[PSYCHOLOGY] Five Different Ways to Deal With Anger and Sadness – Don’t Let These Emotions Become Demons

In this article I’m going to write about anger and sadness that comes from not being able to set clear and firm boundaries for other people, not being able to communicate feelings, and not being able to deal with conflicts and problems in a calm and nice way. There’s at least five different ways to deal with this specific anger.

1. The best way is of course to talk in a calm and nice way to the person that cased you to feel this anger and sadness. To talk about problems and dealing with conflicts is an art that many people need to practice and get better at. You need to remember that you should talk to them in a way that does not make them angry or sad themselves. You need to show a lot of respect towards the other person and you need to make sure that the other person does not feel attacked. You can say the same thing in so many different ways but you need to learn to say this type of things in a calm and nice way. You should try to not act in anger or other emotions. Make sure that you are calm when you take this conversation and maybe you need a few days to think it through. Also pay attention to find the right timing.

2. Another common way to deal with this specific anger and sadness is to talk bad about someone behind their back. Of course it’s much better to take it with the person that’s involved and who caused you anger and sadness straight instead. I think to talk about someone behind their back is actually a sign of weakness from your side. You simply don’t have the courage to speak up with the person that’s actually involved so you choose this way instead. When you talk bad behind someone’s back I feel like a kind of release. I think it’s the energy of the anger and sadness that’s released. This works especially if you talk with someone who agrees with you in this specific matter about this person. You will, at least partly, get it out of your system. But it does have a bitter after taste for many people. Instead they now feel guilt, shame or like a bad person because they talked bad about another person. Have you ever talked bad about another person and suddenly you find yourself really angry and/or sad? I think this might be part of the release, you let yourself feel the emotions and then they can get partly or fully out of your system. But as I said, this is not something I would recommend as a strategy.

3. This way of dealing with the anger or sadness is rather ugly but I believe it’s pretty common. Someone makes you angry and sad and you can’t talk about it with the person for some reason and maybe you don’t want to talk bad about that person behind her/his back either so what happens is that you take the pain and sadness out on an easy victim. This victim has nothing to do with the source of the anger or sadness. Sadly I think these easy victims are often children, or it can be anybody that is “bellow you” or is weak in some way. The person that takes out their anger and sadness on an easy victim do it simply because they can, they know the victim is safe and not strong enough to say something about this. I think this is partly the psychology behind bullies. Put in a very simple way the bully pick an easy victim to treat badly to themselves get their anger and sadness out of their system. It’s more complex then this but this is one aspect. I also think that to be very irritated often on almost everyone is a way to let the anger and sadness slowly sip out of your system and this is not very good either.

4. There’s a fourth option. You can keep it inside of you but I believe very few people do this. And I don’t think it’s good at all to do this. Maybe it’s better than to throw it on an easy victim, maybe it’s better than to talk bad about other people behind their back. I’m not sure though. If you keep collecting this anger and sadness it will literally eat your soul. It will destroy you. Maybe it can cause depression and other mental problems, abuse and addiction of different kinds, and also sudden, more or less extreme unexpected outbursts of anger. I think that maybe it can even become so severe that the person kills someone. Yes, I think it might be that dangerous. And alcohol and other drugs can let your inner demons free and maybe this is why many people get violent on alcohol and other drugs. Everything they have inside of them that they tried to suppress and ignore comes out to the surface.

5. This option is a creative way. You can try to find alternative ways to get out your anger and sadness. For example you can scream out load in the forest. You can exercise really hard. Maybe you could do some artwork or writing. Maybe you can punch a boxing bag. Maybe you could break something that you don’t need anymore. Just find something that works for you.

To summarize; anger and sadness is something you need to take responsibility over. It can become very dangerous and destroy your whole life and other lives if you don’t find a good way to deal with it. I also think that it’s important that you forgive the person who caused you this anger and sadness but that doesn’t mean that you should ignore or accept their behavior. The best way is to talk about the problems or conflicts with the person before they get to large and to do it in a calm and nice way. When you cleared the air you can let it go, move on, and forgive. If the person is very toxic and difficult to deal with you might be better off to just walk away, if you can. This is something that we need to address, because it can be extremely dangerous and still I think it’s very common. Anger and sadness are no toys, they can really damage yourself and others. You must work on this issues if you have them, other ways I promise you that these emotions will come out sooner or later in very ugly ways. Anger and sadness are energy, don’t fool yourself that you can somehow destroy these energies, they need to go somewhere, somehow. Energy can never be destroyed. Be conscious about how you let these energies come out and to whom you give these energies. It’s dirty, black and heavy energies. Please take responsibility over them and respect yourself and other people. If you can clear your body, mind and soul out of anger and sadness of these type I’m pretty sure that your life will be much better and that you will have better relationships and becoming happier. So, be honest with yourself, which methods of these five do you use most of the time? How could you deal with these energies in a healthier way?