(No) secret of a happy partnership

In the initial phase of a relationship, the world is usually still fine. The sky is full of violins and there are almost never any problems. Boredom? Wrong! But that changes over time. Everyday life has arrived and with it the routine. Can you escape that?

Probably nowhere else do the strengths and weaknesses of a person show themselves as clearly as in a partnership. What seemed attractive to us at the beginning becomes common. And what we initially generously tolerated, just burdened. That's what we call "everyday life".

Anyone who still thinks, a relationship is a self-run and works by itself, who is either a die-hard single or will soon be. Maintaining a long-term partnership is not just a pleasure, it also means investing and constantly revitalizing work.

Just beautiful!

The following thoughts do not contain any patent recipes or the latest scientific findings. These are simple things that almost everyone knows and that we should only recall from time to time.

1. Please remember the beginning of your partnership. You have certainly talked about your goals, wishes and dreams. Much has perhaps been fulfilled, other has remained unprecedented. It is important, very important, even to discuss the common life planning now and then. Situations change and with it the ideas of the great common happiness. Although it may sound hackneyed: talking to each other is the basis of a good partnership. Talk to your partner about your experiences and thoughts, about what moves them. Because even if the common relationship still works so well - a clairvoyant is certainly not her partner.
   By the way, an American study has found that an average American couple talks less than five minutes a day after 15 years of marriage each day. Incredible, is not it?

2. Over time, we get used to what the partner does for us and consider it normal. Everything we do not do the way we want it, we filter out and criticize it. This process is not uncommon and may well be observed in any longer relationship. Unfortunately, we also get an increasingly negative attitude towards our partner. And that's not good.

Maybe it helps in this case, once to compare your own partner with others to see your own negative opinion with some distance. Because this is how you correct possible unrealistic expectations you have of him.

Of course, compliments or praise have a positive effect on any partnership, because they always create a good feeling. From the loving kiss to the teasing pat on the butt you can express that even with small gestures. A small "thank you" does not hurt anyone, even if it's just about trivial things. After all, your partner will also do these everyday tasks for you.

1. Especially in the first time we get to know each other, we spend a lot of time to present our partner as attractive as possible.
   From the neat clothes to the careful styling of the hair, we have left no stone unturned to impress our partner at least externally and win for us. And what about today? Mostly dominated by the house suit, ideally combined with comfortable slippers. If you like it more sporty, slip into the jogging suit and make with the ever-popular Adiletten for another fashionable exclamation point. Of course that's convenient, no question. But it is not exciting anymore. And certainly not sexy. So how about when you make an appointment with your partner from time to time? Whether for a joint dinner in the restaurant or at home. The important thing is that you consciously prepare for it - as in "old" times. It can also show others how important it is to you.

2. Even in a strong partnership, it is important to pursue one's own interests and preferences.
   This will make you interesting again for your partner and provide new conversation. Another plus point is that you can escape the dependency on partnership. Because you also get confirmation from other people and not just from your partner. Your own circle of friends or your own activities not only provide variety, but also contribute a lot to the personal balance.

3. Especially young parents wish after some time, even something to do without the exhausting offspring.
   The romantic getaway is a nice idea, but unfortunately not always affordable. Children are an expensive pleasure - who would not know that?
   Nonetheless plan a weekend together as a couple at (un) regular intervals.
   Even if you are "only" staying home. The grandparents or friends are certainly willing to accommodate your offspring for this time. And if you have fixed that, it just means: enjoy your togetherness ...

At this point, many more points could be listed to give your partnership a new kick. But surely you will come up with enough alternatives yourself.
But one thing should always apply: Everything - just not boring!

No work without work

A partnership does not work automatically and even love does not last forever without our help. For example, think about your job. Here, too, it is important to constantly improve your education in order to achieve good performance or to get a good working atmosphere.
In a long-term relationship, that's no different and even more important. Jobs come and go, but you may only find your dream partner once in a lifetime.

To maintain the positive and to live as well as possible with the weaknesses - that is a formula for success of the partnership. Also, the ability to work together to solve problems is seen by many couples as an important factor in partner satisfaction. And that works best when both partners feel comfortable.

Invigorate your partnership and you will find that it is much easier to handle. As then, the grass is a bit greener, the sky a bit bluer and everyday life a little lighter.
And you may even hear the violins of yesteryear again. Maybe a bit quieter, but with the same beautiful melody ...

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