What is a Family?

in #story6 years ago (edited)

Paradise Lost Chapter II



The heaviest topic to write was always about family. I never understood what is a family? is it the one based on society standard?or am I allowed to create my own?

It said that family is a group of people related by blood living seemingly happy and harmonious under one roof. What if the one that I have don't fit that definition?

And so,I was constantly left with open-ended questions.



Two months earlier, I met my biological mother.If there was any word softer than hate, I would rather use it to express my intense dislike towards her. But, if I despised her that much, would not it meant to refuse my existence?I simply never knew how to react.

I tried my best to be the perfect daughter. The one that she might wanted. The one that she might love and the one she might be proud of. I did the best I could with resources I had. I accomplished things that would make other parents wished they would had me instead. My own mother passed stories about me as if she knew everything. Yet I was the trophy child whom she could show and tell to her eminent friends. I was nothing more than a trophy she would not forget to dust whenever convenient.

Meeting her was disastrous. It supposed to be a typical Christmas family celebration but I ended up finishing extra works she had. I spent the night looking at the laptop screen, piles of papers while my brother's cat occasionally jumped into my laptop's keyboard. He wouldn't leave me alone. Though somehow I felt happy, I got a genuine companion. Despite my mother's treatment, I respected and was proud of her achievements as an individual. Her groundbreaking ideas were able to help women in the rural area to be empowered. She had an empathy for underprivileged children and women but not her own.

So that day, just like my regular routine, I sat in my favorite corner while waiting for my moccha. Then, a couple minutes later, the barista delivered my croissant and coffee to my table.He had a posh hairstyle with a friendly cute smile.He often tried to make a conversation but seemed to hold his question.

I gave the moccha a few sip. It was too bitter for my liking.They barely got the composition right.Sometimes it's too bitter, sometimes the chocolate dominated the taste.Only a couple occasions they got it right.

My eyes were screening through the train ticket that would take me home.Honestly, I had no strong desire to go back except I wanted to forget. I wanted to ease the pain I felt. I hoped my adoptive parents would welcome me with their warmest embrace. Yes. I simply craved a warmest hug from people who loved me.

I wanted to wash away the sadness and pain after meeting my biological family. I was displeased and hurt, knowing the weren't the people I wanted to be with. Somehow, I finally understood that I was adopted for the better.

"But hey, why do I grow resentment towards my adoptive parents?" I asked Anne one time while sipping my coffee

Anne did not actually know the whole story neither did I. It was always as twisted as a ball of yarn. I never knew which side to believe and I decided to let it slide. Perhaps by time, I would uncover the truth.

Life felt burdensome that month, especially the valentine was approaching. I was supposed to be traveling and meeting the love of my life. Yet it turned to dust. I was on my own. And the only thing that comforted me was the ticket back home.

I wanted to forget. I really wanted to forget.



Footnotes :



Disclaimer
The information provided is part of my personal interest. If you have any objection, ideas or constructive criticism, do not hesitate to leave a comment. Any form of feedbacks are appreciated.I will get back to you as soon as possible.

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Haha I read this like 2 days ago, but wanted to give it a proper read so didn't write anywhing and didnt like....u have balls to share such personal stuff here, I still can't believe u r doing it....with ur mother..why did she leave you, can I know? Our family aint perfect at all either, my parents had a NAAASTY divorce with police and all the stuff included...tho im kinda grateful for it as my psyche got super strong to withstand it...but making mum's papers on Christmas would probably kill me as well :) I love how you always give a proper importance to describe the drinks u'r sipping haha :D What does home mean? Back to ur University town or?

I'm kinda puzzled srry, I have to read ur blogs more consistent...

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