#FiftyWords: Flames of the Mist (Final Fantasy IV - fanfic)
She stared at the body of her mother, flames engulfed the land as the guardian of the mist died.
Hi everyone, this time the post is half gaming post, and half #Fiftywords story, I wrote it after I read @gaming-stuff's entry.
Warning: Minor Spoilers
Or maybe?... This story is based (but different) on a scene from Final Fantasy IV (the first hour of it.) I wanted to write a review the game first but since the time for this prompt is near the end, I decided to post it right now. The actual scene is of course more complicated.
You can read it even if you don't know what Final Fantasy is.
Flames of the Mist
Tears streamed on her face as her mother took her last breath. Fire burned the land as a dark Knight emerged from the flames. He caught her despite the protests, pleading her to live, as the last drops of blood fell from his sword. Her mother's Killer, was her savior. [The End]
What do you think?
Like every time, I believe it could be way better in 100 words, and this time I struggled with the title, do I make it The Dark Savior? Finally I settled on this one, I don't know if it makes sense.
If you're interested in Final Fantasy IV you can see the posts I wrote about it before, about the whole FF series or the How well-designed the game is. I say this scene fits the 2D versions of the game more than the 3D.
But mostly I'm interested to know what people who don't know the game, especially non gamers would say about the story above.
Like "Stay Safe, Papa", Backyard or Mother's Last Chocolate
I’m not a gamer, @ahmadmanga, but I love this! I did read it first in the post comment. And I’m still thinking: wait, what? So he attempted to kill her and then saved her from dying? That’s intense! Great job with the imagery.
I knew I didn't write it in an obvious way, he killed her mother by mistake and saved her to "redeem" that... well, it's complicated.
Especially from the girl POV where she looked at him killing her mother and then telling her to live, she must have thought: "Wait, what?" too...
I'm just glad that you liked it, though I wish I could've worded it better.
Any story is difficult to tell in 50 words. A complicated story is nearly impossible. But it’s valiant to try!
Yeah, trying to make it the best it can be is satisfying!!
I like how its short and to the point!
I also love the picture cover as well!
Thanks for reading. Fiftywords story had to be "to the point" writing stripping the complexity of the story to fit that, is a challenge I really love.