BEASTLY TALES - THE LOAN SHARK

in #art5 years ago

Welcome to Beastly Tales. Each has a message, a moral. All are meant to have an element of humour. Naturally, any names included do not depict real folk but are included as part of the joke.

All rights reserved.
(As with Beastly Banter Beastly Tales is written and illustrated by Richard Hersel.)

Thank you for your following.
Richard Hersel


BEASTLY TALES

THE LOAN SHARK

Conrad Clutterbuck borrowed a thousand quid,
Yes, foolishly from a loan shark, he did.
The loan shark, sitting in his van,
Had a minder who carried the can.
Or, if you prefer, the bag of money,
And as required, strong-armed any bunny,
Unable to meet repayments usurious terms,
Yes, those defaulting sluggerdly worms,
Conrad was told, in a manner quite clear,
That any default on repayment would cost him dear.
“Consequences,” was the term applied,
And what they might be were clearly implied.
“A broken leg, or a shattered Knee cap,”
“Or some other kind of horrendous mis-hap!”
“Its far better to know in advance,”
“Especially if you liked to dance.”

Now, Conrad needed the thousand quid,
To start a small business, yes he did.
He was going to open, a take-away diner,
Couldn’t think of anything much finer,
That the twinkle of cash register bells,
As people were attracted by delectable smells.
Given off as food he cooked with culinary prowess,
Success was all he could think and could guess.
In reality his cooking was really lousy,
The associated aromas smelt very mousy,
And so, predictably, his business was not a success,
In actual fact, it was a downright mess!

The loan shark came by the following month,
We’re awaiting your repayment, all we’ve had is bumf.
“Consequences, we warned, for loan non compliance,”
“So were severe consequences for open defiance,”
“So unless you don’t care if you’re able to dance,”
“We are going to give you just one more chance.”
“We’ll be back this time next week,”
“And we’ll expect the money we do seek.”

The business had folded, He had no collateral,
All he felt like was screaming a caterwaul.
Conrad went that night to his club,
To bend a friend’s ear about his drub.
The friend, who had some knowledge of law,
Said, “By the sound of it this loan shark you saw,”
“Is probably not licensed under the appropriate Act,”
“This being so, you can probably have him sacked.”
“That is to say, legally he can’t take things further,”
“Physical consequences are another matter. Their fer-vour,”
“For such consequences would probably mean,”
“You should leave this area, no longer to be seen!”

the loan shark.png

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shark_birchAQUARIUM.jpg sharks at la jolla Scripps aquarium @angrytwin

Nicely illustrated. Do you create your art with a graphic tablet? Would be great to see your impression on my art. :)

Posted using Partiko Android

Very funny! I love the artwork, awesome!

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