The land under

in #payitforward5 years ago

Its not easy being back in Australia. A few years ago, I did visit the country and my trip was an unpleasant one. Mainly because I met people who were very mean to me. A part of me wanted to apologize and say that perhaps, I just wanted to have you guys on my side but the thing is, that's how they treated me. I cannot say that I am sad or perhaps happy that finally, these people are within striking distance and are therefore vulnerable. If I am going to describe the way I felt when I was boarding off the plane, its this: its peace that finally I can redeem myself.

I am aware that some of you guys are very much curious on what this person had done to me and all I can say was that she was like this-

There were times when I would have considered hiring one of this

to get back on that creature and on her family.

There were moments when I would have wanted to stalk and post threats in her social media accounts- just to let her know that I am watching her and I can strike anytime.

There were also those times when I would have hired a

to curse that person into a miserable life.

And there were also those days when I despaired for everything to end because, it hurts a lot!

Going through my days then was very difficult and even now that I am writing this, the memory itself refreshes those desperate and difficult times. I would have given a complete description on how those desperate moments were but, were I am now, its not really that important.

Starting up after that fiasco seems to be initially impossible. There were a lot of issues that needed to be resolved. Emotional baggages that needed to be sorted out and, my unending desire to get back on that creature is simply too hard to forget.

I am innately a very peaceful person but what this creature did is simply too difficult to forget or even to forgive. But when I watched this inspirational video


copyright by QuestioVerum2010

my perception in life changed.

The years I spent trying to build a life in Australia, a mean person destroyed in a matter of weeks. The money I invested for my future, this bad person took away. My integrity as a human being was taken away by this person when she claimed that I am a liar, I am stupid, I do not deserve anything and, I am a big fake. The worst part, she was gas lighting. Yes. I am within my rights to take revenge and make this creature's life miserable for the rest of her years. But, I did not do so because, there will always be mean people in this world. There will always be those people who would always enjoy ruining somebody else's life. There will always be creatures who feel that they are superior- set apart from the rest of the world.

I did not recover instantly. Even now that I am telling my story, a part of me still hurts. But, I also have the courage to stand up and continue with my journey. What this person destroyed irreparably, I slowly repaired and built. When this creature thought that she had seen the last of me, I will prove her wrong.

Because, as Mother Teresa had been saying, its not between her or me. Its not even between me or you or any other creatures. It is between me and my god. Or, for those who does not believe in one, its between me and myself. I do not want to spend the rest of my days hating, being angry and forever complaining that this creature ruined everything.

Yes. She ruined everything in my life then. But, I do have the courage and strength to go on and on. She must have thought that she won the war already but in fact, she only won a battle. For me, as long as I am living, there is hope, there is always change and that's something that she was not able to take away from me.

I still hate her when I remember the things that she did but, I would simply chalk that out as the remaining journey for my recovery and healing. I would have planned to get back on that creature and, make my threats a reality but, I stopped.

The best revenge that I unknowingly executed was that, I was able to move through life despite the oppositions- better and happier.

She still does not know that I am in Australia and, I simply don't care if she would find out about it because, I will not be the person who would keep looking back fearfully thinking that her bad deeds had finally caught on her.

I am not completely at peace yet but, at least, I am happy where I am now knowing that I have come through that difficult journey and I am better. I am happier.

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Dear Ann what hurt you in the past ( or who ) cant hurt you in the now and near future. I wish you strenght and Well and we are glad you are with us! Good luck and @teamaustralia I think Will open you with open arms like All steemians do
X
Britt

Thanks Britt! I definitely appreciate that. I think all of us have stories to share- one way or another and, that's what makes people keep coming back to us- they can relate to our posts.

Well yes, but also to give others a good feeling they are not alone

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It looks like you still have healing to do
Do not let someone else to define who you are.

Yes @wolfhart and, no matter what I do, I have to be determined enough to fight for it.

Fight smart if you have to fight at all. And on your terms

Coming from you- and I consider you an expert on this, I would seriously take this advice. Thanks.

I cannot say that I understand how you feel...because that would be lying. But I do understand how frustrated you are and how "played" you feel.

Time will heal everything. I am so happy that you didnt take any drastic measure that you would either regret in the future or never let you get peace.

Honestly, its difficult not to take drastic measures but, I realized that if I did proceed on doing anything crazy, I might end up in a worst place out there.

I'm glad you are picking yourself up. It's not easy to take revenge but it sure is a lot harder NOT to!!!

I hope you never have those kind of troubles again...

Can you tell what is the main difference between the country you came from and the one you are now? What do you miss the most?

I miss eating rice the most and of course, my dog! But, I have to make a lot of sacrifices in order for me to get to the next stage of my journey and that is, being a nurse in this country.

Why the hell I keep thinking to match both of you in the real life @trincowski and @nurseanne84?

I even made a special prays for that to becone true 😊

You are not alone Girl! I'm with you @nurseanne84. If that bitch ever considered to do something bad again on you.. Let me do your part on destroying her social media life 😊 I Meant it!

By the way.. I like it how you try to cope the hatred inside😉 you should thing about a sweet revenge like become a better person than her and be a great helper when she's kissing the ground. You have the right to be happy and living peacefully. Don't let her create a miserable life on you just by thinking for what she did to you.

Time will heal!

Honestly, I do not know. But I started with thinking what would happen if I did go on with my revenge like, I assaulted her or, destroyed her life. Will I be happy after? Will the memory of the pain that I felt vanish? Or, will I dance and caper around saying- yeah! revenge is sweet!

Thank you very much for your offer and, let me know how long the offer lasts in case I change my mind?

I would like to go beyond the whole- I will get you and you will be sorry concept. Have I forgiven that person? I am still on that journey. But, I have to do some other thing as well like, making sure that I become a better person in the process and not a bitter, very angry and corrupted version of me as a result of this person's deeds!

you have the right to feel like that.. but I think making another prestise by being the best and loveable foreign nurse is better than thinking of the revenge..
hey.. You're loved by us.. what else you need? do you think that person richest tha you when she had someone hates her for a lifetime? think about this will you?

you already have the answer, what will you get when you get her down? with a kind heart like yours, I think you'll be sorry and regret it for a lifetime too. so.. don't you ever dare to turn yourself to be like her. God is Never sleep.

I have alot of love for you and I will be ready ehenever you want me to be your bumper of shit!

Thanks for the offer. I will keep that in mind.

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