River Drown: what do you do when the world pushes you to the wall?

Here we are
on this lone hill,
thy fate today I'll leave
to fate's true course.

This first stanza is an imagery of the poet personae standing on a hill to contemplate a while before descending with a two day old innocent/poor child who out of frustration she wants to drown in a local river

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Note, the poet is very conscious of his syntax choice of the word 'path' instead of paths, just to depict the strong bond/fusion which held the two characters (mother and child) which should be inseparable) but it's now broken due to frustration. You know, in this part of the world I come from, the society really frowns out teenage pregnancy as well as having a child out of wedlock.

The ellipses, below shows a chasm after the drowning act, no doubt the poet persona has moved on, nobody seem to know what she did yet the guilt grows with her, although she has tried hard to hide. So guess her fate?

......................................

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Here returns to the very spot which she stood years back to drown the baby, she's yelling on the poor child's spirit who I guess is listening to her cry, so she could table her plea

No doubt, the child she had drown years ago was her first fruit, but what sort of storm of life could possibly make a mother drown her own child? Selah

She continues to call on the child's spirit since she didn't get any response during the initial call, but this time she calls soberly

Nemesis has caught up with her as she's in dire need of a child for her new husband, whose perhaps is totally unaware of her past atrocities which has left her childless. Her husband is very worried because they've been married for years without a cry of a child. More so, he is not aware that the woman is at fault for their childlessness. As depicted in one of the lines, the woman's past is known to no one else than she and the baby. Such a strange secrete. Unfortunately, I suspect that this is not going to be easy for her. Read on, don't break the suspense.

She does not seem to be tired of calling on the child's spirit. Notice that she does not have a known name for the child else formed the name - My River Drown. It tells how young the child was when her mum decided to throw it into the river. Hence, child in question has not been christened, yet to her, it's an enemy and stranger that is certainly not welcomed because of the society's perception about her and the child. Hmmmmmmm, that's life for you.

Note that she initially had said that the birth of the child was not welcomed, but now shes at cross-road, getting to menopause and of-course she needs a child to cry in her arms hence, her faint cry. She didn't appreciate the birth and presence of the child then, but she is helpless without it.

To be continued..........

What's your thought about this poem? Your comments make me better.