I bought a ten dollar mountain bike. And it's tried to kill me twice.

So I've been on the hunt for a cheap bike for a while now so I can ride with the kids on weekends (and attempting to get some of my fleeting fitness back) only I didn't expect to find one for just ten bucks..

What could possibly be wrong with a ten dollar mountain bike?

Er...where's my list?

In no particular order:
Surface rust. There was a fair bit of sanding and filing to get the metal from rust brown to pretty dull silver.
Two flat wheels
The front brakes missed the wheel by miles
The rear brakes hugged them like a child with a teddy bear
The chain had locked up
The front wheel was out of alignment

Still I do enjoy the occasional challenge and 45 minutes later after dousing the entire thing in Inox lubricating spray, grinding away at the surface rust, tightening what needed to be tighted and loosening what needed to be loosened - I had a bike that looked like it wouldn't try to kill me.

WHAT IS THIS THING?

A Dunlop mountain bike. Yes the same brand who make volley shoes and car tyres. This was a budget bike way back when and weighs roughly three tonnes. It's like a recycled bank tank with gears slapped on. For someone like me who hasn't had a bike for the last 13 years, it's ideal.

Of course when I did go for a ride the entire gear system choked when an fused link in the chain refused to bend and that almost put me into the nearest fence. Back in the garage the offending link got a drowning in more Inox and a work over with a pair of plyers until it started behaving.

Right, back to the test ride. Where I found the nut on one side of the back wheel wasn't tight enough causing the wheel to angle and become one with the rear brakes causing them to be active the entire ride home. You can just imagine how amazing I looked trying to pedal two blocks home with the back wheel not shifting in the slightest .

Did I manage to buy a bike with a curse?

Thankfully after a week I can report that everything is back to normal - wheels turn, brakes operate as normal, I haven't crashed into anything (yet). For now, my ten dollar mountain bike is the bargain of the year.