Terms & Conditions for The Boring Company's Flamethrower

in #technology6 years ago (edited)

The Boring Company's Flamethrower

Terms & Conditions

Three months ago, Elon Musk and The Boring Company sold 20,000 Flamethrowers in only 4 days. The fire shooting devices were set to ship in Spring. There has been a lot of anticipation and doubt surrounding the devices after a great push-back from authorities. The Boring Company has been calling the device 'Not-a-Flamethrower'. A few weeks ago, The Boring Company sent out the following message regarding upcoming Terms & Conditions:

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The Terms & Conditions Arrive

Yesterday, the following email was sent out to those who placed an order for The Boring Company's flamethrower. Buyers will need to complete a form by May 24th in order to receive their device:

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A Look at the Terms & Conditions

Since I felt obligated to purchase a flamethrower, I must go through the Terms & Conditions. Below is a step-by-step walk-thru of the The Boring Company's Flamethrower's Terms & Conditions. As you can see from the first page, many boxes will be clicked along the way.

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The Rhymes Ensue

They weren't kidding when they said they were handing out rhyming Terms & Conditions...

I will not use this in a house
I will not point this at my spouse
I will not use this in an unsafe way
The best use is Crème brûlée…

I can agree to that...

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The Rhymes End...

The next page gets a bit more serious. Buyers must acknowledge that The Boring Company is not responsible for the following, regardless of how genius or stupid it may be:

Harming Others
Setting Things On Fire
Burning Things to the Ground
Smoking Near the Not-a-Flamethrower
Putting Anything Flammable Near the Not-a-Flamethrower
Showing Off to Friends or Romantic Interests

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No Using Faulty Flamethrowers...

The next acknowledgement the buyer must make, is the flamethrower must not be used if it is damaged. Hopefully the buyer is able to tell if the flamethrower is broken before they go shooting faulty flames...

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Lost Flamethrowers...

The buyer must also acknowledge that the Boring Company is not responsible for any lost flamethrowers. If a flamethrower gets lost during shipment or if a crazy event occurs that will prevent you from receiving the flamethrower, you're going to have to deal with it.

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No Reselling/Returning/Exchanging

You are not allowed to resell, return, or exchange The Boring Company's Flamethrower if you are not happy with it.

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The last page was a lengthy typical Terms & Conditions page with small words (too long to screen-shot). After completing the form a 'Thank You' appears on the screen, but there is no mention of possible ship-dates. I assume they will not begin shipping until after the May 24th Terms & Conditions deadline. Many fun @dlive and @dtube videos to come!

The Boring Company's Flamethrower - Terms & Conditions:

https://www.boringcompany.com/terms

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Thanks For Reading!

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