Fiance in Islam - Terms and Law
Fiance in Islam - Terms and Law
Today who doesn't know the term fiance? Yes, fiance means binding someone before marrying their partner through the proposal process or application procession. Couples who want to get married are usually preceded by getting engaged and fiance is considered as the first step to reach the goal of marriage in Islam. The man will come to apply for the woman both alone and with his family and make a mutual agreement about the marriage marriage plan both officially and in a siri marriage. In terms of fiance terms actually long known. In Islam, proposes to a woman and ties her in a relationship called khitbah. To find out more about the law and other matters concerning fiancee in Islam see the following explanation
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Understanding and Terms of Sermon
Khitbah or what is known as wedging means a man who comes to ask a woman to be his wife, in ways that are generally applicable in the community. Furthermore, if the woman receives a proposal from the man then the couple is declared engaged. After getting engaged, usually the couple will take care of the marriage preparation at KUA. In carrying out khitbah or applications there are two conditions that must be met, namely:
- Requirements for mustahsinah
The mustahsinah condition is a condition that encourages men to examine first the woman who will be invited or preached. This requirement includes conditions that are not required before asking someone. A person's sermon remains valid even without fulfilling the requirements of mustahsinah. For a man he needs to see the nature and appearance of a woman who will be asked whether he meets the criteria of a good wife and according to the Prophet's recommendations in the following hadith:
The woman is married because of four things, because her wealth, her offspring, her beauty, and because of her religion, will maintain your hand. ”(HR Abu Hurairah)
Based on the hadith, men should pay attention to the religion of the woman, heredity, the position of the woman (whether according to him), the nature of love and gentle, and healthy physical and spiritual.
2). Common conditions
What is meant by common conditions is a requirement that must be fulfilled before the request is made and if it is not done then the proposal or fiance is invalid. Common requirements include
Women who are invited are not in the hands of other men as explained in the following hadith
"Do not someone from you propose (a woman) who is favored by his brother, so that the previous person has left him or has allowed him." (HR Abu Hurairah)
The woman who is in the iddah talak raj'i. The woman who is in the talak of raj'i is still referring to her husband and it is recommended not to be invited before the end of her iddah period and does not decide to contain or make up with her ex-husband. As the word of Allah SWT in Sura Al Baqarah verse 228
And her husbands have the right to refer to it in the waiting period, if they (husbands) want ishlah. "(Al-Baqarah: 228)
A woman who is left dead by her husband and in the iddah period or who practices the dream of divorce may be invited with sarcasm or kinayah. This is in accordance with the word of Allah SWT in Al qur'an surat Al baqarah verse 235
And there is no sin for you to woo women with sarcasm or you hide (the desire to marry them) in your heart. Allah knows that you will mention them, in that case do not make a promise to marry them in secret, except to just say (to them) the words that are good. (Al-Baqarah: 235)
Fiance Law in Islam
According to most scholars, fiancee are categorized as preliminaries or preparations before marriage and doing khitbah or proposals that bind a woman before marriage her law is permissible, as long as the conditions of khitbah are fulfilled. The fiancée or khitbah is allowed in Islam because the purpose of the engagement or fiance is simply to know the willingness of the woman who is invited as well as a promise that the man will marry the woman. Like the following hadith:
If you want to propose to a woman, and are able to see from her what drives her to marry her, then do it. "(HR. Imam Ahmad and Abu Dawud)
The hadith explains that Islam allows men to make a proposal to a woman and tie her to an engagement rope but if this is in accordance with Islamic law. After carrying out the engagement, the woman remains unlawful for the man and both are not allowed to see each other, gather together or do things that are forbidden which can plunge into acts of adultery. This is in accordance with article 11 of Islamic compilation law concerning legal consequences from the khitbah or fiance who mentioned that:
Pinangan has not caused legal consequences and the parties are free to terminate the relationship of interest. The freedom to decide the relationship of interest is carried out in a good manner in accordance with the guidelines and local customs, so that harmony and mutual respect are maintained.
The law gives engagement gifts
When engaged we often hear the term ring exchange, then how is the law in Islam? Actually ring exchange habits can be just a habit, but a man is allowed to give a gift or souvenir to his fiancee or what is referred to as urf. If in the future the man cancels the engagement or his proposal then he is not allowed to take the prize back. As the hadith of the Prophet Muhammad SAW mentioned that
It is not lawful for a Muslim to give someone to another person then ask him or her to return, except for giving his father to his child "(HR. Ahmad al-irba'ati wa shohihu al-Tirmidhi wa ibnu hibban wa al-Hakim)
The law cancels the engagement
Fiancee or proposal is only the promise of a man who will marry a woman and is the first step in preparing a marriage. Based on this, the engagement can actually be decided or canceled by one of the parties, for example if there is a conflict in the family.
however, if the fiance is canceled by the woman, it is good for the dowry given by the man to be returned. Even so, a man who has promised a woman should fulfill his promise because not a Muslim must fulfill his promise as stated in the Qur'an Al-Qur'an verse 34
"And fulfill the promise; Surely the promise must be held responsible ".
Such is the explanation of the law and matters related to fiancee in Islam. We recommend that before marriage we know in advance the criteria for a good potential partner and how to choose a companion to live in Islam for example by means of ta'aruf not by dating. If you don't get a mate, then don't despair because it can cause the heart to become restless, stay patient and pray to God to be blessed with a good soul mate.