names do conjure up a fight,
A battle, a skirmish a fisticuff bout,
Usually the province of an undisciplined lout!
Now, what if T.V. commentators had really nice names?
Had really soft, luvvy-duvvy, sugar and spice names?
Would it soften their daily critical commentary?
Perhaps it would purge and make it less “vomitary”!
Names such as Sugar-Plum, Kiss-kiss, and Lovey-Dove too,
Hug, Caress, Pat, Pet to name but a few.
Yes, it should tone down their invective position,
Like receiving curative pills from a physician!
A softer approach to current affairs and news,
And analysts could well tone down their views.
Even Politics could take on a softer approach.
The average politician resembling a smelly cock-roach.
No telling what difference a softer appellation could make.
If only so much of the news was not already fake!