Talking to Myself. (A selfpoem)

in #poetry5 years ago (edited)

0029.jpg


hey,
look.

That's me ..
in the past..
so many years ago.

It might as well be
a thousand lifetimes
between that me
and the now me
the me me.

I stare at myself
and I feel strange thoughts
because on that day
I was so happy
but I didn't realize it,
I thought I was sad

but

I didn't know sad
not really
not yet
but
it was coming
and I was not prepared

I was stupid and unworldly
but right on the brink
of the undeniable sink
of the ship that would sail
into shark-painted waters
and try to drown me

I reflect

In so many ways
it seems
that we just float away
without feeling the breath
upon our now

we don't know we have wings
attached to our dreams
we don't know it in time
to jump into the clocks
and tear the hands off

Now my coffee spills secrets
into an empty room
and nobody hears them

and no one cleans it up
except for me
me

I unspill the secrets
and
re-pour them
into a new glass
a new me
filled with new dreams
and new stupid things
to pass my time away
into the new now

And so I gaze at myself
in the then
and wish that I could go back in time
and tell myself then
what I didn't know yet
what I do know now

I can't. But if I could
I'd say a lot to myself

I'd tell me I'm not fat
and that I'm not as ugly
as I think
and that I don't need to color my hair
because it's not even gray yet

I'd tell myself to enjoy that tree
because one day it won't be there anymore
and one day I won't be there anymore
at least not as much
and I will miss it.

I miss it.

my head bounces from thought
to thought
effortlessly and yet struggling

I will lie down now
and dream about new wings
and I will toss a wish into the air
above my head, above my bed..

let me know when I'm wearing wings
let me not be so stupid about things
help me dream a new dream.




©2019 s.m. (paintingangels)
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@paintingangels lovely poem.. thanks for sharing. And thanks for all the support on helpie. Heard this on #pypt

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oh my my my.

This was absolutely exquisite. Really and truly.

I need to print this out and savor it, over time. This is just.... wow.

I have chills. I have tears. it touched me so deeply.

@thekittygirl shared this on #pypt and I'm so thrilled that she did - i hope that more eyes see this poem... its so worth it!

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<3

Oh Serena, I feel like my heart cracks another sliver every time I read one of your poems. It's good for breaking out of my Nihilistic mindset sometimes...

Such melancholie floating in the now, but looking at the then...

This is so fabulous! So raw, written so well, thoughts from a beautiful soul... 😊

This post has been selected for curation by @sunravelme. It has been upvoted and will be featured in this week's Working Title post. It will also be considered for the official @minnowsupport curation post and if selected will be resteemed from the main account. Feel free to join us on Discord!

Claps. Love it. It made me want to do my own...!

Hello!

This post has been manually curated, resteemed
and gifted with some virtually delicious cake
from the @helpiecake curation team!

Much love to you from all of us at @helpie!
Keep up the great work!


helpiecake

Manually curated by @eonwarped.

Is that bleeding heart cake really random? Asking for a friend.

We have a large list and it selects from there yeah

I was being ironic. Now I am explaining that to you. That's ironic.

shrug

(Oh. Now everything makes sense, looking at context. My reply initially did not have the full view lol)

@thekittygirl dropped this on PYPT for me and she knows I'm a huge poetry fan. LOVE this! Will be reading it tomorrow on my show in the Ramble😎

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I'm not really super into poetry, but this seems like a good painting of one's inner soul coming out into the world @paintingangels,
Glad that they shared this on this morning's PYPT for you.

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