Challenge #01949-E125: Naked Without it
Pointy hats! There are the black, with a brim witch's model, the sparkly and starred wizard or wizzard's, the upside down ice cream cone with a floaty veil princess model and the plain paper cone with a big "D" for dunce. -- Knitnan
[AN: I don't think the D-cap existed outside of the Victorian Era]
You couldn't deny he was a wizard. The hat was a huge give-away. It made his full, wizarding height two feet taller and he changed it in all other ways from town to town. One week, it was dripping with gimcrack jewellery from fantasy dollar stores. The next, it was festooned with flowers and illusory beads of dew that sparkled in the light. It said 'wizard' louder than any collection of sequins, erroneous spelling, or arcane symbolism could manage.
And it made him easy to spot in a crowd. Something for which Sazed was eternally grateful, because he stood a chance of stopping Taako from blowing all their profits on more gimcrack jewellery, swatches of interesting fabric, or other decorations for that fucking hat. Or, failing that, some kind of knock-off high fashion that involved thirty near-identical shirts. It had got to the point where Taako could mouth along to the We're on a budget, damnit speech.
And now, heart-stoppingly, that damn hat was on a hat-rack. Outside somewhere that looked really expensive to be inside.
There was a gorgeous Elf on the other side of the door from the hat-rack. Simultaneously guarding the headgear of the rich or famous or both, whilst also greeting anyone who was contemplating going inside. This Elf was not Taako. She was an eye-catching blueish-green and definitely a Sea Elf. Turned out in wafty frills in ocean colours and bedecked by fake pearls as well as glittering glass. "You must be Sazed," she said. "Taako said you'd be looking for him."
Sazed closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Please tell me that he hasn't spent all of his gold?" Of the things that Taako could never resist buying, an opportunity to be pampered was the one that pissed the most into the wind.
In answer the Elf at the door guided Sazed inside, where more sensibly-dressed attendees were tarting up Taako. He had two attendants per limb. One coiffing his hair. One delicately helping him drink with a fantasy fun straw, and a third giving him a massage through a ridiculous full-body drop cloth.
"Suzu, I feel you having a conniption from here," said Taako by way of a greeting. "I'm just getting ready for today's show, sweetie. This is gratis."
"We've had an uptick in bookings already," grinned the fancy greeter. "And that's just with his hat outside the door. Imagine what's going to happen after this show."
Sazed relaxed. An endorsement deal. That explained the mani-pedi, the massage, the hairdressers, the mud mask, and everything else orbiting around Planet Taako. "So this isn't actually costing us anything?"
"Gratis means free, homie," Taako breezed. "I even swung you a free treat. You need to relax. And I want to see what you look like all fancied up for a change."
One of the attendants said, "Okay, we need to transport you to the Foot Station for the rest of your treatment."
It took three of them to help Taako up, and then jarring reality asserted itself. He was shorn of both his trademark hat and his usual four-inch heels.
Taako barely came up to some of these other Elves' clavicles. He was short for an Elf. He was even short for a human.
Maybe he sensed Sazed staring, because he lifted one of the cucumber slices off his eyes and delivered a boiling-hot glare of certain doom that predicted previously unseen levels of wrath to any roadie/bodyguard/assistant/drivers who dared to so much as say one peep about Taako's obvious insecurity.
Sazed very wisely sucked in his lips and made a zipping motion.
Taako gave an approving nod, replaced the cucumber, and let his attendants guide him to the foot station. Peace temporarily restored.
[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / ylivdesign]
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