Positive and social human beingsteemCreated with Sketch.

in #life5 years ago

In the past few months, I did a lot of thinking. About the life itself, and the work I do and I think I finally came to a conclusion. I am a social human being, and I simply cannot live in my isolated world only writing 3D measuring programs. Period.

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Well, saying this "out loud" makes me feel better. Especially when I look back into my life... So many years went by without having many people around me (besides family of course) of whom I could say they were my real true friends, and I kept contacts with them until now. Sadly only one, an even that person I met in my second year of college.

But that changed when I started working in my present firm. So many good and positive people made my day happier. In two years I made a lot of good friends, and simply realized I really don't want to be alone. Don't want to live a life without friends. Friends who can listen to me, give me advice or to whom I can be moral support if not more. But I must admit I am a tough character. I speak my mind freely. For instance, if I have issues with someone I will tell him in his face. I will tell him everything which is lying on my mind. But I don't expect any different behavior from their side. Because I don't like hypocrisy. All those people with their smiley faces looking around, making bubbly small talk with others, and even joke with each other like they are best friends. But when they turn their back the gossip and blaming each other starts.

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So I think not having a proper filter is a good thing. Everybody knows where is my mind about him. But there is also a negative side of it... My words can really hurt others. I know... Some because they don't want to hear that from others mouth, and some because they think I made a personal vendetta over them, and I see only their mistakes or wrongdoing... But that isn't true. I only try to restore a positive working environment with open communication with others. Try to resolve issues to work better together... But I don't know if it is not too late. If people are really so careless and don't bother about quality work. Do everyone really only see the money before their eyes? Ok, I know everyone needs money to survive, live, and enjoy life... But when did such turn happened? When did people become so selfish, and start thinking only about their own life, and not about the lives of others if not doing their work properly, making bad parts, and maybe making a small human error in a production of an appliance or even car which can endanger others lives?

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After having a nasty argument with my coworker today made me remember why I didn't keep friends from my past - negativism, and hypocrisy - two things I don't want to have around me. But now my path crossed with few such people again. And I panic. I wanna do like I did in the past. I want to run away and leave them behind. But I can't for many reasons. So now I am here, trying to be strong, trying to learn how to mentally survive pessimism which is starting to surround me. A tough task for an optimist on the edge of their sanity... But I will not give up, I will rather try to leave all written questions in "the air", than keeping them inside. Just too afraid, I will lose my positive look on life because of such people...

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I don't know if any of you really read all those words I threw in the thin air, but I simply had to. So now, mentally exhausted I will read a few pages of the book I am reading, and then go to bed. Only one happy taught today - thankfully tomorrow is Friday. Good night.

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Human beings are funny things. They want to hear the truth, but, only if you want to praise them. I daresay that there are not many people that want to hear the negative things about themselves.

I sometimes think that it is because secretly, they already know, but, they don't think anyone else notices it. Seriously. I do think that. But, when you point out the obvious and sometimes, not so obvious, well, you just hurt their pride. But, I can honestly say, I don't feel that way. If you don't like something about me, tell me.

If I have to discipline someone at work, I will tell them right up front what the problem is. I will also finish the conversation with something positive. Because I don't want it to be all about the negative. Or, if they are doing something wrong and I can see a better way, I will tell them what's wrong and pair that with a solution. It seems to be better received.

Is this being a hypocrite? I don't think so. I get it off my chest, but, I want to maintain my positivity, so I try to infuse a little bit of it in there. You may already do this. But, if you don't... You may try it, It may save your sanity.

As an aside, I cannot live without my friends. Friends since I was 5 and I have lived all over the world, but, I just take my friends with me!. That is why God made Skype! I hope that just being exhausted has made you feel like this. You are too nice to be unhappy. ((hugs))

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Oh, thank you for your words and advice! Reading this from a person, who don't know me in person is so nice.

I usually try to have a positive ending to the conversation. Unfortunately, I haven't finished like that in the mentioned argument. So now, while thinking back I just don't feel right. I will have to try and restore the situation. But now I better have to think about how to do it the right way.

Thank you again, and have a nice week ahead!

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Depending on the situation and how comfortable you feel with doing this, if I do not feel like something ended in the correct way or the right way, I will remedy this with an apology, but not for the things that I said, but in the way that I said it. This way you are still saying what you mean but apologizing for the way it was received. But then, you know the situation better and you know what will work. I hope it all works out well because things like this are tricky little situations. Good luck to you and have a wonderful week!

Exactly... I was thinking the same way - apologizing about the way I said it, and not what I said... But do you know what it's so interesting... The fact that I realized men are just so tough on the outside, but when their pride is endangered, then they are the biggest girls in the whole wide world... For me, a man, who can't survive the truth about them isn't the man in the full meaning of the word. 🙄

And thanks. I will need some luck to pack the words for him. 😄 Good night.

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Well, I know the right words will/have come to you. I have found that a lot of men when faced with that situation, are little girls, and bigger whiners.

Just my opinion!

I read all the words. I like to say that I am an optimistic realist. People can and will pull you down if you let them. Be well.

Thanks! I will try to make the most out of this situation...

It is really nice to read a word or two from an optimistic realist from time to time. I usually mainly try to stay strong. But sometimes everything just piles up, and I need to say it out loud.

So thank you for reading through the whole post, and even make me a comment. I am so ashamed I don't find enough time to return all of you the favor and comment your posts. I will try to be better.😇

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Hi @emmania, I think that is good to share what you have in your heart and soul with others. I usually share all my emotions from my day to my hubby. He is a great listener and I feel that after that I am feeling better. In my opinion the best and loyal friends are those who you met in your childhood and university time. We were all open and frank to each other, may be also naive. When adult we became a bit stiff and emotionally we are not so easy touched like before. I can imagine and I see the same situation at my work, people do not tell you in face what they think or if they do not like something but behind the back, I hate it, I usually tell directly no matter what they think, but I warn them in advance. It is hard to work in an environment and to get adopt yourself to it. Just try to think like it is a play and we all the actors just do your job and play your role. Do not let others to irritate you, I hope you cope with that. Take care and all the best for coming week :)

Hi, dear @stef1. Like always your response is long and so meaningful. I must admit, I never thought about my job like role-playing. But apparently, people just want to live a life like that. Not many can accept the critic about them, and I realized that next time, I will have to wrap it up a bit and leave the free speech for my closest who I know they will survive such truth.

And like you said, I also talk about issues with my better half, but this situation was just too much. I was really disappointed with how people changed. How money or the lack of it changed them. And we are not even in the industrial crisis like we were a few years ago...

But enough about that. I will try to use your advice in the future. Thank you again! Have a nice rest of the day.

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Thank you for your warm welcome. It is nice of you to offer yourself to others in case of need. Have a nice rest of the day.

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