Marriage

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Maturity is very important in marriage. It helps you deal with things better, see things better and relate better. It is an important element every marriage should have, because no one expects you to be throwing tantrums as you did when you were younger or single. Getting our acts together helps a lot and it speaks a lot about how far we have grown.

What is expected of couples in marriage?

One: You need to consistently and continually learn about your partner. Marriage expects continuous learning about your partner, till you die. It’s a life-long institution, so everyday you continue to learn about them. If you date for 10 years, you can't learn all you need to learn about them. Marriage magnifies your inward trait which you have long buried, if left unchecked.

Two: You need to act mature. Both parties need to act like adults because marriage isn't for babies. Marriage expects couples to deal with issues like adults. You are no longer babies. You are not expected to allow minor disagreements to escalate, and you need to do away with your pride. Letting go of minor issues help too. Love is not blind, it only choose to ignore.

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Three: Humility. Marriage insists (note that word: insist) both parties must be humble. You are to avoid the trap of pride. Never exalt yourself higher than your partner, regardless of your roles. You are to remain humble, and it breeds better understanding.

Four: Resolved quarrels. Marriage expect quarrels to be resolved on time. Don't sleep over issues. You can't always sweep everything under the rug. You need to address issues head on. When you leave issues unattended to, it breeds unresolved quarrels which ultimately destroy marriage.

Five: Communications. You have to communicate. Start a project together if you are struggling to communicate. Marriage expects communication. You need to be able to communicate. You communicate your feelings, you communicate your needs, and only then can your partner understands what they need to do to please you. Speaking about your thoughts and gists too, fosters bond. You need to be able to communicate at all levels in marriage. Your ability to communicate fosters better bonding.

Six: Understanding. This is very vital. It makes sacrifice a bit easier. Marriage expects understanding. Both parties need to understand each other. You need to know when to push and when not to. You need to know what excite your partner and what puts them off, because misunderstandings have the potential to destroy any marriage. When you understand each other, there are some arguments that would be avoided.

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Seven: Accommodation. Accommodate each other's differences. Marriage expects accommodation. Both parties are imperfect and because both are imperfect, they cannot dwell together if they cannot accommodate each other. Both need to make allowances for each other's errors.

...to be continued...

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