Curious Katie - A Fictional Tale Of A Child Learning How The World Works - Episode 11

Katie's summer road trip with her parents continues.  

Katie:  Are we almost there? I sure am hungry.
Mom:  Yes, dear.  Only a bit longer and we’ll be in a big city.

Katie:  Why didn’t we take the last exit? They had signs for food.
Dad:  Good question, Katie.  We didn’t want to stop there because it looked like all of the options were fast food.

Mom:  Or “fake food” as I like to call it.
Katie:  Why do you call it “fake food”?

Mom:  Because, dear, a lot of it isn’t natural. It’s made with all kinds of nasty chemicals that aren’t healthy.    
Dad:  Yeah, we’ll be able to find some restaurants that serve organic food in the city.  I consider that one of the city’s few favorable features.     

Katie:  Whoa, say that 3 times really fast! Good tongue twister, dad! So why did you say that about cities?
Dad:  Because your mother and I don’t like big cities.  At least, not to live in.

Katie:  Why not?
Mom:  Well, dear, lots of reasons.  When you live in a big city, you don’t have much space.

Dad:  Or peace and quiet.  It’s so loud.
Mom:  But I think the worst part is, the bigger the city, the bigger the violent gang called government.    

Dad:  And wherever there’s a big government gang, there are more violently enforced restrictions on freedom.  And higher rates of extortion, too.    

Mom:  And the control freaks that are in the government mob love to have people in cities, because it makes the people easier to control.    

Katie:  Wow.  So why do so many people live in cities?
Mom:  Great question, dear.  There are lots of reasons, and I don’t claim to know them all.  What I do know is that people are enticed to live in cities.

Katie:  What does “entice” mean?
Mom:  It means to tempt, or cause to feel desire.  For example, if you see and smell apple pie, it might entice you to eat some.    

Katie:  Oh, I get it.  So how are people enticed to live in cities?
Dad:  One way is that movies and TV shows almost always take place in the city.  They make it look hip to

Mom interrupts.

Mom (giggling):  Did you just say “hip” dear?
Dad:  Yeah, so?

Katie:  I thought hip was a body part.
Mom (sighing):  It is, dear.  But it has other meanings.  In this case, what “hip” meant is popular or stylish.    

Dad:  Hip is a perfectly good word.
Mom:  You’re right, dear.  I’m sorry for interrupting.    

Dad:  That’s ok, dear.  So anyway, people are persuaded through TV and movies that big cities are fun, exciting, and full of opportunity.    

Mom:  Which in some ways, they are.  There are lots of interesting things to see and do in a city.
Dad:  But at what cost?

Mom:  Exactly.
Katie:  What do you mean by that?

Mom:  Well, dear, it’s very difficult, sometimes impossible, to be self-sufficient in a big city.    
Dad:  And there’s less freedom in big cities.    

Katie:  Less freedom! So people give up freedom so they can be entertained?   

Mom:  It’s not quite that simple, dear.  But yes, that’s part of it.   And they’re not consciously giving up freedom, dear.  Most people don’t usually think about it because they’re under mind control.

Katie:  There’s that pesky mind control again!
 
 
A bit later, they’re getting into the outer edges of the city.  Katie looks out the window and notices a sign with a strange message.

Katie:  Hey, that sign said “speed limit photo enforced”.  What does that mean?

Mom:  Well, Katie, it means that if someone drives a vehicle faster than what a group of government gang members thinks is ok, then a machine will take a picture of the car and driver.  Then a piece of paper will be sent to the car owner’s house, demanding that they pay some violence-backed fraud notes to the government gang.  If the person doesn’t pay, then they’ll face more serious consequences and threats from the government mob.    

Katie:  Violence-backed fraud notes are US dollars, right?

Mom:  That’s right, dear.  So “speed limit photo enforcement” is another form of extortion the government gang commits.    

An hour later, and they’re getting into much thicker traffic and nearing downtown.  A traffic light turns yellow just as they go through it.  A machine on the side of the road flashes just as they get across to the other side of the intersection.

Katie:  Hey, what was that flash?
Mom (facepalm):  Oh, dear.

Dad:  Was that what I think it was?
Mom:  If you think that was an electronic red light bandit for the government gang, then you’re correct.   

Katie:  What’s an electronic red light bandit?

Mom:  It’s a machine like the one we talked about earlier, but for red lights instead.  It helps the criminal syndicate called government steal dollars.   
Dad:  But it was yellow when we went through!

Mom:  Yes, dear.  I know.  But the authoritarian mob called government doesn’t care about the truth.    
Dad (sighs):  Well, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.  Maybe it didn’t get us.

20 minutes later, they're slowly driving around, looking for parking.

Dad (flustered):  This is another thing I don’t like about big cities.  Parking in the street can be a nightmare.    
Mom (pointing, excited):  There, dear! That car is leaving! You can take that spot!

Dad:  Good eye, dear.    

He pulls into a tight spot and they carefully maneuver themselves out of the car.  Katie eyes the parking meter.

Katie:  What’s this funny looking thing?

Dad:  That’s called a parking meter.  If we don’t put violence-backed fraud coins in it, then a mind-controlled person from the government mafia will come and rob us.

Mom:  Or steal our car.   
Katie:  Wow! That’s ridiculous!

They walk into a sharp, gleaming restaurant called “Chez Veg” and are seated at a nice table by the window.  After a few minutes, a waiter comes to take their order.

Katie:  Hey, mister, how are you?
Waiter:  Fine, thanks.  And you?

Katie:  I’m hungry.    
Waiter:  We’ll see if we can remedy that.

Mom:  Are all the ingredients in the papaya salad organic?
Waiter:  All but the dressing.

Mom:  There aren’t any poisons in the dressing though, are there?
Waiter (gulps, flushes):  Uh, poisons?

Mom:  You know, like high fructose corn syrup or some other artificial gunk like that.    
Waiter:  Oh, no, not at all.  It’s just that some of the oil and spices in the dressing aren’t organic.    

Mom:  Ok, I’ll have that, then.    
Dad:  I’ll have the falafel wrap, please.

Katie:  And I’ll have the gluten free pasta, please.    

After their meal, the waiter drops the bill off and mom has a look.    

Mom:  How much of a tip should we leave, dear?
Dad:  The service was good.  I say 20 percent.

Mom:  That sounds good.
Katie:  Do waiters get extorted?

Mom:  Yes, dear.  Nearly everyone gets extorted.
Katie:  Well, if we leave him a cash tip, then how will the government gang extort him?   

Mom:  That’s a good question, dear.  I’m not sure.

The waiter comes to collect the payment.    

Katie:  Hey, mister, how much does the gang extort you for?
Waiter (gasps): Um, excuse me?   

Katie:  Ya know, the criminal gang called government.  They extort you.
Waiter:  I still don’t follow.

Katie:  Taxes.  You do pay taxes, right, mister?
Waiter: Oh, oh, yes.  I never thought of taxation as extortion before, but now I get it.    

Katie:  So if we give you a ten dollar cash tip, how much will get extorted from you?

Waiter (peers around over shoulders):  Well, we’re supposed to claim all our tips at the end of our shift in the computer, but I don’t claim the cash. (grins)

Katie: Hey, that’s great mister! Way to dodge those thieves!
Waiter (raises quizzical brow, looks at parents):  How old is she?

Parents smile happily and hand the waiter cash.    

Dad:  Keep the change.   
Waiter:  I will, sir.  All of it. 

Thanks for your time and attention!

Just say "NO" to slavery!

Top image is from pixabay