Is it better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? ecotrain QOTW

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When I look back at any of the few times I have been in love I don’t feel like I should have avoided it. In spite of the difficulty with which some of them ended, each one has been unique in what I learnt about life and more importantly about myself.

One of the things that I wouldn’t have learnt except through being in love is that there are authentic love and other feelings and needs that we often confuse with it. Authentic love is essentially not something we chose to have neither we find a rational reason for. It is unconditional and unsusceptible to rules. A raw energy that can’t be tamed. The mysterious warmth that sneaks into our hearts and eventually filling our whole being. It has nothing to do with reciprocity as the other party's involvement is not a factor. It is more of a personal thing, a feeling that comes out of the blue that has nothing to do with others. We expect nothing from them and their mere existence enchanted us. It is rewarding itself. When two people authentically love each other in people’s eyes they are the most unlikely to fall for one another. Authentic love goes the same way it comes.

In the times I felt authentically loving someone, life had been greatly meaningful. This kind of mystical love brings parts of the soul together making one feels stable and in control. I then felt very satisfies with life, and such feeling is independent of what life has to offer you aside from love.

The love you can rationalize is not an authentic one. If love can be associated with a reason it can be anything but love. In many contexts, Infatuation, attachment, escaping from loneliness, or sexual desire can be disguised in love if it were not for being involved in love you would never be able to emotionally distinguish between what love is and what it isn’t.

Another thing I had learnt from my first relationship – I was then a teenager- that life is not always going to move in the direction we perceive as critical to our happiness. I went out of that relationship feeling like I was a total failure. Later I realized that such a loss helped me mature. I then learnt how to be emotionally independent and responsible for how I deal with my emotions.

You never get out of a relationship the same person you have been before. Love teaches us compassion, patience, altruism, and sympathy. Love makes us better humans.

No matter how painful things might end up, its worth. the closeness you have with someone, the moments you spent together, the mutual trust you built, the hardships you went through and even the pain you eventually felt would tell you that you once had something meaningful in your life, that you are strong enough to survive whatever loss you suffer and give you the hope that what happened once can happen again.

the more we emotionally mature the more we realize that no one is responsible for what we feel, and no one shall be expected to appreciate our love the way we do.

Eventually, we never meant to be victimized by love. Either when it comes or when it goes we are blessed to open to that dimension of feelings that is not available to many. some are blessed for a lifetime, others for a limited time but they still have the good memories to keep their emotions alive.

Thank You :)