Adventuring With The Twins & Learning Not To Rush Decisions

in #healthy-home6 years ago

When naptime rolls around, it's not uncommon for one twin to end up wide awake while the other is happily sleeping. Usually, it means a poopy diaper or a hungry baby. But this time, Squirt was content just playing on the floor with me.

After she gave up trying to get my iPad, I was able to capture a few shots of what the world is like from her perspective.

As the twins become stronger crawlers, the play area (also our living room) has become a land of adventure and excitement. Toys that were only good for sticking in their mouths have become things that can be scooted and flipped. Our little explorers have figured out that by lifting up the playmat, there's a completely different design underneath!

Watching everything from their eyes is a reminder of how interesting this world really is.

Life lessons learned from watching babies


Today we took the girls to the pool. It was really quiet and no kids were out, so after swimming around in the deep end, we went to the kiddie area. With us supporting them, the girls were excited to realize that they could touch the bottom with their toes. Squish had been looking pretty serious the entire time, but once she realized that this was just like a bigger bathtub, she got really excited. Pretty soon she was babbling and laughing. She even enjoyed floating on her back.

Matt and I noticed how much that's like me. When things feel out of control, I'm tense, watchful. But as soon as I realize that there's stability, I can calm down and let myself relax.

Learning more about myself


As I was doing some research on team building for work, I was reading some things about my personality (from this site). There was one characteristic that caught my attention:

"They like to have closure on decisions, and may come to decisions too quickly as a result."

The description mentioned that because ENFJs tend to rush their decisions (whether to resolve conflict, find closure, etc.), they often end up with regrets or disappointments.

I know that whenever I go shopping, I'm prone to buyer's remorse, but I hadn't really thought of that as the result of rushing decisions. As I reflected on it though, I realized that it's true. Looking for the best possible solution that is the most convenient for others or avoids the most conflict, I'm not always assertive about what I'm looking for as an outcome. So of course, that outcome doesn't usually happen.

Applying what I'm learning


It made me stop and think about all the decisions we have to make right now. For one, our decision about where we're going to live.

We recently found another apartment, but as the owner kept changing the conditions, I voiced my concerns to Matt that maybe we weren't really getting what we wanted.

Now, it would've been easier to just "go with the flow" - not only would it mean we could finally stop apartment hunting, but it'd also make things easier for our agent as she'd have less back-and-forth. But after reflecting on my past decisions, I told myself that struggling through the process is worthwhile in itself. Going with the flow for the sake of having a decision wouldn't guarantee that we'd made the right one.

We finally told our agent that we weren't interested and started our search from square one. She was very understanding and happy to help us keep looking. And I was encouraged that I hadn't rushed the process.

A couple hours later, we got a call from the owner's agent and the owner agreed to go back to the original offer.

Even though we ended up where we wanted, I was thankful for the struggles of the process. Through it, Matt and I were able to narrow down what we really wanted, what we could live without, and have a better understanding of what's available on the market in our range (... which isn't much).

One decision down ... how many more to go?

So now, it looks like we know where we're going to live! It is a relief to have one major decision settled. There's a fifteen-day window to move from this apartment into that one, so that's also comforting. I know it won't be easy with two little ones in tow. Having ample time will make things a little more manageable.

More decisions to be made though ... including the one that may come after Matt's interview tomorrow. We'll have to wait and see!

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Squirt is getting so big and even more cute!!!

I love the way you found the silver lining in your life experiences and that the twins helped!

Big smiles and hearts!!!

<3 <3 <3

So glad to see you back online @opti-mrs! Your positive outlook is always appreciated :D But I hope you've been doing well in real life and enjoying some outdoor time! How's your garden looking?

You too!

The garden has some tiny green friends starting to fill in and start up! It is my second favorite time (the fav being harvest!).

Thank you!

Wow, moving again! Seems I need to go back and read up on everything you have been up to since I was last caught up.

Good for you on being determined with the apartment owner and willing to put your agent to work. Since living spaces are such an important decision, that is a very good place to 'get what you want.'

I hope the move goes well! Moves were never any fun to me!! :-P

Thx

Haha, yep, blink an eye around here and we’re off on another adventure 😅 so glad to see you back! I hope you’re doing well!

Yey!!! Congrats on finding the new apartment (and for the curie vote!). The things you said about rushing decisions are true. I'm a culprit myself for this. May that be on buying stuff at the grocery or finding a new job, I tend to rush things and make hasty decisions. I decided not to rush on finding a new job recently (trust me, I'd really wanted to quit the job right away but as moms, we have bills to pay right?) and made sure that the new one would be worth it. Took me (still is taking me since I'm still stuck here with my current job doing turn-over) more than 2 months just for the 2 interviews and finally landing on the job. But as you may have known from my past post, the deal was worth it. So yeah, it pays not to rush things. Now, maybe I should start to do the same when it comes to matters of the heart.lol

woww! well articulated, never knew you had twins. This is how you turned what others see as "disturbance" into a life lesson @helenoftroy

I like the thought of that ... turning disturbances into life lessons! That's something I hope I can pass onto my kids. Otherwise, they'll just see life as a series of disappointments instead of things to learn from :)

I just like your mindset. Madam Helen, are you on any of the discord channels

I don’t really have time with the twins ... but I know I should become more active there!

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