The Meg (film): Bad! I mean really bad

in #films6 years ago (edited)

I can honestly say that this is the worst movie that I have seen in years. Years. I feel as though i deserve some sort of award for having sat through all of it.

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I'm not going to get into specifics because I couldn't bear to focus that much on this movie. Basically a bunch of researchers are doing some stuff really deep in the ocean and and really proud of themselves for being the first people other than James Cameron to do research at such a massive depth. I think it was 12,000 feet, i don't remember. Anyway, they accidentally stumble upon a massive shark and then accidentally do something to the thermocline in order to allow it to come to the surface and now they have to kill it! before.... well i presume before it wipes out humanity I guess.

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The methods that they use in order to track and kill the "Meg" are increasingly absurd, and of course most of these methods involve the sending of a single person to a position where they have to be rescued by Jason Statham in some capacity or another.

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I don't want to say that this is a direct ripoff of Jaws because that would be far too obvious. What I do think this is, is an actually very clever mix of western stars with Chinese stars in order to attract a Chinese audience at the box office. Well, plenty of USA people went to see it as well but overall the "international" box office was what made this movie make a bunch of money.

Perhaps I am being cruel, but this movie is just completely ridiculous and well, I didn't like it at all. Maybe I am looking at it the wrong way. Perhaps it is meant to be over-the-top in a comedy-type-sense. If that is the case than well, I would give it a few extra points.

You can see all of what is going to happen just in the trailer, but now imagine that Jason Statham is going to have to go on a string of single-handed rescue missions that become more and more absurd as time goes by. That is essentially the movie. Good luck! Points awarded only for CGI, which should be pretty incredible seeing as how they spent nearly 200 million on this turd.

The only good thing that happened was that this little princess was spared (although many others were not)

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3 / 10

Sort:  

Let's hire that martial arts fighting dude, Jason Statham, and give him nothing to realistically fight.

Let's have a billionaire who invests a billion in a project but has no idea what they're doing till he arrives at the base he financed.

Let's have said billionaire do some kind of helicopter nonsense mission to cover his tracks that's unnecessarily dumb and obviously a suicide mission.

Let's have a guy who works on ocean rescue for a living, but hasn't learned how to swim.

Let's have a mysterious layer of the deep that somehow nothing has ever escaped from, even though we can easily float a submersible in and out of there.

Let's have some dude swim rapidly to the surface of water from the deep without his ears even popping or any apparent consequences.

Let's just have Jason Statham say the words "It's a megalodon," and act like that's the coolest line ever written, when he's just stating an effin fact in the world of the movie.

Let's give Statham supposedly emotional backstories that appear to have no resonance or impact whatsoever on anything.

Let's have absolutely no characters whatsoever that a sane person could possibly relate to or believe in, let alone like.

On the other side, there's a good scene where a little girl walks about in an underwater tube and a giant shark looms behind her.

I guess that last scene really worked, or people just love to forgive Jason Statham anything (including me, I love that guy), cos this movie made way more than predicted.

I seriously doubt Statham would ever waste his precious remaining life on a sequel though, so expect his brother played by some other dumbass to appear in the sequel.

What a load of crap. :)

all fantastic points. The little girl was cute, but this begs the question of why is a little girl wandering around, completely unattended in a billion dollar research facility?

I saw the movie one week ago and was horrible!, to be honest I prefer watch "Sharknado" movies at least I have fun watching them.

Yea 3/10 sounds about right, such an amazing plot that it could of been 100X better but I guess with some ideas its a bit hard to come to life.

The story of this movie itself is such a joke, i watched it and there is nothing to remember about this movie most especially of you have watched much better movies of such a kind.

Lol.
Let me go check out other reviews, from both moviegoers and fans.

I haven't seen her yet, but the shark movie series are my favorites. The picture of the little dog in the water gave me a chill.
Good vibe.

@gooddream - Just FYI. This guy rips all of his comments directly from rotten tomatoes and metacritic.com. I called him out on it on another post, which he flagged me for, which is kind of funny because I didn't flag him for blatant plagiarism.

He copied this one from here: https://www.metacritic.com/movie/the-meg/user-reviews

Scroll down to user GrantD243 and you can see the post that he copied. Cut it out @as-abir, or I will start flagging you. I have seen you post a few legitimate posts (as far as I can tell) so I know that you can do it. It isn't cool copying other's work.

and i will join you @nuthman in flagging. Thanks for pointing this out :)

Yeah, I was going to leave it alone with a warning, but then he went to my blog and flagged my posts as well as some comments. I hadn't even flagged him, just asked to stop plagiarizing people.

going back through all my others i realize that this person does the same thing every time. I have removed all of my rewards for them. Thanks for the heads up. but to be honest I should have known that when someone seamlessly spells all the actors names correctly and knows intimate details about film locations etc a mere 20 minutes after i posted it.... it's probably a copy / paste

It's a real shame because i upvote comments for saying just about anything - it doesn't even have to make sense or even be in English.

Yeah, what caught my eyes was the inconsistency in his writing. It never seemed like the same person.

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