Did the Christmas Wrapping Story Really Have a Happy Ending?

in #story5 years ago (edited)

Taking a different look at the Christmas Rapping song by The Waitresses

It's that time of year when music stations start playing Christmas music. For the most part, those songs are classic songs redone over and over again every few years by a new artist. There are few songs written after Holiday Inn (1942) and White Christmas (1954) were released, that are truly good and unique.

One of these songs is by The Waitresses, which was a group that rode the Punk Wave into the early 1980s. They had regular hit called "I Know What Boys Like", which probably wouldn't be very politically correct nowadays. Frankly, it wasn't a very good song and seems totally different than "Christmas Wrapping". There isn't much information on The Waitresses and it doesn't seem as if the group was made of waitresses at all, but some dudes with guest female singers.

Anyway, we'll try to ignore that the two noted songs for the group are about women going after men, were written by a man and take a look at the story being told.

Christmas Wrapping

First off, the "wrapping" part is a play on words. The song, while have a ska/punk sound to it, it is actually a rap song in its delivery, hence the name.

The story is about how the main character (female lead) ran into a guy while at a ski shop and how they tried to get together for date all year long, yet one thing or another prevented them from actually having the date. The main character is lamenting the year and is trying to forget everything that happened and is settled into the fact that she'll be spending Christmas alone this year. As the chorus shows, she's trying not participate, so she won't be let down.

"Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas. But, I think I'll miss this one this year."

The main characters is suffering from fate of never making the connection. Between not figuring out a free day to have a date, sun burn and broken down cars, it would seem as if the two would never get together, so it is time to move on. The main character knows that fate is working against her, but she can't let go of the connection she made with the guy last winter. This almost put the relationship on the "star crossed" levels. A relationship that would be great, if only the connections were made.

At the end of the song, the main character has to get a forgotten item for her Christmas dinner alone. She already has the turkey in the oven, so she knows she can leave it while she runs out to the only all night grocery store in her area. When she's in line, she runs into "that guy I've been chasing all year" and what could be a very possible happy ending to her year. But, he is also in the store, because he forgot to grab cranberries as well.

That Turkey in the Oven

Cooking time for a turkey is around 15 minutes per pound. The main character is cooking a whole turkey, so the smallest whole turkey a person can buy is around 6-8 pounds. This would mean, she has 90 -120 minutes until her turkey is done. As far as we know, based on other verses in the song, she is probably walking to the store.

Hardly dashing through the snow
'Cause I bundled up too tight.

Let's just say that the trip would take her 30 minutes round trip and give her another hour before her dinner is ready.

Plenty of time. However....

The guy drives a car and he has had car trouble as well. It is also possible, that he started his dinner back at his place, expecting to be able to drive to the store and get back in time before the turkey was done. If this is the case, then either the girl or the guy will need to go back to their place, turn off their oven and then head over to the other person's place. This, would lead to the possiblity of another car break down or other incident to happen, ending the date they had planned and the "very happy ending."

Hopefully a couple more verses or maybe a follow-up song about how well the date went would be in order. Maybe a guy group could do that song, it hasn't been the first time a song was answered with another song.

The Supremes - Where did our love go (1964)
Soft Cell - Tainted Love (1981)

Anyway, hopefully it was a happy ending, because we are only left to our imagination as to what happened after the grocery store checkout. The final chorus gives into that hope, with a change in the lyrics from a plan to miss it, to glad that she didn't miss it.

Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas! Couldn't miss this one this year.

The video really doesn't go along with the song and it is dying for a remake with the actual story as the video.

Bah Humbug; now that's too strong!
'Cause it is my favorite holiday.

But all this year's been a busy blur
Don't think I have the energy

To add to my already mad rush
Just 'cause it's 'tis the season.
The perfect gift for me would be
Completions and connections left from last year.

Ski shop encounter most interesting.
Had his number but never the time,
Most of '81 passed along those lines.

So deck those halls. Trim those trees.
Raise up cups of Christmas cheer.
I just need to catch my breath;
Christmas by myself this year

Calendar picture. Frozen landscape,
Chill this room for twenty-four days.
Evergreens. Sparkling snow.
Get this winter over with!

Flash back to spring time saw him again
Would have been good to go for lunch.
Couldn't agree when we were both free.
We tried, we said we'd keep in touch.

Didn't of course 'till summer time,
Out to the beach to his boat.
Could I join him?
No. This time it was me;
Sunburn in the third degree.

Now the calendar's just one page
Of course I am excited.
Tonight's the night I've set my mind
Not to do too much about it.

Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas
But I think I'll miss this one this year.

Hardly dashing through the snow
'Cause I bundled up too tight.
Last minute have-to-dos:
A few cards, a few calls

Because it's RSVP.
No, thanks. No party lights.
It's Christmas Eve, gonna relax,
Turn down all of my invites.

Last fall I had a night to myself
Same guy called; Halloween party.
Waited all night for him to show.
This time his car wouldn't go.

Forget it, it's cold, it's getting late.
Trudge on home to celebrate.
In a quiet way unwind.
Doing Christmas right this time.

A&P has provided me
With the world's smallest turkey.
Already in the oven, nice and hot.
Oh damn! Guess what I forgot.

So on with the boots
Back out in the snow
To the only all night grocery.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
In the line is that guy I've been chasing all year.

'Spending this one alone, ' he said.
'Give me a break, this year's been crazy.'
I said 'Me too, but why are you..
You mean you forgot cranberries too?'

Then suddenly we laughed and laughed.
Caught on to what was happening.
That Christmas magic's brought this tale
To a very happy ending.

Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas
Couldn't miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas
Couldn't miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas
Couldn't miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas; Merry Christmas
Couldn't miss this one this year.

~ The Waitresses


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The Waitresses was an interesting band.
I think i have "I Know What Boys Like" on 45.

You felt sad finding out that it wasn't a girl written song, but, there are actually very few girl written songs. Almost everything on the radio today is written by two guys. Further, women do not like to talk/sing about women's real feelings/thought processes. They would rather keep all the guys guessing.

I used to like "Christmas Wrapping". I liked the idea of a christmas ending. But today it just sounds flat.

Merry bah humbug to all.

Well, Prince writing "Nothing compares to you." or the other songs are pretty unisex. "Me and Bobby McGee" is interesting, to have been sung both ways, but I prefer hearing Janice sing it.

"I Know What Boys Like" is a fairly simple song and if you know that a guy wrote it, it actually can be seen from his perspective of girls just teasing him.

Also "I drove all night" sung by Cyndi Lauper compared to its writer/singer... old country singer (big name, can't remember) very different songs, with the same lyrics.

I understand that difference, but i was trying to relay that women think very different from men.

Barbra Streisand - A Woman In Love
is a woman's love song sung by a woman.

Or, in other words, the standard logic is that
women are the romantic ones and men are the practical ones,
when in fact, it is the opposite that is true.

Men fall in love and start waxing poetic and writing limericks.

Hello @deanlogic, thank you for sharing this creative work! We just stopped by to say that you've been upvoted by the @creativecrypto magazine. The Creative Crypto is all about art on the blockchain and learning from creatives like you. Looking forward to crossing paths again soon. Steem on!

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