Oh Whoa-is-me

First, forgive the title, I wasn't quite sure how to spell it, and I'll admit, if it wasn't for spellcheck, and programs like Grammarly, I'd have to hire my grandson or someone else with a better edumacation to take dictation and post for me.

I will be the first to admit my vocabulary isn't what it should be, BUT it isn't the reason I use profanity at times. Profanity is a part of me, has been for some time, actually not quite sure when it started, think it was after the birth of our second child… hey the booze alone wasn't doing for it for me, and I'd long since gave up chemical experiments, if you know what I mean. I kid you, kids are our greatest gift... ask anyone without them!

I actually went back to school, at the age of 55, got my GED in 5 months, it was a record for this particular school… I shit you not. No, it wasn't Trump University. It was actually quite an experience. The student body was quite diverse, from countries all over the world.

I'd quit school halfway through grade 11, I, at the time thought I knew enough, and after being in the workforce for a few months, realized I'd out smarted myself. Oh, and just so you know, in my day, I was given a choice, get a job, or find another place to live, and if you knew my dad, when he spoke, and he didn't often, he meant what he said. I was working within two weeks of quitting school!

Getting back to the profanity, it sort of slips through my fingertips without me even realizing I've done it. Sometimes I catch myself when talking, like the other day, my friend and I were driving along a highway and were approaching an on ramp. This is where if you are trying to enter the highway, you are to MERGE into traffic on the highway. We even slowed down so this poor lady could enter safely… did she, NO! She came to a full stop and almost had the ass end of her car stowed in. Did I yell out dumbass…No, I bit my tongue and held it in… see, no profanity.

I did tell my friend that where I use to live, the on ramps actually had signs saying MERGE, in 3 languages, english, french, and Newfoundlander… for those "new" to driving! (I'm kidding) It's just two languages, the Newfies have to figure it out on their own! By the way, I'm married to a Newfie, and even she laughs at me for some of the "things" I say about Newfies and Newfoundland. Although she gets a little miffed when people ask her where she is from, and she replies, "Originally Newfoundland", and I pipe in, yup, she finally left and now she lives here in Canada with me!

Well I just lost my train of thought, the cat distracted me and any thoughts I had were directed at the cat, who is still sitting here beside me, paw outstretched looking for an ear and head rub. So I have to go.

Oh, and Happy Halloween, the only day of the year that parents willingly let their children take candy from strangers…

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