Getting along with your sibling - Tips for kids

If you are not the only child in the house you will know exactly how it is to have a brother or sister.  

Maybe a younger one that follows you around, maybe a sister that is always borrowing your stuff and not returning it, maybe an older sibling that gets away with a lot of this or the other way round where the younger one gets spoiled.

You know exactly what I am talking about.  Sometimes siblings can just be a pain, but there are ways to try and get along.

It is normal that there will be 'sibling rivalry' in the house, which means competition between the brothers and sisters and not always be 'one big happy family'.

A little competition between you and your siblings can even be good.  Each one will try his/her best, but the problem is that sometimes this is taken too far and people can get hurt - physically and mentally and it is also not nice to live in a house where there is always just a lot of fighting going on.

Sometimes we really need to try and get along... even if it is just to keep our parents sane.

Have you ever heard of the green-eyed monster called jealousy? Sometimes brothers and sisters are jealous of one another. For instance, if your sister always does well at school, it may be frustrating for you, especially if your grades are lower. 

We are all different from one another and we have different talents, so even if it is fine to be a little jealous, or sometimes wish you were like your sibling, is is a much better idea to focus on yourself, accept yourself the way you are and do your best.  

Rather be in competition with yourself than with your siblings.

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If you feel that you are not getting enough attention from your parents and your sibling is taking up all their time, do not act out like a baby.  Rather talk to them and explain that you are different than your sibling but also needs attention from time to time.  Your parents cannot 'smell' if you are unhappy with something, so try and talk to them without throwing a tantrum.

It can be difficult at times not to get involved in a fight, so try the following

• take a deep breath before you confront your sibling.  Think about the reasons that make you feel frustrated and be honest with yourself.  Are you just being jealous and looking for a fight or is it something that really bothers you?  How can you talk to your sibling to sort out the problem?
• be sure to think about what you are good at and that it is fine to be different from your sibling.
• make a point of trying to be proud of your sibling and even congratulate them if they do well at something or be there if they need help.

 If the situation gets out of control and you and your brother or sister start fighting a lot, you may need to talk to someone. Mean words can lead to hitting and physical fighting. If this is going on with you and your sibling, talk to a parent or another trusted adult. 

It may be difficult to understand or even think about now, but your sibling may become your best friend one day when you are older.  They are the first friend you ever had and even in times when you disagree you can be sure that they 'have your back'.

So try and sort out your differences and be proud of one another and remember that they will be there for you if you need it, even if they are quite irritating at this stage.

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