Sobriety- why saying sorry is important

So this weekend, substance abuse was on my mind a lot. I don't know why but I ended up watching a reaction video to Demi Lovato's song sober.

For those of you who don't keep up to date with Hollywood gossip (I am one of those people) just after releasing this song, Demi who previously had substance abuse problems and who had been sober for a really long time, OD'd. This bit of information will be relevant later. She is doing good and has been sober for a couple of months now and honestly listening to her song gave me some perspective into the mind of people with this kind of struggle.

I'm going to share a personal experience but I don't want to use names in order to protect everyone involved.

So I know someone who is currently struggling with substance abuse and he doesn't understand that what he is doing is also effecting everyone he loves, infact right now hê doesn't care. Speaking to his family members, they have shared with me while in tears that sometimes they wished he would just die because then they would know where he is, they would be safe from the dangerous people that he is bringing into their lives. They would know that his family is safe from him.

That is something no one would ever want to say about somebody they love and yet because of his choices, they end up living in fear for his life as well as their own. His sister told me that every day she lives in fear that the next call she gets will be the one that tells her, her brother is dead.

Having lived with that fear before (not the same circumstance but also fearing the next call would be the bad news call) I can honestly say that it is stressful and probably one of the worst emotional feelings in the world.

That is why I think people going through sobriety need to apologize and make amends where they can. It is important for anyone who isn't sober to realise that what they choose effects everyone and only by accepting responsibility and healing wounds that they have created in family and friends can they fully start to heal themselves. It is a lot easier to say sorry to someone else than it is to say sorry to yourself.

I just wanted to put that out there. Some of these teenagers said that she doesn't have to be sorry. And in some way they are correct but if you hurt someone even if it was indirectly. You need to apologize.

I hope if any of you are going through sobriety, That you will remember those who love you when the temptation hits. You don't only hurt yourself when you use.

Xoxo
@thegoldencookie