A Bite To Eat
I think he is trying to bite your vagina.
At that moment there was a lull in the noisy bustling party and my voice seemed to boom out rather loudly.
The good lady screwed her eyes shut as if in great pain before opening them and replying with a sigh.
Don't be so crude, Daddy-Bear. He is definitely not trying to bite me. Our little man doesn't bite does he?
She addressed this last bit to our grinning son. The little boom, who was grabbing at her thighs.
We were at a friend's kids fifth birthday party. I found myself intensely disliking the birthday girl in question for having a birthday on a Sunday when I wanted nothing more than to sit in my house idly scratching at my left testicle.
The party house was bedlam. The little boom had managed to get a hold of some chocolate and was adding to the chaos, lurching from place to place throwing, grabbing and now of course what looked to me like biting.
He definitely looked like he was going to bite you on...
The good lady sliced a hand through the air to cut me off before I could say the vagina word again.
He doesn't bite, Daddy-Bear. You should know that. Pfft.
She shook her head bemusedly at the onlookers as if to say. Men, such stupid creatures.
I really think he was, it's all the sugar. He has become demented.
The good lady directed a look at me which would have turned a lesser man to stone.
Instead, I turned to the nearby table and picked up a coffee that some grubby little capsule machine had spat out, the host insisting I would never be able to tell the difference between it and a real coffee.
I could. It was shit.
OWWWW!! LITTLE MAN!?! NO BITING!?!
I turned back.
The good lady was admonishing our little boom, who was now wailing and thrashing in her arms.
What is it?
I inquired.
The good lady winced as she bought him over to me and dumped him in my arms. Then she hissed in my ear.
The wee bugger just bit me right in the bloody vagina!?
I did my best not to look awfully smug
I don't think I managed very well.
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It's a conspiracy !
As true as it apparently was, not everything needs a loud commentary.
Like father, like son. LOL !!!
I'd he is lucky he will get the good bits from me and skip the loud bits, lol!!
LMFAO!!! Little boomy bush biter! LOLOL!! This post made my day!!
He's terrible for it. He is sort of at that height where he runs towards her and tilts his head back and just bites! Lol!
One day, he will grow up to be a cunning linguist. (Did I spell that right 🤔)
You did spell it right, top marks!!! :0)
Sounds like he'll be entertaining many cunning stunts in the future!
Haha, yes, perhaps a tad.
Or end up in the old pokey for all that biting!!!
I hereby sentence you to 6 years for vadge biting - uncommon, but possible!
Lol, I will have to save up all my steems for his constant bail money requirements!!
you know if you said I told you so she would most likely crack your head...lol
good thing he didn't come at you with those chompers or he may be your last boom...lol
upvoted and resteemed
Haha!! Thankfully he only seems to get crotch bitey with the ladies!! Hehe
@meesterboom hello dear friend.
What a horror when you are saying something inappropriate and the noise is dry and your words echo in the silence, it has happened to me many times and the worst that everyone looks at you as if you never said a bad word in your life.
I also hated the birthdays of my children's friends, they always celebrate weekends, they ruin the place to stay at home lying on the couch, for that reason I asked that the birthday of the rainy years so I could avoid them
Great bite turned out ¨The small boom¨
I wish you a good start, dear friend
It happens to me oh so many times. It's like I am fated to speak and everyone go silent. So, the only way is up!
a chip off the old block. Although, your Mum and Dad aren't on steem it to prove it,
He is learning, at an extremely early age, to be like Dad, bite a box a day.
he just hasn't learned discretion yet.
Discretion will come, lol
Not only are you a coffee connoisseur but a fortune teller as well. There is nothing worse when people say you won't be able to tell the difference as you normally will then. It kind of highlights how good the real stuff is .
I think people say it because subconsciously they already know that the difference is obvious and they are hoping to convince tensors l themselves!
Delishes Sunday, Yupiiiiii!
Yipeeyaiay!! :0D
When you have had too much chocolate and it is presented right there at eye-level, what else can a fella do!
Hahaha!! Exactly, he couldn't help himself!!
Seems perfectly understandable to me. Too much chocolate tends to have that effect on me too. ya just never know......
It's true, chocolate is a game changer in life!