A CHURCH GIRL'S TALE (Episode 10)

I didn’t attend choir practice on Saturday nor church service on Sunday because I didn’t want to see Mrs Williams. I had made up my mind not to tell her anything and I knew she would ask me if she set her eyes on me.
I didn’t know I was only adding more petrol to a burning fire.

Some choir members came again after service to check on me, thinking I haven’t recovered fully or not strong enough toattend service. Of course, when I saw them, I pretended to be weak still.

Bode came later in the evening when everybody had left. He said “I knew you didn’t come to church today because of me, not because of your health. You refuse to forgive me despite my plead. I told you it was the work of the devil, please let’s be doing as we used to do before..please now”. He began to weep. I was moved with passion when I saw him weeping. I went to him, gave him a gentle pat on the back, and said “That’s okay. Stop crying. It wasn’t only your fault, but mine too. We
both need to ask God for forgiveness and to make sure it doesn’t happen again….”

Before I could finish my sentence, he got up, held me close and began to kiss me. Every attempt to rescue myself out of his hand failed. At a time, I surrendered, and again,…it happened!. This time, we were both deeply involved in the act than before. Oh Sewa, I have tasted the forbidden fruit, and here am I, sliding deeper and deeper into this evil act. Before I could put myself together, Bode dressed up and ran out of my room.

I started weeping. “Lord, I’ve done it again. I disobeyed again” For days, I was praying and weeping, asking God for forgiveness and for what to do, I didn’t hear anything as I heard it earlier. More so, I was so fearful of pregnancy because I was in a period of my ladies cycle where I believed pregnancy can develop. But then, I was so naive of any preventive measures. What can I do, and who can I open up to. I can't imagine myself, a holy Mary, asking my fellow corpers of a preventive measure.

It was so obvious that something was wrong
with me, as I was a shadow of myself. Even my dressing changed, a 60 year old woman would dress better.
Everybody was asking, “What’s wrong with you? Hope there’s no problem. Are you still sick?”. My usual answer was “No problem, all is well”..but within me, I knew nothing was well. I wasn’t attending mid-week services also. I would prefer to be in my room, and be thinking. The thought that bothered me most was “Will God ever forgive me?
If the first one was a mistake, what about this one?”.
Mrs Williams called me one Wednesday evening after having prayer meeting in church. “Sis Sewa, I noticed you were not in church today for the prayer meeting, how are you?. Are you not okay yet?”. “I’m fine ma”.
“Then, why have you been keeping yourself away from church?”.
“Nothing ma.”
“You’ve started again. Oh!. That reminds me, you promised to tell me something the other day, will you come and see me tomorrow after school?. I will be waiting for you at the church office.”
“What time ma?”
“Let’s make it 4pm”.
“Ok ma”.
She hung up.

My heart began to beat very fast. I could hear the sound.
What will I say?. Maybe I should just cook up a
story. But, what if she knew it’s all lies. Oh my God!. What mess have I gotten myself into?. How will I get out of this now?.

As I was pondering over this, my phone rang.
It was my dad. I picked it.
What did he say?.

##Watch out for Episode 11.