How do you cope with death and mourning? #Ulog.

Hello my dear friends. Hope you are having a wonderful Thursday.
My Thursday is nothing what I expected to be. It has been a very strange day. A very sad day, but instead of feeling sad, my feelings turned into anger.


Last night, I heard a devastating news on FB and from my family. One of the most influential, most selfless lady (Betty) who had a huge impact and a huge part of my and my husband's life, who was like a second mom to my husband has passed away.


That was the news I was not expected or would expect to hear, since Betty was only in her early sixties and always very, very active and always moving, never stopping. She has always enjoyed her life by being busy, always moving, never sick, always happy and always helping others.


I don't think that I will ever meet another person in my life like Betty. I met Betty, through my husband (when I met my husband). Betty was my husband's Taekwondo, boxing coach, and also my first boxing, and kickboxing coach. Betty was like a second mom to my husband, since he spent most of his time at her house, mostly watching/talking about boxing, and then eventually about anything.
She fed him, she bought him things he could not afford or even if he could afford she would always want to buy it for him. She paid for his boxing trips, his boxing uniforms etc.
When we were dating she would always be so kind to me and always so welcoming and treated me as a part of her family.
We could go to her with any kind of questions, problems, concerns and she would always be willing to help us.


The thing is that she did not do that only for us, but for all the kids which most were from her boxing club. She would be like a mom to all of us and would always have her doors open to anyone at any time. I don't remember a time when I saw Betty mad, since she would never show her anger/get mad.
She really loved my husband because he would love to spend time with her and just really treat her like his mom, even though she had her own kids to take care of.
Betty kids also loved Alex (my husband) and treated him like their brother. Don't get me wrong, my husband always had a wonderful mother who took a very good care of him, but for some reason he would also build this mom-son relationship with Betty, mostly because they would both love boxing and support each other in it.



Betty is a hero of the Prince George community, who has impacted 1,000 of lives, just by loving everyone and always wanting to help. She never really cared for money, but just loved, loved people.
Betty was also a part of British Columbia Boxing Association, so she was not only very known and popular in Prince George, but all over British Columbia.


We are so heartbroken, since like I said, she really was like a mother to both of us, for many, many years especially our dating years, which she had a huge impact on and that makes it even more special and it really hurts to see such a beautiful person to leave especially when she was always happy and up to few days ago she was helping and impacting many peoples lives with no expectation of nothing in return, just love.


Betty passed away on Nov. 6th, from emergency surgery complications.
My husband is with her family as we speak, until the funeral to pay his deepest respect for the most wonderful person we have known which we will always have in our hearts and so will many others.


So, I am not a very good person with grieving and to tell you the truth I didn't think I would feel like this, really, really heartbroken. It is just sad that we didn't get the chance to really tell her how much she means to us and to say thank you for impacting our lives in the biggest way.
I felt so sad last night and first thing in the morning, that it almost made me feel sick and really miserable.


I felt like, I can't keep on doing this, feeling like this since I'll probably make myself feel sick from being heartbroken, and then all these emotions turned into a little bit of anger from not understanding, why and for what.
I trust God, and I believe God and I know we all have to die one day and God knows exactly when that time is. I know that everything happens for a reason according to Gods plan and I truly believe life in heaven is a true paradise, from my grandpa's experience of dying and coming back to life, and because of that I will never ask, Why? Because I truly trust God who created us and has a plan for all of us. But it still hurts and it still scares me and to tell you the truth, I am not ready for it and it terrifies me and even though I trust God, my feelings still turned into a little anger which was good for me.


When I turn to anger (not a crazy kind of anger), I want to do things especially crank up my music and punch the bags or just any kind of exercise, which turns out to be one of the best workouts since the anger pushes you even harder.




Had a great workout while my anger was giving me more energy.

Right after, I showered, made breakfast, did the laundry, washed the truck, washed the pila (El Salvadorian outside sink), made lunch, washed the shower, went to @joordanzzz soccer game, made dinner and now finally sat down to work on Steemit.
I am glad that I decided to turn to anger, since it kept me busy and keeps me away from crying, from being sad and not doing anything or talking to anyone since I'm heartbroken.
I don't know how long this will last, or if I will just burn out and break down, but what keeps me OK right now is that I truly trust God and that this is the best way for me to deal with this especially being so far away, since I know if I would go to the funeral, it would probably really break me.




Did my laundry.




Washed the truck with @joordanzzz help. I didn't want to stop doing things since I didn't want to think about it anymore. It was a big help, even though you can't really stop thinking about it, but at least keeping myself busy, also kept me concentrating on other things too.




Washed the pila.




Bought some veggies.




Prepared some lunch, before @joordanzzz soccer game. Young potatoes with some butter and onions, some BBQ chicken, tomatoes, cucumbers and tortillas.

My heart goes up to Betty's family and my husband who I chat daily with and who is there right now with Betty's family mourning together. Wish I could be there right now with my husband and the family to support each other.


How do you cope with death and mourning? I don't know how this will sound to people who read this, but I'm a little bit of mess right now trying to cope the best way I know how and that is to know Betty is in heaven right now, she is peaceful and looking over her family and that God is taking care of her right now, and we should be happy for her and that she doesn't want us to be crying and feeling sad, but enjoy and cherish all the moments we had with her and that she always will be a huge part of our lives.


Thank you Betty, for...tears....I don't even have the words since there are no words to explain what a hero, and a truly beautiful Angel you are.
You are the most beautiful and true example of what life is all about and for that, we are forever grateful.
R.I.P Betty Clark.

Hope you had a wonderful Thursday, dear friends and sorry for making this sad post, but I feel like I have to get it out of my chest.
Love @joalvarez

---

Please support @surpassinggoogle for making this community a better place.
Here is the link to his original post, about the #ublog which he has created, so please check it out:
https://steemit.com/ulog/@surpassinggoogle/please-join-in-in-curating-ulog-2029-steemit-posts-on-ulog-in-the-past-few-days-we-are-reshaping-the-internet-with-freshness

---

I am a great supporter of @familyprotection who is working very hard to help the families stay together and this project is the most amazing project that I would suggest for everyone on this steemit community to check it out and support it and by doing it we are helping people in need who are trying to keep their kids safe from being taken away (kidnapped) by the Social Services. Here is the link Click here

---

I am also a part of one of the most amazing projects here on steemit and that is @gratefulvibes project where you can also join @gratefulvibes Discord chat group, where we support the newcomers and just have an amazing time.

---

Thank you for visiting my post. If you like it, please don't forget to Upvote, Follow, and Resteem, it is very, very appreciated. Any suggestions are always very welcome so that I can keep improving in this community.
God Bless!

Image created by my beautiful friend @sunnylife.