I Know a Girl Who Says Bon Jovi isn't Shit, So I am Pointing Out Why She is Wrong.steemCreated with Sketch.

in #music5 years ago

So this article is way different from anything I would normally write, but someone had the audacity to defend Bon Jovi in my presence, so I am here to explain in detail why she is wrong. I am going to do this by yelling about Livin' on a Prayer. I pick this song because it is possibly the worst Bon Jovi song I have ever heard, and considering his legacy that is saying something.

I will say the first verse isn't actually all that bad, it just paints a quick picture of a couple in love who aren't making much money due to a union strike of some kind, and that's actually a pretty okay opening. Nothing great, and certainly, something that has been done better, but it's passable.

Then we get on to the Bridge (Well the part that leads into the Chorus from the verse, I don't know for sure if that's what it is called). And oh boy, this does not get off to a good start.

'She says we've got to hold on, to what we got. It doesn't make a difference if we make it or not'

Okay, right off any goodwill that had been built up has been flushed right down the drain. If it doesn't make a difference if you make it or not, why do you got to hold on to it all? What importance is there in what you are holding on to if there is no difference in the outcome? I'll get back to this point, but it plays into part of why this is such a terrible song. On to the next line of the Bridge.

“We Got each other, and That's a lot for love”

I am starting to think this life of theirs is crumbling to pieces because this man is an idiot. Having each other is kind of the bare minimum for a relationship, so no. That's not a lot for love, at all. If you had any less then that, you would have nothing. Do you know who also 'has each other'? People who are trapped in a loveless marriage. So, to be quite honest, having each other isn't even the bare minimum, it's not even enough to reach the bare minimum. Now on to the chorus.

'Oh, We're halfway there, livin' on a prayer'

As previously established, they are not even at the minimum. They are poor, and as we will find out in the second verse things are about to get even worse for them. Whatever he is claiming to be 'halfway' to, he is almost certainly not. A good relationship? I barely see any signs of a decent relationship here. A successful and fulfilling life? Well coupled with the next verse and the fact he already seems like an idiot, I really doubt that is going to happen.

Now, to Paraphrase the next verse, he gives up on his own creative dreams and sells his six-string guitar, and his lady is now crying herself to sleep at night wishing she could run away from it all. But our hero assures her that one day it'll be alright. And then we just go back to the bridge and chorus, and that's it.

It's like they wanted a song for all those people struggling through hard times, but didn't really understand people who were in these situations. All he really has to offer them is flowery words that don't mean anything and these empty proclamations of love that aren't even over the top enough to get to Journey's level of cheese that makes them so great. These lyrics just sound like they are coming from a guy who has no idea about the topic he is actually trying to sing about.

And the topic is weird when you consider Bon Jovi's attempts at this souring and uplifting chorus and music, all while giving you no reason to actually be hopeful for the people he's singing about in his lyrics. I mean come to the end of the song they are in a worse position then they were at the start. I thought that maybe that was the point, that they wanted a contrast of music and lyrics to illustrate some kind of point, but the only thing that would mean is he is saying the people in the song are being delusional that their goal is even attainable. And to be fair, I really don't think that is what he is going for, it makes far more sense that the lyrics are just terrible.

Bon Jovi is a Rock act that can't rock, they occasionally try to write songs with some kind of theme or meaning but never really grasp the things they write about, and for the life of me I do not understand how they have had such a long career.

Anyway, I've had fun from my little break from Games and Anime, but it's time to get back. Hopefully, I'll have a review of Atelier Lulua in a few days for you.

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If it just comes to the lyrics many artists use texts and phrases that does not make sense.
But that is how people are. Clinging to the last piece of shit they have because it is there last hope.

So if you lost everything you tell yourself you are still alive and have so much to be grateful for.

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