Extraordinary Tales of Romanians: Ep. 4 - The Drunken Priest

Oh, Your Holiness, you are dead drunk!

We give priests such a high esteem within our society and I can't explain why. I've never met a trusty priest in Romania. They were either those crazy, extremist type that would burn you to the stick for watching porn or the other type. More inclined to experiencing life than living by "The Book", if you know what I mean. Not one balanced individual that would strengthen my faith in the Church and its employees.

For this episode of the series dedicated to the extremists of my fellow Romanians, I decided to stop upon the merry priests, those caught on the camera (and Lord knows they're many) that decided suddenly to give a show. They usually end up caught and taped by the Police as they never hesitate to jump behind the wheel and proceed on God's way.

Because I'm that kind of a guy, who likes to make and keep a tradition and GOD KNOWS we orthodox like traditions, I'll go on and proceed backwards in time with the examples I bring to your attention.

"Get the fuck out, this is my church, fuck BOR and fuck you!"

Imagine you've decided to finally get married to the woman you already have a child with. Yeah, I know, it's a little bit late to wish for that "flawless" night but anyway, you still need the priest to do the ceremony. Not to add that you've also connected the baptism of your "illegal child" to the same moment, to the same church and the worse...to the same priest.
Now imagine you go to the church at the correct hour, as decided previously with the priest and you wait. Officially you wait for the priest to finish "reading" in the altar, as the weirdos tending the church tell you. And after almost 2 hours of waiting you decide to storm the place and surprise, surprise:

The priest is sleeping in the altar, head on the table, breathing pure alcohol in the air.

After managing to wake the poor sob, the entire audience proceeds to the ceremony. The only issue is that the priest should've been let to sleep more because now he is grumpy and totally drunk, dropping shit and cursing people. When the mother of the child ready to be baptised, claimed that she will not let the drunkard drown her baby, he got so revolted that he got everybody evacuated. Just like that. It's God's wish you know!
When later he was asked details about the incident he claimed that Saturday and also the following Sunday, he had some kidney crisis and had to be hospitalised. In fact, he was so drunk that Saturday, that he had to call in sick for Sunday mass because of the hangover that’s was most probably, killing him.
source in case the video upstairs seems hard to believe.

Blow it... don't bite it

Now, this mother fucker is so drunk that he decided to bite the rubber thing on the alcohol test. Like an ungrateful bitch. So after hitting some 2 or 3 cars and almost killing 4 people, injuring pretty seriously two kids, he hit some border and turned his car upside down. Barely standing up he got into fights with everybody at the scene: the Police, the news reporter, the people that he almost killed. To each, he shared curses like it was Black Friday.
Funny thing is that this idiot was not just another poor village priest. He wasn't just that dumb prick that drank that afternoon with the policeman and the mayor from the village. Noooo... he was some big shot around one of the smaller "Churches" (as they call them), the Organisation around the City of Constanta. These motherfuckers gather up in these cluster like organisations that do not obey the majority of the laws in the country they dwell in.

They are "raping the rewards" from stupid people still kissing their dirty hands.

source of the article.

"You don't get to fuck with me..."

Not that the guy dressed as a police officer would want that for sure.

Now I'll have to honest with this one: it's from Moldavian Republic but guys, they speak the same language, we lost that territory to Stalin while playing craps and it's too good not to include this one.
I guess the guy lives in the former communist regime. His actions surely say so. And I'm saying "actions" (plural) in order to let you know in advance that a man of his stature could not be involved in only one great deed. Most probably he is stuck in the old regime, back when he was a hotshot being a whistleblower for the Political Police. That was the only way you could keep your parish back then.
If you search on Google for "Bulboaca" (that's the village) and then add the term "preot" (that's "priest" in romanian) you will get multiple results. I know I did, now, that I researched the guy. He is (or was, maybe he died meantime, who knows?) famous for this accident in which he turned up to be dead drunk while injuring two. He also got some bonus stars having a lot of claims from the old babushkas in the village for preaching drunk AND for hitting one of them during a sermon, so bad that the woman almost lost consciousness.
Talk about having empathy for the weak.
source in case you want to research more about this devil in disguise.

Take it like you mean it

I have no idea if the priest is drunk or is just heavily screwed up but it's just funny in order to construct an idea of an ending to the article around it.
For sure he is overzealous. Just look at him consuming those litres of Holy Water like he's saying "There! have more you infidels! There's plenty more where that came from." I like the fact that he is having the actions of a robot, look at him!
Waving that branch with those mechanical arms, the only point in doing what his doing iss to absorb as much water as possible with that broom.

And the people just standing there to

take it all in.

Drones, I'm telling you! D R O N E S !

Steem on mates!