RELATIONSHIP TIPS ; HOW TO KEEP FRIENDS!

Last weekend was just simply lovely as we saw how to make friends and the interesting part of it is, as I went through it again and again, it was just an amazing blessing to me. Yep! This weekend, we shall be looking into How to Keep Friends.

Source

You see, the process of having friends (good ones at that) isn't complete by just making them, one would have to keep them before one can say that he or she has a friend. I have seen and read and I know for sure that if a person wants to be in your life as a good friend, they will make obvious efforts to do so.

Likewise if one doesn't want to remain a friend to you, they would show it in their actions, although some might pretend about it and try to hide it when they speak to you. From their attitude though you can get the message they're passing across.

If we want to keep someone as a friend we cannot hide the fact that we want to keep them as friends. Our desire to have them remain our friends will show somehow. Keeping friends requires some basic attributes which include care, humility, openness etc. Now let's take a closer look at some salient ways to help us keep good friends.

1) KNOW YOU:

To an extent, the ability to be able to attract and keep friends depends on your kind of person. Chances are you will attract your kind. If you're the type of person who cares a lot about just yourself, if you're selfish and self centered, then I assure you that you cannot keep good friends.Evil company corrupts good manners. Simply because they don't want to be corrupted, good mannered people won't want to stay with you if you're ill in your manners.

A selfish person is seriously ill in their manners towards others. Good people won't want to stay around such a person. Maybe they can manage being friends with you from a distance but not close friends. A selfish person cannot be a good friend and cannot be trusted in the time of adversity. So, keeping good friends has a lot to do first of all with your character and the personality you have settled for.

Source

2) ALWAYS TELL THE TRUTH: This is one way of keeping good friends. A good friend is a person who can stick up their head for you in danger. Such friendship thrives on telling the truth. Many people desire that others stay truthful to them but they themselves cannot be depended upon to be truthful. You weaken the bonds of friendship when you're deceitful and full of falsehood.

Lies do not strengthen friendships. It actually destroys friendships.

Some people take pleasure in not being straight. They lie so frequently that they have become branded as untrustworthy. Even when they're not outrightly lying, they are also not telling the real truth. They just are unnecessarily shady. That's a pathetic way to live! People want to know that your words are true. People want to know that you're dependable. People want to know that if they take your words to the bank they won't be disappointed. When these expectations are dashed, people begin to withdraw from you.

Source

We can take this a step further by reminding ourselves that God's Word is the truth. If you're a person that always has a Word-of-God-approach in your speech to every matter, your friends will greatly value your company and will always desire to be with you because from your mouth you'll be constantly solving the issues of their lives.

3) COMMUNICATE OFTEN:

The more we talk to our friends, the more we get to know who they really are, their likes and dislikes, their attitude to life, what their values are, what their goals and ambitions are, what they have in their hearts and the more we eliminate the wrong ideas we had preconceived about them.

Every friendship is only as deep and as strong as the communication is between the persons involved.

Source

It's no doubt that frequent communication helps friendships get stronger. You know, people also have preconceived notions about you too but the more they talk with you, the more they realise that you're not the way they thought, that they really enjoy your company and want to hang around you.

If you want to keep a person as your friend, then you should make the effort to stay in touch. Talk to them, call them, send SMSes, send them gifts etc. Just keep the communication line open.

4) BE A GOOD LISTENER:

I remember having a friend back then when I was in school that I cherished so much. We got talking about the things we did that made us good friends and what we had to work upon. I was shocked to hear from her that I wasn't so much of a listener and that really got me because prior to that time, I thought I had done everything to make her glad I was her friend. However, I soon learnt that being a listener doesn't just mean hearing (that is, allowing the person talk), rather it means being attentive to what they say, remembering what they said and offering solutions and help when needed.

Being a good listener demonstrates and proves your care for a friend. It encourages them to find a shoulder in you to lean on. It shows them they can trust you. When we pay attention to people and allow ourselves understand what they are saying, we are telling that person that he/she is important. This is vital in keeping your friends.

5) PAY VISIT:

I have seen that usually most people do not want to leave their comfort zones. How many people these days still will think of putting themselves through some inconvenience just because they want to visit someone else for no personal benefit at all? I've found that as people get older they seem to get stiffer.

Source

When we were kids we had more friends. The reasons are obvious. It was a norm then to visit friends and just have a good time. We'd play together and just check on one another. Now however, we lie to ourselves that we're too busy to make out time to visit people but we have time to follow gossips on TV and keep track of all kind of stuff that do not translate into anything that has true virtue. We are busy but yes, we can make out time for what's important.

People are important.

If you're really too busy to visit people, then you really should adjust your schedule because you're missing out on life. Jesus, the greatest leader that ever was, was a very busy person yet He had the time to visit the houses of His disciples, the houses of friends like Lazarus and even people like Zacchaeus.

6) BE A COVER:

As someone who wants to keep friends, you ought to learn to defend your friends. See good in them and don't join others to put them down. As a matter of fact, you should rebuke those who do such in your presence. Defend the interests of your friends. Love in your heart will make you act as a cover to them. You won't judge them and condemn them when they go wrong, rather in love you'll correct and embrace them.

Being a cover to them means that in spite of their short comings, failures, weaknesses and flaws, you love them and assist them. It means that you still identify with them even when all isn't well with them. If you're this kind if person, then you're a cover to your friends and just as no one throws off a blanket on a very cold night, your friends won't want to lose you because people like you are rare in this present world.

These are the few points we'll address today but there are many more things that can be shared along this line of keeping friends. I trust however that these have fanned the fire already in your hearts and have planted good seeds in you. In everything you do remember that life isn't worth living except we live it in the context of LOVE

I Remain @thelovejunkie, Your Steemit Love Coach With A Difference a.k.a Love Doctor

Join Us On AIR-CLINIChere