Are you attractive?

We ask ourselves everyday if we are attractive or not, and the most frequent answer we give ourselves is “no”. But a little compliment from someone is enough to make us feel better.

Gleb Tsypursky says that we are shy in our nature and we have the natural tendency to criticize ourselves harder than we criticize others.

Studies have shown that mass media has a huge negative influence on our opinions about ourselves, because it sets certain beauty standards.

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But this doesn’t explain why are we harder on ourselves than on others. Gleb Tsypursky sayd that there are 2 basic ideas that have an important role on this:

Our visions are very important for us, and the looks of others doesn’t mean that much too us, we care a lot more about the way we look.

We are sure that our vision is more accurate than others’. There’s a theory in psychology that explains why we only focus on our own flaws. It is called “the aversion over losing things” and it means that the fear of losing something is bigger than the pleasure of obtaining it.

Tsypursky explained this the next way: Someone gives you 1000 dollars. After you have received the money, you have to choose between two options.

Either he takes back 400 dollars and you are left with 600, either you play coins and there’s a chance you lose all the money. The results have shown that 61% of the subjects have chosen to risk everything, knowing that there’s a chance they could get all the money.

Even if it seems risky and illogical, people will react in an irrational way when there’s the risk of losing something.

That’s why, when we analyze ourselves, we tend to focus on our flaws, because they give us a disadvantage in the society, they make us “lose” the chances that “attractive” people have.

How can we have a positive and balanced attitude towards ourselves? We have to pay attention to our qualities and try to make them more valuable.

Start appreciating what you can do, not what you can’t, and you’ll start seeing yourself in a more objective way.