Baby products for dads, or why I bought a luminescent pacifier

Garbage bag dispenser for full nappies, plate with suction cup, bib with drip tray - all nice but useless inventions for young fathers. You have to search for the really important things for a long time.

"I can not anymore," my wife moans as she gets to bed at nine o'clock on Friday. "He's finishing me. Next time it's your turn ". With that she turns aside and pulls the blanket over her. At that time, Leon, 8 months, had special problems falling asleep. My wife had to lull him to sleep four times already. No wonder she is completely exhausted. A few minutes later I hear the regular breathing of my wife - she is sleeping. Well, at least one, I think, when shortly after a quiet whining comes from the bedroom of our son.

The drama starts

Alright, it's my turn. I creep so quietly I can into his room and lean over the cot. Probably only the pacifier fell out, I suspect and grab beside his head. Nothing. Now Leon realizes that someone is there and reaches for my hand. With the other hand I stroke the bed sheet. Where is the pacifier? Leon's whining gets louder and he starts to turn. No, please do not, I think. Because when he starts to turn, it means that he is awake again. Where is the stupid pacifier? My hand strokes the bed sheet faster and faster. Leon turns and starts to sob. No, no, please do not, I implore silently. I strok Leon over the head, trying to calm him down.

Maybe under the bed?

Maybe the pacifier fell through the bars on the floor? I kneel down and wipe my hand across the floor. If only I could turn on the light, but then Leon is awake immediately. That is not possible. The pacifier, of course, could have slipped under the bed? I briefly stroke Leon in the hope that it will relax him, but his sobs are louder. Okay, I have to find the pacifier right away. So, I lay down flat on the floor and put my arm under the bed. Still nothing. So slipped on, pushed his head under the bed and then slowly on. And then it happens: I have to sneeze. Now he is definitely awake. But that's not all. Above me, I hear Leon straightening up in bed, pulling himself up by the bars, and crying at the top of his throat. No, no, Leon, do not cry, I think, trying to come out from under the bed again, but ... shit, I'm stuck. The fact that Leon is standing on the bars, he pushes the mattress down the edge and right there my head must now through. I'm stuck. I pull my arm out from under the bed and try to reach Leon, but only reach into the bars. Please, please sit down again, I implore under the bed, but no one hears me except the woolly mice. Now Leon starts stomping with her feet. Ouch, I moan under the mattress and get again pressed the slatted frame on the cheek. My arm is rowing wildly, hoping to grab my son so that I can finally pull him back onto the bed to free me.

Mission failed

But too late, I hear the door being opened. Then the light is switched on and a sleepy voice says: "What's going on here?"

I admit that the picture that my wife is seeing right now is worrying: There's a broken-down son in the crib, tears running down his cheeks while his own husband's head hangs under the cot, his butt held out in the air and the left arm is waving uncoordinated through the air.
"What are you doing there?", I hear my wife ask. For a moment I am tempted to answer: "I am looking for oil", but I decide for the truth. "I'm looking for Leon's pacifier," I call from under the bed. My wife picks up Leon and I can finally free my head. "Ah, finally," I say relieved and look into the head-shaking face of my wife.

"Hey, what should I do?", I say and get up. I did not want to wake Leon completely. "You have done so well," she replies, stroking Leon's cheeks to wipe away the tears. "Yes, but why can not you find those stupid pacifiers in the dark?" I defiantly reply. "Why are not they shining?" At that moment I take a step forward and ... "Ow!", Step on something hard. I look under my aching sole and find - Leon's pacifier.

Luminescent pacifiers and self-warming glasses

The next morning, I drive up the notebook and enter: "Luminescent pacifier" and indeed, it gives it. I'll order three. Next time, I'll save myself the trouble if I can find the pacifier and give it back to my son. Then I'm sure my wife will recognize the benefits of glowing pacifiers. Oh yes, and looking for self-heating glass I also. For anyone who has ever tried to warm up a jar in a pot and stir it with a starving child knows how practical that would be, the jars would heat themselves. But I'll tell about that next time.

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