Life Lessons of 2018

December is almost here and, ufff, what a year it was 2018! I can say that this year has been one of the most intense that I have lived in my short life. I know that I’m still very young and inexperienced and I still have a lot to live, but definitely when I grow up and look back I’ll remember this year as one of the most important, decisive and transcendental of my life.

The truth is that this year I’ve gone through hard things that I never thought would happen to me.

Even so, I don’t have to despise or ignore all the good things that happened to me this year too, all the joys and, above all, the valuable life lessons that left me the good as well as the bad moments, from that point of view no experience has been negative, because through them I have been able to learn things that will continue to be useful for the rest of my life.

Photo by Morgan Sessions on Unsplash

Today I want to share with you some of these lessons on which I have been reflecting and I will continue working to put them into practice every day. I know that they may seem obvious to you, because in reality they are things that in theory we all know, phrases that we have all heard and even repeated many times, but to which we may not have paid much attention, until life impacts us with situations and circumstances that are beyond our control, in which we have to really understand their meaning and importance. Many times they are things that life has reiterated to us again and again, and in fact we need it to be like that to understand, because, being honest, I don’t know about you, but I have not been the brightest at times of making important decisions, in fact, I often end up messing up, but committing those mistakes is also part of the learning process. That’s why I will mention them anyway, while I’m telling you a little about my experience.

Photo by Aziz Acharki on Unsplash

1. A few months ago I undertook a long journey, having to get away from my family. Now I live thousands of miles away from them, and although there have always been many problems in my family an many times I didn’t know how to get away and wanted to flee, with them there were also wonderful moments, with them I grew up and thanks to them I am who I am. Now I think I would have liked to be able to take a healthy distance from those problems and make my life without having to physically get away from them, but the situation was forced, it had to be this way due to the crisis that my country, Venezuela, is experiencing, thanks to this I had to leave everything behind, the place where I was born, that saw me grow, and all my surroundings, family and Friends. I know I’ll see them again soon, and it is a relief to be able to make use of the internet and the web to keep in touch with them every day, but now in the distance, I miss them, and I have thought a lot about all the times I was with them physically but with my mind elsewhere, maybe trying to solve my problems, and not enjoying the moment with them. Of course I also remember all the good times I had with them, in which I was completely present, and those memories give me joy, but I know I didn’t give importance to other small moments, which maybe were very of the day-to-day, and for that reason they seemed insignificant, and they were not. Every moment you spend with your loved ones matters and it is worth living them with your mind centered on the present.
   Now from the distance I appreciate every interaction that I can have with them through chats, social networks, remote video calls, and I will always dedicate to that the time that is necessary to continue being present in their lives.

Photo by Joshua Clay on Unsplash

1. Not everything about my immigration process has been a source of tears. The truth is: it has been an adventure. I’ve met wonderful new people, people who have given me a helping hand, who have cared for me, and this is quite surprising since I just met them, but even more surprising is to find a friend in people who I already knew but with whom I didn’t know I could count in this way. This has left me impressed. Until recently I underestimated the importance that some people could have in my life, and I put too many expectations in other relationships that in the end did not come to anything. In this case it applies that phrase"do not judge a book by its cover" and I will add something more: Surround yourself with good, kind, nice people, with whom you share likes and interests and can hold long talks, work as a team and give each other mutual support, and at the beginning, when you are meeting someone, do not hurry to judge and dismiss the person because you do not like some superficial detail in the first impression, or in the first impressions, GIVE YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO REALLY KNOW PEOPLE IN DEPTH IF THEY ARE WILLING TO KNOW YOU TOO. NEVER GO TO THE OTHER EXTREME ADDING TOO MANY PRESSURE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS BY PUTING TOO MANY EXPECTATIONS ABOUT THE PERSON.

Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

1. The last lesson is about something I have heard all my life: AS YOU DO NOT LOVE YOURSELF YOU CAN NOT LOVE ANYONE. Who has not heard this phrase? I thought I understood it, until recently I went through a very painful breakup and I realized I never really had it clear.
   I just came out of a fairly long relationship, which I realized very late that it was based on a rather toxic dynamic. Why? Because he and I were very young and immature when we started dating and because neither of us had a healthy self-esteem. I felt a very intense love for this person, but during all that time I was increasingly neglecting myself, in the last stage of the relationship I melted so much with him that I forgot who I was and what was best for me, in every area of my life everything revolved around my life with him. Because all this, everything came to the end in a rather stormy way for me, at that point my self-esteem was more deteriorated. But as I say, not everything has been bad, now I'm a little clearer in the aspects of myself I have to work on to improve my life and move on. In all the time that relationship lasted I did a lot of damage to myself, but I also got to know many characteristics and peculiarities of myself that I didn’t know, which is of vital importance. And this was what I learned, LOVE YOURSELF FIRST AND THEN YOU WILL BE ABLE TO SHARE THAT LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE. I plan to make another post where I will talk more about all this.

Photo by Joey Nicotra on Unsplash

In summary, these were the most impressive lessons that the year 2018 has left me. Thank you very much for reading my post, I hope it is useful for you in your lives. Do not hesitate to leave a comment if you want to share something about what your year has been like and what you have learned from it, I would like to read your stories as well. If you are going through a difficult stage right now, I remind you that calm comes after the storm, everything will pass and then you will have the peace necessary to reflect on everything that happened, learn from what you have lived, recharge your energies and continue Go ahead! So cheer up!
I send you a virtual hug.