**Gone for so long - Part ONE**

Hello, my friends its time for me to finally speak up … It was horror in these few months. I really don’t know where to begin…
First thing first…I am BACK and that is important…For me…because I can write again and I can finally relax and tell you what happened….
So 2018 is gone and I was sure 2019 will be my year…no more sickness no more bad feeling no more stress just me and my husband having fun and doing something new (and old ) to achieve our dreams… That was the plan…and it was looking good… till January 15… And then came the first disaster…My job was really great…I was working for Amazon and we have a lot of platforms to work on…I mean US, AU, EU, ES, and so on…But then in December, they close our platform for US..and that was the most profitable Platform…So they began to fire people. In my office was always more than 6 people and then in 2 weeks, they fired 3…So we have a lot of work to do ( You are working for 2 people at once ) It was hard but we have fun because time go faster when you have a lot to do… So 2 weeks later my co-worker called me in another office. So I came and there was our boss too…I was sure it finally came time for my promotion…I was really nervous but happy at the same time…we are sitting and I smile…And then he started to talk… I am sorry but we need to let people go…You are unfortunately next…I was in shock…wait a minute…Am I fired? Are you serious? They were still talking but I didn’t listen anymore…I was just staring in the wall and I kept tears in order not to start crying in front of them. My only question was if this is because of my health condition…and, of course, they said no…I didn’t say anything more…just Ok that’s it… They said maybe in 6 weeks they will find something else for me ( You stay for 6 weeks for your contract to expire ) but that means you still need to work for 6 weeks… So you were fired but you still need to work ?! Are you crazy? So I came back to our office and I just say to my co-workers that I'm leaving because I got fired…They all just stared… Wait what are you talking about? Are you fucking serious, the fired you? But why you? We have so many people that are always late, they don’t know anything about this job, so who will be working that? I just said you all know why they let me go…. My boss said you can go now and tomorrow we will talk about that and we will explain everything…I called my husband and I just say please pick me up, I just got fired and he just said I will be right there. I sat in the car and I started crying…really crying... I have never been fired anywhere by now, so I was not used to it… My husband just said please stop you know you did a got job and they are assholes…They don’t know what they lost…and you will find another job, better job… But I was crying and crying... This was a really great job… how will I ever find something good like this…( shock day so I was really depressed and I didn't think positive one this day ). When we came home my first thing was the shower. I seat under the shower for about 40 min to calm myself and then bed. I just needed to sleep. When I woke up my first thought was fuck yesterday really happen but I am strong and I will not show to my co-workers how hard is that for me. So I came to the office with a big smile on my face and of course, the whole firm already knows what happened so they all looked at me with sad faces. Not cool man, please don’t look at me like that or I will start crying. We set down with my boss to clear some things. They gave me two options. First one is that I can use the rest leave and then I no longer have to get in, or the second one that I stay for 6 weeks and after that my work ends. I said, that I need time to think so I will stay home for 3 days (leave) to decided what to do. Of course, they said yes. I wasn’t sure what option will I take, so I started to clean my desk ( just in case ). Next day, I wasn’t sad anymore, ok I was sad but I was angry too. What the hell people, you are firing sick people. I am not dumb, I know why I needed to go, so please don’t lie. I stayed home all day because I wasn’t sure what to do. And then in the evening, I started to feel dizzy, started to sweat and my head hurt like hell. Time for bed. It was even worse in the morning. My head still hurt and I got a fever. I was sick. Great, my thinking time didn’t start well. I went to the doctor and she said I need to stay at home for about a week. I called my boss to tell her what is wrong and that I am going to tell her how I have decided when I come back. Of course, everybody thought that I'm playing but I didn’t care.

And then the next day disaster happened….

END OF PART ONE!

I will soon be back with part two of course.

Have a nice day and till the next post 😊🦋🦋

with love, @tinabrezpike