Love & marriage 179 - DIVORCE - THE EFFECTS ON YOUR CHILDREN
Divorce can have devastating effects on children and on the family.
It brings a massive change in the life of the children no matter what their age. To see how your parents lose their love for each other, adjusting going back and forth between two households and the daily absence of one parent all create a lot of uncertainty and new family circumstances.
https://cdn.pixabay.com/photo/2017/05/17/15/02/divorce-2321087_1280
In the personal history of the boy or girl, parental divorce is a watershed event. The life that follows is significantly changed from how life was before.
Carl E Pickhardt Ph.D.
Although the young child, ages 1 - 9 years and the adolescent ages 10-19 responds very differently when their parent"s divorce. The effects that divorce has on these children or adolescents are also very different.
Let's look at the table below: (Table my own)
Parents who divorce's priorities should be the well-being of your children.
The security and predictability should be restored. The children's trust should be restored in the security, familiarity and dependency of the parents. This is done by reassurance, routines and rituals.
https://image.freepik.com/free-photo/mother-consoling-sad-teenager
Parents should establish household and visitation routines as soon as possible and keep to it.
This will help the children to know what to expect from now on. Allow your children to create rituals so that they feel more in control of their lives. The parent should continuously reassure the children that they are still as much loved as before and that both parents are still committed to the children. Both parents should work hard on making the new family arrangement work.
https://za.pinterest.com/pin/140526450845406294/
Thank you for reading.
Source: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/201112/the-impact-divorce-young-children-and-adolescents
Images: as indicated under each image.
Children need both because both have decided to bring that child to this life and the separation of parents can break the life of children and it's literally brings disaster in their life and we saw many examples where after separation children moved into depression, or took wrong steps and path in life, this is because children will learn from parents and parents are the real reflection of this world and if parents throw the negativity then for sure children will not walk towards the positivity. So it's really important for parents to take all decision carefully because it will not effect just them. Thanks for sharing this post with us and wishing you an great day. Stay blessed. 🙂
Thank you for your meaningful reply @chireerocks. God bless!
Welcome and thank you so much. 🙂
In many ways seeing family bonds destroyed by divorce I think to sum it up "divorce is worse than death". Very destructive, but also necessary in some cases, rather divorce than live in a continual war-zone of parent fighting.
Another great insightful article thanks @hope777
Thank you for your always meaningful comments @joanstewart. You just gave me another topic to research. Stay together or divorce?
My parents divorced when I was 5. I still remember their fights. Mom remarried and divorced 4 more times while I was a kid. I am thankful for what God has done in my life and I know much of it is because of the pain I experienced as a child. But until the day my dad died (back in 2008) I harbored this secret desire that mom and dad would get back together.
So sad! Most kids from divorced homes always have this expectation that their divorced parents would come together again. They hardly accept the reality and it creates great pain in their hearts. May God help us to make the most of our marriages
That is terribly sad @mackmck. Thank you so much for sharing. As you said, thank God for what he has done in your life.
Divorce changes the perception of the kids in such union about marriage, love and commitment. Divorce is so bad that it can alter the life and destiny of a child till such a child leaves the earth. If parents understand the effects divorce has on their kids, they would learn to work on their relationship and not engage in acts that will jeopardize their marriage. Your posts are always enriched with useful information.
I agree @resuscitate and that is why I do the Love & marriage blogs. If people are better equipped to handle problems that can come in a marriage then they can work on it. My 2nd hubby (first one died) got divorced and as I listened to what went wrong in his marriage, they just did not have any knowledge of how to handle problems and differences and they never sought any help. So the marriage just went more downhill to the point where it was unbearable for them to live like that and in my stepchildren, both teenagers at the time I saw all the signs that I mentioned in my post and I also suffered because of that because all of their anger was directed at me, the new stepmom.
Is really nice what you're doing. Only if young couples will have the desire to read and learn, they'll be saving themselves and their kids from the ills of a broken marriage. Do you own a website or you share your information just on steemit?
Thank you @resuscitate, no I only share on steemit. Maybe I should start a website, I am waiting for an uncapped internet connection. Maybe when I get that I will consider making my own website. God bless!
Theirs no way one parents can g8ve the love of both father and mother . Its one thing don't get married or else don-t get divorced specially after having childrens.
Thank you for expressing your viewpoint @punkblogs I agree. Blessings for the week!
thanks and wish you the same @hope777
It is so easy to get divorced nowadays. It happens left, right and centre. Very sad society we live in. A marraige needs work...
Thank you for reading and commenting @bernardtjames. Blessings for the weekend!
Well, in the olden days a divorced mother and her three children were either avoided, or treated very badly. Especially if there was no ex husband ever around and the abusers knew that the single woman and her children were unprotected. Money was scarce and the little boy had to play with other children behind their mother's backs as the children were not allowed to play with the little boy! Into adulthood and the divorced women's 3 children faced severe issues to conform to ordinary life! Yes! Divorce certainly deliver serious issues for the children! Thank you for talking about this Lady @hope777. Blessings and upvoted!
Thank you so much for your in-depth reply and encouragement! I really appreciate it, just wish more couples will read my blogs.
Sneaky Ninja Attack! You have just been defended with a 2.92% upvote!
I was summoned by @hope777. I have done their bidding and now I will vanish...
woosh
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