No? No Barry? That’s #funny. I had a tough time listening to those first 48 seconds, the chorus sounded like a good idea in my head and then I pushed play—it wasn’t so good anymore. I considering poop-canning the whole idea but as soon as the chorus hit and Barry did his thing, I laughed out loud, it was settled—I’m going with it! 👍🏿 I’ll play a #victory lap song at the end of this victory lap post that’s a little more my style.

Third and final answer:

Because that’s Hoffa king hot it is here you guys—it’s miserable! We had no idea. It’s sofa king hot here, Pura Vida and I have altered all future #travel plans to a two week maximum stay, rather than 30 days, to any sight unseen location. Just a few weeks ago we had air movement, beaches and, prior to that, a house so high in the mountains it didn’t need air conditioning. However, this particular part of Costa Rica, in Golfito Bay, none of the above. It’s so hot here you’ll have enough time to write up seven lengthy articles and post one each day of the week because you literally can’t go outside—you just can’t!

Looks can be deceiving:

This is the view from the front balcony on any given day, the Air B&B ad featured similar images, this is what we saw—it looks peaceful, right? Waterfront, blue skies, calm water, peaceful:

But this is what it really looks like. This is how we see the front balcony—from the inside looking out. This is a view of the balcony from the dining room closed glass door with the air conditioning set at 23 Celsius, one oscillating fan on maximum speed and three ceiling fans that are spinning so fast, they’re hard to talk over, the first few days Pura Vida was worried they were going to fly off the ceiling:

It’s so hot here you sweat in the shower. You don’t need a hot water valve, they’re both hot, everything is hot. You sweat taking a shower and every day is a two shower minimum, the most I’ve taken is four.

Water front property, true, but there isn’t a coast line—it’s a port for ocean liners and commercial fishing boats. There isn’t any beaches, you can’t access the water if there was, the waters edge is met by mud and swamp, just a few days ago, less than 50 yards out, we spotted two crocodiles lurking in the water. That’s the only time I’ve ever used “lurking” in a sentence.

It’s so hot here, 38 C with humidity so heavy you can taste it, your days revolve around shower planning. One before the grocery store, then another shower after because you’ll sweat so much inside the market, your elbows and ankles will drip. You’ll sweat so much carrying grocery bags from the street to the apartment, you’ll need a free hand to keep the sweat out of your eye.

Eh, it’s so hot here, check this out, fact: The gym here is open from 6am til 10am, closes all day and reopens from 6pm til 10pm, those are the working hours. I asked the guy “is it because of the heat?” He pointed outside and said “muy caliente!”

We were offered a boat tour yesterday from our host, “we’re going to take the dogs across the bay and let them run around,” she said “you’re welcome to join us if you’d like.” Pura Vida and I looked at each other and pretty much answered, “thanks but no frikkin way—not today, not ever!” Our hosts boyfriend asked me the other day “so, what have you guys done since you’ve been here, do you plan on doing any exploring in Golfito?” I told him “counted down the days. We tried peddling our bicycles the day we got here, got about 20 yards from the house, turned around and locked the bikes back up, took a shower—they’ve been there since, now we just avoid going outside.” 10 more days—tomorrow will be nine...

But it’s a great place to get in some #steemit time—that’s for sure! You’ll have so much time, posting once a day is possible. No consistent WiFi, though, that makes things difficult, it means learning the GoPro is a NoGo from this location. Can’t draw either—no table and no light. Pura Vida and I have our own edges of the couch we alternate to avoid direct sunlight. She has her phone charger and I have mine—we’re equipped with devices, dominoes and cribbage. We have plenty of #food, too, she’s a gangster chef and the roof seems to hold up fine during heavy downpours—rain so heavy, the raindrops look like they hurt:

We have everything we need, we’re #blessed, I’m the luckiest guy I know. Everything I need is watching cooking videos and taking notes or listening to Yelawolf’s new album on the other side of the couch. Thanks for keeping up with me this week. Here’s that video I told you about in the beginning, the one I said is a little more my style. This is Victory Lap by Rittz, I recommend earbuds as loud as your device goes: