The Ultimate Guide To Shitposting - Comedy Open Mic Round # [25]

palikari123 (64)in #comedyopenmic • 6 years ago (edited)

It’s been a few months since I wrote the first part of this planned shitpost trilogy, and a couple of months since I wrote part two. So I guess it’s time to wrap up with the final part and ‘The Ultimate Shitpost’.

Part one which was a tutorial on how to create a shitpost based on the overuse of block quoting on block quoting techniques, had a lot of potential and a bit of a cult following at the time, without reaching the lofty heights that were promised;) It was however appreciated by the cheetah bot who even gave me an upvote!

Part two was a shitpost explaining the definition of the word ‘shit’ from an official dictionary perspective, while also trolling you the reader, by cloning itself into two parts and requiring you to read the same shitpost twice! Well, lets’ just say it was a miserable failure at the time, and I was so depressed that I even fell ill and suffered from constipation for a while. Even my own shit was so disappointed that it went into hiding!

So to end this trilogy in shitposting, we will try and create the ultimate shitpost by incorporating aspects from parts one and two, as well as exploring what the official definition/meaning of the term shitposting is, from an internets trollers perspective (myself that is).

Here is the definition as specified by the Wikipedia page on shitposting:

Shitposting is posting large amounts of content of "aggressively, ironically, and trollishly poor quality" to an online forum or social network, in some cases intended to derail discussions or otherwise make the site unusable to its regular visitors. Shitposting is also used as a colloquial term to denote any kind of unproductive posting to an Internet forum or chat, such as sharing memes.

Well to that I say fuck you, Wikipedia…you simply have no sense of humour or trolling capability yourselves, so you just trash a perfectly fine method of spreading joy.

Here is another short explanation of the term shitposting, from knowyourmeme.com who I feel may be somewhat more qualified to give a true definition of shitposting! They are experts at memes right?

"Shitposting" is an Internet slang term describing a range of user misbehaviors and rhetoric on forums and message boards that are intended to derail a conversation off-topic, including thread jacking, circlejerking and non-commercial spamming. On 4chan, the byproduct of shitposting is referred to as cancer.

Wtf, my intro to that block quote was longer than the definition itself. Now that’s a true shitpost definition of shitposting! I’m so proud of myself right there:) I also much prefer this definition to the previous one!

And last but not least, we go to the ever reliable Urban Dictionary, where all internet trolling shitposters go to get the ultimate guide and multiple definitions of their favourite words:

The constant posting of mildly amusing but usually unfunny memes, videos or other pictures that are completely random or unrelated to any discussions.

Did you see the video of that old disgusting guy in drag dancing around? Yes. Fucking Greg is shit posting again.

An ironic art form of expressive yet apathetic funposting practiced only on s4s, the philosophical meme factory board on 4 CHAN.

I spent hours a few hours today drawing wew lad naked, now I'm going to spend the next 3 days shitposting about it.

The failure to make a constructive post

The inability to add useful information to a forum

Worthless overly offensive generally racists posts written in a manner which aggravates others.

Commonly known as unconstructive or unnecessary posts.

Recently known as #dotnet_discord-net in the Discord API guild. A channel that once was a learning and knowledge foundation for the unofficial (dot)net wrapper for Discord API. Now has become the home of shitty memes, and overcompensating star posts.

When you post on Internet forums and don't give a shit what you're saying. In general, being a bad person.

When you subscribe to a million different shitposting 'motivational/meme/bad joke' websites and re-share each post on your own Facebook feed.

One who posts on social media, especially Facebook, every thought, occurrence, or incident that typically happens during one's normal day.

One who spends more time posting thoughts or events that occur their life, than actually spending time experiencing their life.

Isn’t this fantastic? Not only have we managed to learn the true definition and meaning of the term shitposting from an internet trolling perspective, but we have also managed to revisit and use our previously learned techniques of block quoting skills. Right on!

All we need to add into the mix now, is some shitpost art…This way I can invite the readers to help me announce the winner of the Golden Turd Award! It’s the ultimate award in shitposting and is held in high esteem amongst elitist shitposters. So here we go!

Turd at the Museum

The Ultimate Guide To Shitposting - Comedy Open Mic Round # [25]

Here is the definition as specified by the Wikipedia page on shitposting:

Here is another short explanation of the term shitposting, from knowyourmeme.com who I feel may be somewhat more qualified to give a true definition of shitposting! They are experts at memes right?

And last but not least, we go to the ever reliable Urban Dictionary, where all internet trolling shitposters go to get the ultimate guide and multiple definitions of their favourite words:

Here is the definition as specified by the Wikipedia page on shitposting:

Here is another short explanation of the term shitposting, from knowyourmeme.com who I feel may be somewhat more qualified to give a true definition of shitposting! They are experts at memes right?

And last but not least, we go to the ever reliable Urban Dictionary, where all internet trolling shitposters go to get the ultimate guide and multiple definitions of their favourite words:

Judges:

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