Priscilla Hernandez: NOTHING ( A Ghost Lullaby): Song, videoclip and reflections about sorrow

in #dsound6 years ago (edited)


Nothing.jpg

This is one of my saddest songs... "Nothing" and also a very simple video I made filmed in several cemeteries in very different locations (Canary Islands, UK, Catalonia...).

The void and emptiness in the heart of a ghost that seeks to feel again. She watches us as we rejoice with the pleasures of life, not being able to feel anymore that thrill and warmth. She feels like nothing but still cannot help hurting herself, observing and yearning for what she won’t have anymore. She is attracted by the pulsing force of the living. But this song is also about loneliness, it's about longing... for some it could be happiness, for others someone that is lost, or something that is missing... it is different for everybody...
But somehow the longing detaches and becomes a presence almost a sentient one...

(c)Music and Lyrics by Priscilla Hernandez. Inside the post there is also the music video


► Listen on DSound
► Listen from source (IPFS)

Watch the videoclip

The video ends with a nameless stone... a name forgotten
It was never engraved on that stone

in memory of - by priscilla Hernandez (yidneth.com).jpg

In loving memory inscription.. without a name

Moth or butterfly? Both

I have a fascination for moths... as beautiful as butterflies but often dismissed as their wing colours are more muted, the kingdom is the night, away from vibrant daylight. I am both, that's why all my music is dual... light and shadow. But in many occasions I am more the moth than the butterfly. I include them often in my art, and in fact in my next illustrated music album Fear no More expect many, because Yidneth is a moth whisperer. Many posts (art, cosplay, other videos) related posts will come when the time comes.

Because you know “moths fly to light, when they’re blind in delight

Moth in lamp - by priscilla Hernandez (yidneth.com).jpg

Nothing (Lyrics / Poem)

There, if you're there
you may be out there
Oh There may be a way
Please, be back to me!
I wish, I wish I could die right now
cos I cannot feel anything at all
I wish, I wish I could die right now
lay my back and rest
now i sink so deep
and I would sell my soul
if you're back
Oh I am nothing
nothing but grief
nothing you care about
Oh there is nothing
nothing but ghosts
nothing but aching thoughts
Oh I am nothing
now that I am nothing for you
Nothing
nothing you miss
nothing but silence
nothing but me
and there is nothing
nothing but void
nothing but anger
and my lost hopes
and there is nothing left
now that I am nothing for you
Oh I am nothing
Now that I am nothing for you
but you know...
moths fly to light
when they're blind in delight
But you don't know...
...I feel like nothing... nothing

 - by priscilla Hernandez (yidneth.com).jpg

Illustration I made for this song

This is an illustration made with water colour (entirely traditional) mimicking one of the secenes in the video. So it is kind of self-portrait and It was included in the album Ancient Shadows which in fact has two booklets. The Ghost (for the sad or dark songs) to which this song and drawing belongs, and The Fairy (more uplifting and inspired by fairy tales)

Nothing by Priscilla Hernandez - by priscilla Hernandez (yidneth.com).jpg

Have you ever felt this way?

grave - by priscilla Hernandez (yidneth.com).jpg

Translucent, incorporeous, incorporeal, intangible, untouchable... protected... invisible

safe

I may say that I am overall a rather cheerful person most of the time, rather naive and muppet-like, in fact some friends nicknamed me "The Fraggle Princess" (in honour to the Fraggle Rock), but I know lots about sorrow too... It is a very deep emotion that sometimes can resonate with a beautiful meaning. There is no need to tear apart... we are white and black, lights and shadows. And you would not appreciate one without the other.

Sometimes I've dwelt in this place... It's a dark place, but that kind of darkness can be sometimes comforting... Light seems sometimes hurting and even blinding and in the shades we can feel safe and concealed. And it takes bravery to cloak yourself with it, to become a shadow. I know all about it, as if I were one of my Underliving creations. But there we can see things not being seen. We become quiet observers, we can fly and hover... invisible. But you can't stay there for too long, because when darkness start to numb your feelings you may become a ghost. Then we react and we remember there is a way in... so there is always a way out. And we wake. I have several songs that were composed for my forthcoming CD that are very much related to this one "The Longing", "Lurking from within" and my favourite "Even my ghost would pass me by" and I hope I can release the new album so you can see how these three songs match each other perfectly. How these idea of becoming an astral invisible entity and maybe getting lost there is always subtly included in my compositions as part of my own soul experiences. But "Nothing" is the oldest of them and when I am sad I always return to it. And then get over it... It still sometimes makes me shed a tear and I am grateful for that relief.

We have had always times where we have felt meaningless or even forsaken and we struggle to find our own purpose... yet every time we find it again it moves us closer to understand who we are, to create a new layer or your own strength. I embrace my sorrow, it hurts... but it hurts because I care of things.
My sorrow is not my enemy, sometimes I get engulfed by it and my heart and soul is devoted to write new wistful lullabies. Being vulnerable is not being weak.
My sadness has inspired me many times (for example to write this song). I have learned from it. It has reminded I am living, numbing your emotions is not. And then I stopped feeling like Nothing. But still I share this little ghost lullaby to you.

Quiet... suspended in stillness while we float again into consciousness. And I'm no longer a shadow. I return to flesh and bone and I feel everything again.

shadows - by priscilla Hernandez (yidneth.com).jpg

Post Data... I dreamt of you

By the way, Tuula, Kira...

I dreamt of you

My sweet Tuula, where were your sisters? I could not see them in that dream.

And It hurts still but it hurts because I miss you and I love you (still and forever). Thanks for the comfort of your memories. The warmth of the love you gifted to me. I cannot help it, it hurts, as it always does when you care. I miss you, I care and I'm proud of myself because of that. I'm unshielded and vulnerable and that's precisely my strength.

And then I opened my eyes. I was no longer dreaming and you were gone. But I knew you love me too. And I will meet you in that field of dandelions where you all wait for me.
Yes one day...

but not yet...

I always say...

Remember who you were
Be aware of who you are
Decide who you will be


This song belongs to my album Ancient Shadows: The Ghost and the Fairy available at yidneth.com, spotify, itunes, etc.

©Priscilla Hernandez (http://yidneth.com)

  • Go here to listen to other my spectral tunes: Off the Lane


Priscilla Hernandez
singer-songwriter & illustrator
http://yidneth.com

(c)Music and Lyrics by Priscilla Hernandez
Steemit post includes VIDEOCLIP additional art and background story
The song belongs to my album ANCIENT SHADOWS that can be found on spotify, itunes, and on my own website as illustrated digipack. Always grateful of your support.



► Listen on DSound

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Thats beautiful Yid. Really is. The lyrics have a bit of a Serena vibe. She loves these themes.
Of course the sound, the scenery is amazing... And strings always make a song sound better. haha :D

@silentscreamer and @yidneth.. join me, my sisters.. and we'll go to a valley on the dark side of the moon and eat crater cookies and drink moon wine. I don't like wine on Earth, but maybe moon wine would be nice.

It is a beautiful post, Priscilla. I know you have been in a dark time, and things have been hard recently, and I know how comforting it can be sometimes just to crawl under the cloak and to nestle into a pillow and forget the world. But I also know how beautiful it is when you're standing in sunlight.. glitter and magic and light swirling round. You will step into the light again soon. I feel it. Maybe even today. ♥ For the darkness can't win.

That is an amazing video, btw. Your cinematography skills are a thing of brilliance. And the illustration you did and how in the video it came to life as you walked out.. that was breathtaking. You are so talented. SO talented.

Big hugs, lots of love..
If I ever grow courage enough to cover you for cover a steemian it will be this song.

♥-Serena

Thank you, actually Serena knows the bud of this song, because I first released a demo version in 2002 while we were both part of mp3.com, yes Serena and I have that in common, the spectral dark side of the moon, the longing and looking beauty in sadness too... I adore her, she's a humble kind soul. And I know that yes, she may understand these words.
Yes this video is rather simple and has its "mistakes" but still it was a bit made like a patchwork which shows... I agree, and I actually you know why I miss to have a cello player at hand, most of the bass in all my songs is made by one... Fax me one, and you over with the violin in the same parcel. LOL. Have a lovely weekend songbird!

The voice of an angel as always @yidneth

Love how the cemetary video compliments the song. It makes it ever more...sadder I guess. Soft and gentle song...really nice

Thank you, soft and gentle, it is a hurting memory but wont be forgotten. Thanks.

We become quiet observers, we can fly and hover... invisible. But you can't stay there for too long, because when darkness start to numb your feelings you may become a ghost.

Yes. This. I do this. More than I should.

This song is just beautiful (and the video is amazing!).

I'm like you in a lot of ways, yet still very different. I really love that.

...my words are a little broken today. But you know I love you. 😍

I love the ephemeral quality of this piece, and the video pulls your emotions along. I'm glad I was able to hear this.

I miss my Lilu... 🐶

Aww they live in our love from them. There is a dandeliom fields where Kira waits for me too. The song is not only about loss but also about longing. But I think to feel sad you must "care". It is kind of beautiful and make the happy moments more vibrant. Balance.

Nice song! I can get lost in your music for hours! Love your voice, so beautiful! Upvoted :)

but I lay in bed
soaking in the pain and discomfort
Every last drop
Of sublime Mellon Collie
and the eternal emptiness

Love the weird...keep it up..!!!

I do take it as a compliment, thank you... ♥️

Of course it is. Love your work 💖

Congratulations! This excellent post was chosen by the new curation initiative of the @postpromoter content promotion service to receive a free upvote!

This post exemplifies the type of great content that we at @postpromoter enjoy reading and would love to see more of on the Steem platform. Keep up the good work!

Wow...that touches me. Really. <3

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