What Drives Our Desire For Validation And Approval? 💉
A Pitfall In Life
The fear of abandonment and rejection went back to when my father died, which triggered the depressive episodes in the first place, which made me weary about myself. I was shook with fear; terror overran my mind, body and soul. I'd have done anything to please him, to get his approval when I was young, when I was an adult, and until he passed. Now, my chances of getting validation are gone. I will never have his approval. I will never know if I was good enough for him.
Even if you say you are the most broad-minded person ever, it's hard to hear those that have contrary opinions. Most of the time, you hang out with people that have similar tastes to you because you accept each other. You want to have fulfilling relationships and feel loved.
Our Guard Falls
When we are not approved of, we feel unsafe and unguarded. When we face rejection or ridicule, it controls our view of ourselves. If we take this kind of feedback, we will start to doubt our personal value. This threatens the security that we have built, and it will disrupt our inner harmony and put us in a place where we are vulnerable.
Changing your behaviour is one of the hardest things to do. You must not judge anyone else's amount of struggle. The casual tap on their shoulders that you give should provide them with strength to go out of their comfort zone, but not take it from them.
Be Proud Of Who You Are
When you speak or act in a way that makes you feel good about yourself, stop, then acknowledge it. When you work hard at something, find a way to reward yourself. It isn't egotistical to give yourself acknowledgement.
Although we are really by our surroundings, we should endeavour not to face rejection and disappointment as a reflection of who we are. It is essential for us to keep up self-love, compassion and unity.
