What a hot rod - All the King's kiwis

This spoken poetry piece is inspired by the car industry, crowbar savagery, infatuated aliens and dirty anime. It is level pro, so I won't downplay a level of muddle it can instigate.

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It's been quite a while, this uncanny feeling, it's a melee.
Yes, a car show is coming in town.
So, enough of the care cookies and The Milk,
it's time to feed the machine with
some noisette and the corned beef, for the shrubs.
Get the grubs. Get the popcorn. Here we go.

A standup tragedy - a trump card in a suite - exhibit one.
Squawks, set your flashers all ready and sharp
and observe how to polish Uncle Ben's pair
of leather boots.
A hairy chode, that bloke but, hey wow!
-look at that body in white with the gingerbread dress-up.
Sir, how do you bark? Perfection, huh?
Did everyone took a snap!?

Next, a pristine trailer queen, a barn fest, cherry fresh, in stock.
Wanna drag, drive a pamphlet slab?
No sweat, this one is an upper-hand.
Thin mufflers, of course, carnage it.
Of the record, we got the chumps down by the roadside
from the frolicking dairy infantry, a long love story.
Keep it up, Groupon pride; I skimmed that cream already last month.
Ain't we chatty today my kiwi gang bang, well...
all good, the orchestrated roast next. Hold my beer!

This one, as you stand in front of it,
great for the family gatherings.
I can tell you in advance put your money there
-a 6 party ride-on lawnmower, camouflaged.
Take a picture, take a big picture.
Move on apes, next exhibit!

Faceless beastness ahead, pedestrians please, gather all around.
Quickly take that cam. I'm in a hairdo day. That will do.
It's easy to be pleasy, look at that animal.
All the dust it blows owes it to The Th-Th-That Guy.
Now, amen to the Grand Atheist, let's wrap the minority report!

Hala, when push comes to shove it's time to wage
a small sedition play, one cent you have above, is not a cent wasted.
Yes, we endorse the reintegration, who said otherwise?
-No ticket, no ride, keep the change,
nobody wants the grease marks!
If you didn't pay it, don't touch it!
Now - let me sign - this one is botched and with rice,
but what a hell, the banner's what counts;
speakers' shaggin' out of a tomato can
blown of the valve, only add a duck-taped neon light
and Alicization arc on a bonnet strapped.

That bags the jewels, any questions...?

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Cover image attribution - quite conveniently - Haiyore! Nyaruko-san - Reddit

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