Disappointed Moment 失望时刻

As there are disappointed moments in life, it is vital to learn to deal with the unexpected disappointment. Certainly, the disappointed moments are what we hope to avoid in life. Nevertheless, should anyone come across such moment, there are a few steps to deal with it.

First, try to calm down oneself whenever an emotion is activated by a negative event. To calm down oneself does not mean denying one’s feeling, but rather to attempt to cool down before making a decisive action. For example, someone has been disappointed by another person, and the tendency is to react to that person. However, it is better just to feel disappointed and do not react immediately. While acknowledging one’s feeling, he or she can try to keep quiet and think reflectively prior to responding.

Secondly, when the person has managed to calm down, then the person has to assess his or her interpretation of that event which has caused the disappointment. Sometimes, a negative emotion is due to wrong belief or misinterpretation of the event. A seemingly negative event can be a blessing in disguise. For example, someone is disappointed for not getting a desired job. It is indeed disappointed, and the person may feel defeated or useless. However, such belief can be wrong. The reality is that the person can try again. And with better preparation, although the person did not get the first job, the second job may be more ideal.

Thirdly, having changed one’s belief or interpretation of the event, then the person can explore a decisive action which is relevant to the situation. In the end, the disappointed moment may turn out to be a blessing in disguise.

由于生活中会面臨失望，所以必须学会应对那样的时刻。当然，我们希望能避免生活中所有的失望时刻。如果遇到如此情况，有几个步骤可以处理它。

首先，每当我们的情绪受到负面事件影响时，要试着先让自己平静下来。冷静下来并不意味着否定自己的感受，而是在做出决定性行动之前能够保持客观。例如有人被另一个人造成了失望情绪，自然的会倾向对那个人有所反应。然而，最好是可以不立刻做出反应，而是要在承认心中失望的同时，在回应前先保持安静及思考。

其次，当自己冷静下来了，透过思考以评估该事件及导致失望的原因。有时，负面情绪是由于对面臨的事情有错误的信念或理解。其实看似负面的事件可能是化装的祝福。例如有人因为没有得到理想的工作而感到失望，什至感到失败或无用。然而这种信念可能是错误的，因为他或者应该再试一次。并且在自己有了更好的准备，虽然没有得到第一份工作，但第二份工作可能对他更加理想。

第三，在改变了对事情的信念或理解之后，他才采取符合实际情况的行动。透过上述三个步骤，本来失望的时刻却可能形成化装的祝福。