Be careful of so-called marriage counselors online

in #marriage6 years ago (edited)

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It has become a trend, that unknown peoples, with unverified matrimonial tales, purportedly send their stories to some social media influencers - especially Facebook, and especially ladies - to post those tales so that the confused can gain vital advise.
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Then from all corners of the planet come a good serving of insults, with very little advise as dessert... all after an appetizer of debunk-ment.
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The tragedy of this trend, me thinks, is not for the seeker at the time, but for all the young ones who are... not liking, not commenting... but lapping it all up, getting misguided practical guides for the little stress points that are bound to show up in their own future homes.
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I wonder if we're in order to leave the custodianship of the matrimonial institution in the hands of trigger-happy individuals who, when they take their vows, say, "for better, for best; for richer, for richest, till unpalatable circumstances do us part"?!
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There is the counter argument presented by, especially this new generation of wives; they say marriage is nothing to die for. Yet, there is an increasing craze to get married. I still see pre-wedding shots all over the place; bridal shower; bachelorette party; baby shower name them... all leading up to the altar where they take the same vows their parents took and lived together all their lives.
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I am against blackmail in any guise. If there are things you won't take in a marriage, then take vows that give you wiggle room. Or take no vows at all. It is the same thing as young men who progress through the seminary wanting to be priests, only to get there and start a campaign for priests to be allowed to marry because celibacy is the next thing after impossible. But you knew!!!
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In any case, individuals who post marriage cases and generate hundreds of opinions should be careful. In any average primary school, a hundred parents, two hundred kids; no parent wants to give his/her children to the next parent to train, because they believe no one can do a better job than they. But if there are parameters set, and people get thorough training in them, then they can be teachers on parenting.

@Ogoowinner expresses how she feels about it below

After failed relationships, most sad individuals(male and female) become relationship counselors online. Some are married but unsatisfied because they married for the wrong reasons
Eg, money, fame, power or beauty
At the end, they become unfaithful to their partners
They seek happiness outside
They may have all the wealth , fame and beautiful woman, but they are empty deep down

Influencers, advisers, insulters, facebookers... what training have you got to be marriage counselors? There could be, somewhere, a compendium of all the pieces of advice on various aspects of marriage from social medias... Two young people in love and preparing to get married pick it up to read and gain wisdom. Oh, what confusion they'll gain!
Young couples, don't let anyone deceive you. True love still exists. I know it's hard to find. But it exists. Always love, respect and trust in your relationship. Don't damage your relationship by listening to the advice of sad/unhappy individuals.

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Social media marriage counselors are now taking things overboard.

To be a marriage counselor, you need to be trained objectively, your experience either good or bad is not enough.
We are dealing with humans here, so you don't come out of nowhere and think you know it all

In the end everyone wants to be selfish and no one wants to really love

Most importantly, NEVER go to a Doctor with an asterix over their name.

Thanks dear. You did well by clearing a lot of misconceptions.

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