The Ultimate Purpose Fantasy

Last night I was watching this short Youtube video essay I found from films for action. It tells you how the video games, fantasy movies, and fiction let you immerse yourself in exciting new worlds. All the stories of extraordinary adventures that keep you distracted from the routine of daily lives. The video made me ponder again about my own adventures and next quests. It also makes me think about what is it that really draws you into the characters or heroes of these fantasy stories?

Back in the day, I was playing this online RPG game where I get to level up my game character to be more powerful. As I got more powerful, I was able to defeat more monsters and finish quests easily. I was also once a leader of a guild. I got to help new members to level up using my character skills and abilities. As a guild leader, I needed to encourage players to stay within the guild and help each other. It felt really good to have a status and power even just within the fantasy game. I was so addicted to this world that it almost felt like real life. However, what was it that really attracted me to play this game?

What happens when I've already achieved all the levels? When I've already finished all the challenging quests? When I already have all the powerful weapons and armors? After all the status achievement, everything became meaningless. It also became my goal within the game to not just level up and acquire all the powerful equipment but also to be part of the community. To serve others. This is why most of the game developers design games that are meant to be addicting, to keep the players playing. To design new challenging levels and quests. The online communities also drive more players to play with others. It's the sense of belonging that lets players stay in the game.

In real life, the quest to achieve material possessions is nothing but a means to an end. Suddenly everything comes rushing into your life - education, career, and wealth. After that, stagnation occurs. It appears that the worst thing in life is just to exist, it's like slowly being sucked into the existential vacuum. Whether your environment or instinct drive you towards what you need to do, soon enough you don't know what to do anymore.

According to Viktor Frankl, the existential vacuum is the widespread phenomenon of the twentieth century. A man loses his animal instinct as he becomes trapped in conformity. In this day and age, there are a lot of things you cannot do anymore. It seems that people are being directed to do whatever they ought to do, losing that instinct in the process. People are suffering in this modern existential dilemma - what now? People don't know what to do in their lives. They either wish to do what other people do (conformism) or do what others wish them to do (totalitarianism).

You are drawn into those fantasy films and video games because those have something that everyone wishes to have in life - the ultimate purpose. Defeating the enemies, saving others from evil, finding someone to love, preparing for the dangers of nightfall, getting past the challenging quests - these things are in people's fantasies. Doing something for the higher purpose. People get the chance to experience emotionally taxing events without all the associated real-life dangers, enemies, risks, anxiety or stress. It is way easier to just sit and watch or play than to get up in the morning, pick up the weapon and save mankind from the evil rulers. Who would not want to eliminate boredom without all the emotional downside? It looks like people are made to be distracted in order to prevent going back to that animal instinct of doing whatever they want. People choose whatever is easier and more convenient which will only lead to - lack of meaning.

I've written a lot about my own sufferings in the past but now I think I am made to cope with all of it after all. To cope with life's hardships is better than nothing. Nothing is the worst feeling. A life empty of meaning and purpose. In my previous article, I was writing about how I spent the last 4 years traveling and living in other countries out of hopelessness. Just because I couldn't think of what else to do in life so I'd rather just die while doing whatever. However, life works in a funny way. I didn't realize I'd pick up some hope along the way. Something else to do besides existing, because even though you are having fun seeing places around the world, in the end, it's like the game. This life level loses its charm. You have to find another challenge to conquer. You have to keep on moving.

I don't claim to know my higher purpose yet, in fact, I've spent all my life getting to know my purpose or at least whatever I really want to do in life for now. It might change in time or I might proceed to another level, who knows? I just like that I've gotten past the all that participating in the society stage: education and career. I've gotten past the traveling stage. Now I'm in this stage in my life that I want to have the freedom to live life on my own terms by gaining financial independence. I want to create something for myself and let that something be useful and helpful to others as well. With my freedom, hopefully, I'd be able to see the world again. I also want to find someone to love. Those are just the next levels in my life. I design my own pattern now. I have to make the most of it because I only get one turn.

I think the real spiritual turning point in my life is removing the fear of death and using that lack of fear to do whatever I want to do in life. Life has become more exciting now than ever. The fearless characters in fantasy games are not afraid to die. Their heroic endeavors are in people's fantasies. These days people are just made to stay within the illusion of safety and security. Life's pattern has already been constructed to be unconsciously followed. I think using the lack of fear of death to do something different in life can be the way to get out of the curse of stagnation and boredom in the modern society. Only then you will courageously follow the animal instinct of doing what you really want to do and not what others are doing or what others want you to do. Only then you will see your ultimate purpose. Sure, this another level in life is full of challenges along the way but you'll wake up feeling different. You'll wake up feeling alive. I think once you get the fear out of the way, only then life becomes more meaningful. You become free to create your own meaning.