Student Of Life

in #comedy5 years ago

Life is crazy and as time goes on, you learn. I'm not talking about school, I'm talking about hard lessons that you can only learn from experience, stumbling into or epiphanies. No school can teach any of those.

I've been doing research and its been an arduous journey, I'm still learning about women and what they really want from men. It's been a long old futile search but here's what I found out so far;

  1. When they get older, they'll settle for just about anything so if you're ugly and can't get a girl, don't sweat it. There's an old lady for you.
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  2. Women won't want your money from the start, they want your life and your soul. Your wallet and balls will be firmly in their control after getting the earlier two

  3. Porn has taught me that no one multitasks better than a housewife. A hoysewife can give blowjobs to two big black gardeners while talking to her husband on the phone and getting ploughed by the third gardener. His name is José.

  4. You wish you could remain single but deep down, you want a woman in your life. You will swear you don't need her to complete you, yet you feel incomplete without her. That's what they do to a lot of us.

Conclusion: its pretty straight forward really, women are super sweet, scary, bloodsucking, heartwarming, murderous, loving, annoying and all things in between.
I'll leave you with a poem from my heartmine

Loving the right woman is like castration of the mind
You literally feel your balls leaving, one at a time
You feel your senses leaving but think you're fine
But she blows you and says to you "those balls are mine"__Belemo

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