Happy Mother's Day

in #photograohy5 years ago (edited)


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Life is full of firsts. First date. First kiss. First love. First fight. First child. First. First. First. First Mother’s Day without a mother. Except it is not. Not any longer. That was a little more than a year ago that I put those words on paper, the inner sobs wracking my soul. So, it is not the first.

Losing your mother is such a profound kind of loss.


My sweet, beautiful mother is gone from this world; she is no more - she soared from this earth, high into the heavens. I cling to my memories. Just the thought of this day has been extremely depressing. For the very first time, I look at this day, relatively eyes wide open, in a manner of speaking. The ads scream perfume, jewelry, cards, and flowers. Buy! Buy! Buy!


But, it is not all about buying. In fact, for me, it never has been. Mother’s Day comes with a torrent of emotions that swirl around inside me like the perfect storm. It is the merger of sweet memories and regrets. My sweet, beautiful mother is gone from this world; she is no more - she soared from this earth, high into the heavens and I sit here and cling to my memories.



I have read that there are no parameters for this, losing your mother, it is a forever and ever amen, kind of journey. I have found some holidays are harder than other.


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I have forced myself to not give in to this, but. instead, do something for somebody else, it does make you feel better. The first year, I brought this sweet lady in assisted living some flowers and took her to lunch downtown. Win-win. I spent time with a mother, not my own, but, no kids in attendance, so we both won.

Holidays are always special in my house, but, I must say though, people(myself included) attach more importance and worth on those special days when in reality, every day there is someone out there grieving, and it is a hard day. By the time the actual holiday arrives, the worst is over. But, lest you think I have sunk into a pit of depression, I assure you I am fine.

I read this yesterday and it is so, so true. “My grief on this first Mother’s Day without my mother isn’t just missing buying her a card or gift. I take comfort in remembering that she was the gift, and one I can cherish for the rest of my life.” Life will not go on the same way without my mom. If it did, it would conclude her life meant nothing and had no contribution.


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I want to wish everyone a Happy Mother’s Day. May your day be filled with sunshine and happiness. Much love to you on this day and those that follow.

Thank you! Keep on Steemin'!!

And just like that, my post is done. Until next time! As always, I want to thank you for taking the time to stop by for a chat and a read!! Have a most fabulous day!


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Let the sun shine in on your life
So the joy may touch your soul




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Thank you for visiting my post 💖 Because of you, I come back to post again and again, I am encouraged by you, for the time you take to visit, comment or even upvote. For all of these reasons, I am eternally grateful. Don't ever forget what a wonderful world we live in, people. Let's hold hands around the globe and make this earth really spin. Some days, it is not as easy to see, how wonderful it really is. Kindness counts. Wherever you go, whatever you do.


I always post this poem down at the bottom of my posts. It is one that has become so near and dear to my heart. I only post the most famous part of it, but, wanted to post it in its entirety today.

they set my aunts house on fire
i cried the way women on tv do
folding at the middle
like a five pound note.
i called the boy who use to love me
tried to ‘okay’ my voice
i said hello
he said warsan, what’s wrong, what’s happened?

i’ve been praying,
and these are what my prayers look like;
dear god
i come from two countries
one is thirsty
the other is on fire
both need water.

later that night
i held an atlas in my lap
ran my fingers across the whole world
and whispered,
"where does it hurt?"
it answered,

"everywhere"
"everywhere"
"everywhere"

warsan shire



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Yes there has to be an unfillable hole left behind, as there should be. Like you said otherwise where is the loss. As you have done here, I think the most beautiful thing to do is to acknowledge the loss yet pay tribute and celebrate their life. So in all the good memories of your mother, I wish you a beautiful love filled Mother's Day. Big hugs Denise.

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There absolutely is that hole, the one that will never really heal, but, yes... that is exactly how I feel. Because to feel nothing would diminish her, in so many ways.

I know you know.

I celebrate the love of my mother every single day, just by getting up and carrying on my life, just as she would have wanted me to.

Thank you, Paul. I hope your day is amazing, you have been making a great mother and father for over a decade.

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Such beautiful shots, and the loss of a Parent always leaves a hole in us, that will never be filled, and on days like their Birthday or Mothers day for your Mother the loss is always stronger but I find it also brings back lovely memories.
I do feel your grief on this day and sends hugs and Happy Mothers day wishes to you my friend

Mothers day is foten commercialised with the advertising for gifts or flowers etc etc, and as you may know I am very against what I call HallMark Holidays but mothers day is not one of those,its a day to spend time with your mother if you can, if not to at least talk to them and tell them you love them and make there day special

And even now when we cannot spend time with them on this day, we can in our memories and we do and I am sure our others look down on us and smile because we do

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Thank you so much @Tattoodjay! The loss stings, but, it doesn't burn quite like it used to. It does bring back more memories instead and I am so repulsed by how they have commercialized all these beautiful days, making money on people's emotions.

Every day was Mother's Day as far as I was concerned, especially while my mom was living. She was an amazing person and I never failed to let a day go by (most of her kids felt exactly this way) without telling her how much I loved her.

Oh, the memories. You are so right!

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Good morning
I am not surprised your mother was amazing and truly loved by you and your siblings by the simple fact of how caring and kind you are and feeling your mother passed down those traits to you
And that’s the down side of Mother’s Day some go all out to do things for there Mother only on that one day of the year
I agree more should show their mothers love each and every day

Thank you so much for those kind words. The woman really was a Saint. I kid you not. I wish I could claim to be one-quarter of what she was. But, yes! What you said is true. They have the one day set aside and many people use that one day to honor their mother.

Hello? All the time, effort, love, lost sleep, miles driven! A mothers work is never done.

I also think we should celebrate Mother's Day every day of their lives.

Thank you! !tip

Not kind just what came to mind, you really are going to ruin my reputation with that Kind word LOL

I to was truly blessed with wonderful parents , as I child I perhaps didnt see it but as I reached adult hood I realized how truly blessed I was with them

Heheh! Truth!!! I want to spread the word on just how KIND you are! ;)

We were both lucky in life to have wonderful parents, and yes, I don't think I realized just how lucky until I looked around me at all the throwaway kids that have passed through my life.

Egads.

Bah Humbug, OK I know that’s for Christmas but it was the first thing that came to mind about your first sentence,

Indeed I think having Children also makes us more appreciative of our parents,I know it did for me

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I haven't had this with my mother yet... she is still around, but I do relate... my father passed away ... and there are certain days in the year, when I wish he could have seen how things turned out... and how much I owe to him...

That is exactly it!!! Right there! I wanted her to see my kids and how they are turning out in life. Or me! Or of my new accomplishments. I know that sounds self-centered, but, who else really cares deeply what you do?

In the same way...

Thanks for dropping by and leaving your words.

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You touched me deeply. I shall face another Mother's Day with "sweet memories and some regrets". Blessings to you.



Thank you so much my lovely friend. Such a profound loss, that of a mother. xoxo Happy Mother's Day to you!

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Happy Mothers Day to you, Denise. It is sad there has to be a special day to remember things/people by, when it should be daily. But I suppose life is a busy endeavor that makes that difficult at times. So we make special days for busy folks.
Such a heartfelt and wonderful post. Reminded me of my mother on this day even more than usual. I love what you said in the post. About appreciating them forever and that if we didn't miss them, and there was NOT an indelible hole in our life, it would diminish their time with us. Mine has been gone for awhile, and though it gets better with time, as the sage old advice always spouts, there is a constant piece of our being that is forever missing. As you said, that is probably the way it should be.

Thanks again for the thought provoking writing, with your usual gorgeous photos and other flourishes that you have. They are always an entire experience, often emotion stirring. I'd almost call some a small event, in both writing and photo and thought, in their own right. Thanks for that, and cheers on a Sunday in May.

Thank you so much @ddschteinn!!

I agree with you wholeheartedly! Of the nine kids in my family, we were a sappy bunch when it came to our mother. Each and every one of my six brothers fawned over my mother, especially when they became adults, letting her know just how much we loved her. Every single day. Everyone would bicker over who's turn it was to take mommy to lunch or have her over for dinner or coffee or dessert. You get the picture. She was a wanted women. :)

Even when she was in the hospital room, she was surrounded by her kids, right up until the very end. It was touching, even as I think about it now.

Thank you for understanding what I so inelegantly try to write. I can only write from the heart, but, you know how that can be when it gets all emotional on me. She is a failure, my heart is. :) Thank you for the wishes and well thank you for taking the time to stop in, set a while and take in a word or three.

You are such a ray of sunshine on this cloudy day. Thank you. And thank you again!

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Mothers are supposed to be sapped over. They do so much for us, it's a small return. Sounds very much like yours had a wonderful life, full of kids that really appreciated her, and more importantly, showed it constantly. My family was not as demonstrative, but there was always a lot of love and everyone knew it all the time. It's drifted a bit with both the familial matriarch and patriarch gone, but we do what we can with what life provides. Living within family and the progression of it all is both the grandest thing of life, and the saddest thing possible.

I'd say your heart is FAR from a failure, more of a very huge part of you, that most of your writings, thoughts and deeds passes through. Which the world could use a WHOLE lot more of, at least according to the oddity-laced Book of Schteinn. So keep up the great works, and just being you. I've always felt you are a bright ray of sunshine on the site of Steemit. Well, I am off to bed, just got back from a pedal, and Mr. Sleep is sneaking up on me. Thanks so much for the chat, it is always nice to catch up, and thanks for the the nice tip as well. Very sweet indeed. CheersonaSundaynightinMay.

I really like that though! Mothers are supposed to be sapped over. I couldn't agree with you more. They do so much for you and much of it is second nature to them. I don't think they think of it as something that they have to do, I think their hearts tell them. It's more of a sixth sense, if you will. My family was overly demonstrative in very much touchy-feely but that doesn't make it love. I think that most people know how it feels when it's being bestowed upon then. I will agree with you 100% that when the Familia matriarch and patriarch argon, the family Dynamics change drastically. More so now than it used to be. With people moving in and out and around and so many miles between them, the Dynamics seem to change even more. It used to be that the elderly aunt or Uncle would sort of take over that role but we are so much more disconnected with our extended relatives then our past relatives. The family unit as I was brought up he's so different in today's world.

And of course, it makes me a little bit sad thinking that because I moved about with my kids their entire life so far, I have disrupted the cycle in my own family. Of course, they don't see it went that way because they don't know any different oh, but I can see in their relationships with their cousins come they had never lived there is different than my cousin who grew up right down the street. I'm not sure how I feel about all that but on one hand I feel like I have cheated them in another hand I feel like I have given them a wonderful opportunity for growth in this world, having traveled 2 most of the continents and lived in a few. I guess there is no right or wrong, but I can still regret a few of those things that I was not able to provide them. Things I grew up with. However, I did not grow up with the amazing traveling experience that they all are having.

Thank you for always putting it all in perspective and it is nice to catch up and have a chat with one of my favorite . I hope you had a good rest and I will catch you again sooner than later!

Happy Monday!

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I don't much mourn my mother on Mother's Day as celebrate her. This is my second one, also. My mother left me an orphan at the tender age of 66. Too soon.

I miss my mom, but she had such a good life that I just can't mourn her. The one thing I hope she knows is that I have a dog again after several years with out. That always bothered her, and I wish she could meet Sam.

Thanks for a wonderful MD post. I really do appreciate it.

Thank you for such a wonderful comment!

I understand the celebration, and you are right. Mine had a most wonderful life also and I trust that both of them are looking down on us and your mom is well aware that you got that dog.

Dogs are really with that sixth sense and somehow I have a feeling that Sam has already met her.

And I hope that your day is amazing. As is the start of this new week!

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Denise this post left me with multiple emotions, I am so touched. I am so sorry you have to go on living this life without your precious mother. It bring joy to my heart seeing that you celebrate the memories. This post and all of the flowers are absolutely beautiful. I admit I fear losing my parents, I don’t know what that’s like and pray I won’t have to find out anytime soon.

Bless you my dear friend. You are so beautiful inside and out ~ 💗

Thank you so much, my friend. My mother was earlier than it should have been, she was taken with complications from surgery. One never knows, for sure.

I didn't think I would be without a mother yet, so cherish every moment, as I know you do. Mine was the bright light in my world. I miss her but, I can say that I still embrace this life as she would be disappointed with anything less.

She was just that kind of person. I pray you don't know either, but, God will call her home when He needs her, as we all well know. I hope you are having a most wonderful day and Mother's Day was amazing! xoxo

Love to you. Always. 💗

!tip

Absolutely :)

Yes I am focusing on cherishing every moment that I can. Ironically my father just had a slight stroke yesterday. Never before in his life has he ever had one or anything similar. It’s so scary but it looks like he will recover okay. Geez this life has so many uncertainties but one thing is for sure, God does have the final say. I pray now asking Him to prepare my heart and give me strength for that dreadful day when I have to say goodbye to my parents (that is of course unless I leave first).

Keep on embracing ~ 😊🌺

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@dswigle,

Very poignant, Denise. There's no Gilding the Lilly ... losing a person with whom one is so deeply attached is heart-rending.

Here's a poem that's a little off-topic but I'm sure you'll get the gist:
.

.
Quill

@quillfire

So deeply touched, I have no words. Thank you so much, Quill.

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In Romania there is no celebration for Mother's Day. And yet ... it's the first without my mother, as you know. This beautiful and sensitive blog has made me remember that.
I think that initially I thought I'd just see some great pictures ...

I am surprised there is no celebration for Mother's Day! Especially because mothers are so revered there. It is your first year and always, always the hardest as far as I am concerned. I thought of you today especially as it was the first without your mom.

!tip

Thank you! Yes, no celebration...is a somewhat celebration on 8 March, as women day.
You kill me with your graphics at the end, is it drawn by you?

Women's Day. Sort of, but, you can be a single woman also. This is specifically for mothers. Oh, the graphics at the end are just for fun! :)

Noooo not by me!

Graphics have a very good effect, especially in blogs. I like a lot ... I tried to do a few but I was not happy with the result.

Well, there have been a lot of losers in what I have chosen, but, I am happy with most.

Another common thing we have, I can say the same with you!

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You are more than welcome, Dan!

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