Ayahuasca: A spiritual Awakening

What is ayahuasca?
Ayahuasca is a combination of leaves from Psychotria Virdis and the vines of Banisteriopsis Caapi. These plants only grow in the Amazonian rainforest and have been used by shamans for thousands of years as a means to connect to the spirit world. It is used to heal the mind, body, and spirit. The leaves contain something known as DMT or Dimethyltryptamine, a chemical produced during REM sleep to allow you to experience dreams. Many things that we eat contain DMT, but our stomach’s enzymes naturally break down this chemical before it can enter our bloodstream. That’s where the vine comes in. The vines inhibit your enzymes ability to function properly and it allows the DMT to travel into your bloodstream and into your brain. Basically, opens the doors to some serious dreamlike hallucinations and it decalcifies the pineal gland. Now everyone is different and the hallucinations are much different than that of LSD or mushrooms. LSD and mushrooms are more about having a righteous trip and enjoying the party, but ayahuasca is more about reconciling with one’s emotions, traumatic experiences, etc. It’s a very deep and reflective medicine that will leave you feeling at ease and peace with your thoughts. I would describe it as a deeply meditative state and universal acceptance of the now.

My Spiritual Awakening
After learning about the ceremony, Martin Meza sent me a ten-page instruction manual on everything I needed to do to prepare for my journey. Over the next forty-eight hours I couldn’t drink alcohol, smoke, have sex, eat meat, or any other thing besides water. This was to cleanse my body, soul, and mind. It’s an interesting thing to fast. After the glucose your brain runs on is depleted, you get a rockin headache, and lose all of your energy. Well, good thing I work at a front desk I guess, cause I don’t have to move too often. I found that I meditation and focus on the goal made not eating easier. With each glass of water, I was closer to the ceremony, closer to clarity. I needed clarity for my journey and I wanted to let go of my fear and insecurity. I wanted some type of sign that this trip is what I was meant to do, that I was making the right decision.

Saturday, June 30th at 6:00pm, I walked up to the AutoZone to see a bunch of people in suits and ballroom dresses. There must have been sixty people in the parking lot just looking snazzy. My first thought was, “Oh man, I’m way underdressed for this ceremony”, but then my better judgment came around and I realized that they just have some big balls here in Cabo San Lucas. After passing through all the ball goers, I see a dude sitting on the stairs just grinning from ear to ear, he looked at me and said in a thick accent: “Are you here for the ayahuasca?” I just chuckled, nodded, and knew Ruben and I would become great friends. He explained his reasoning was because lately during his meditations he had been seeing sacred geometry and wanted to know what it meant. We laughed about how damn hungry we were and expressed how this better be worth it if we were giving up food. The first lesson we had to learn was all great things take patience. We waited for about fifty minutes before anyone showed up to pick us up, and even when they did, they didn’t have a bus for us. They had one singular white sedan for the fourteen people that were there, but luckily a good amount people had driven, so Ruben and I just hitched a ride with a guy from Scottland.

About 83km north of Cabo San Lucas we arrived at a private beach with about five white bungalows. Once we set up our sleeping bags and greeted one another we were instructed to go get firewood. Honestly, this was a trial of sheer will when you haven’t eaten in two days. Hauling logs through the sand kicked my ass, but the setting sun was giving me plenty of encouragement to carry on and keep my mental fortitude. Once all the logs were gathered we came together to gather around the Temazcal. This is a sweat lodge and it is explained that your skin becomes a second liver to help you detoxify your body of bad energy, toxins, and anything else you may have that you’re holding onto. In the center of the Temazcal was a hole and a bucket filled with water, lemongrass, and herbs I don’t remember, but it smelled amazing. After each burning stone is placed in the center you have to shout “AHOE” which is kinda funny, but it’s taken seriously since they are the words of the ancestors. Forty-five minutes later, I was sufficiently drenched in sweat, and ready for the next step… or so I thought.

If I had one regret during this entire ceremony, it was partaking in the tobacco and spice nose shotgun. It’s exactly what it sounds like, sorry I can’t remember the name. But basically you surrender your nostrils to a shaman with a straw and he blows really strong tobacco, mixed with mint, and a bunch of other strong herbs right into your brain. Hot damn. That shit burns, your eyes start to water, and the feeling you get is like when your way to drunk and you feel like your spinning out of control. I began to stumble around discombobulated and all out of sorts. They gave me some water and told me to go lay in the sand and stop fighting it. It was great advice, but I still didn’t like it. I tried to bring myself into the meditative state, focus on my breathing, and try to get ready for the final step, ayahuasca.

My head still spinning, we gather around the fire in a big group and begin to discuss what was about to happen. Just to paint an accurate picture, this was all in Spanish. We were all are encouraged to think of our purpose for being there, to heal, to grow, and to become more conscious. Our shaman explained that the only person capable of healing you is you. You are the one who imposes insecurities, fear, sorrow, upon yourself. It was a lot to take in, but I understood the general idea. Keeping these thoughts in mind, we all greeted each other and wished one another luck on their spiritual journey. We were told that some will have a very intense experience and some may scream or cry, but we were told each path is their own, and it’s journey they must walk alone. They began to burn sacred herbs and used roadrunner feathers to waft the smoke over us and rid us of external negative energies. At this point I’m making my peace, taking deep breathes, and I decided to let it take me where it was going to take me.

The time came, I was given a little bucket, a napkin, and a shot of ayahuasca. The taste is like a tangy gritty dirt flavor, and I would suggest swallowing it as fast as possible. We were told to go lay down and enter a deep meditative state, and let the ayahuasca guide you. After laying in the fetal position for about an hour, nothing was happening and we were told that it may differ from person to person on how much you would need. I went up for seconds, gaged slightly, swallowed it back down, and made my way back to my sleeping bag on the beach. Another thirty minutes passed by and I turned to look at the stars and beyond the faint clouds I saw incredible geometric figures in a tint of green, but only for about three seconds. Feeling restless I got up to go to the bathroom, oh, by the way, your body is going to purge itself one of two ways no matter what. But luckily I read the instructions and I hadn’t eaten for two days, so I really only had one option. Well, then it happened, the first vomiting session. Ruben walked up to me mid vomit and asked how I was doing. Remarkably, ayahuasca coming back up actually tastes pretty damn good. It pulls all the negative energy and feelings out with it and as you continue you feel better and better. Still believing this is a fun hallucinogenic, I went up for another dose to try and see the universe astral travel like the description you hear about from popular media. So, again I went to lay down in the fetal position, except this time I went and stopped trying to see with my eyes, I turned it all off. I began to feel, I let my emotions free. I let the fear, anxiety, worry, regret, doubt, negativity, anger, sexual dependency and sadness churn in my stomach, I began to realize what this was all about. All these things are not real, but they are projections of the mind and they attach to the soul on our own doing. We attract these things with our energy, and we are the ones who bring negativity into our lives. Then came the magic, I realized that I can make the choice to release all of these things, I am the only one who can forgive myself, and the second I decided to do so I dug a hole in the sand and… BLAAAAAAGNAAAAA. A new black tar throw up much different from the first vomit left my mouth and a new feeling came over me. Oneness with the universe, with God, with all living things. I understood that I could channel into all those who were awake and aware of this infinitive truth.

As I laid on my back the moon breathed, the ocean sang, the flames dance, and the earth held me. A new peace and understanding of life and death came over me. Death is not the end, but a doorway, one we shouldn’t fear. I died that day, but it was the death of my ego, and I was reborn. My purpose became clear. Why I named my blog the travelteer in the first place. I am the travelteer. My purpose in life is to help others, to show that you that there is another way, one without greed, fear, and hate. A path of love and understanding for one another. I leave on this journey to help my neighbor, understand them, spread peace, and in walking this path I know I have the support of the universe, my creator, and most importantly myself. As I follow this path I know that all things I need will be provided for me. I see that fear, worry, and doubt is that of human creation and ignorance. The spiritual light that shines from within makes all things possible when we are aware of its presence, and thus we allow ourselves to steer and create our own destiny. We manifest our own realities, both good and bad.

After the ceremony, I took my first bite of food in fifty hours. Wow, I’ve never been so appreciative of a peanut bar. I went to sleep for the next four hours and when I woke up Ruben and I realized our ride had left. Never the less, we had a new found ability. Trust and faith in the universe. We grabbed our backpacks and set out to the road to begin the walk back to Cabo San Lucas, the 83km walk. Well, we didn’t grab any water so… we put a thumb out. After about twenty cars, a little blue car flipped on his flashers and pulled on over for us. His nickname was “Tiburón” aka “Shark” as mine is “Cazador”. He said he pulled over because of the radio was playing a song called the travelers of ayahuasca, and our energy was full of life and peace. We shared our story, he shared his water, we made some jokes, and talked about our journey. He took us the full 83km into Cabo San Lucas, but the city isn’t exactly small. So he dropped us off at the bus stop, we hopped on the bus and it took us straight into town. Ruben got off three stops later, and I got off at the pier. I ended up walking two blocks back to the Baja Cactus Hostel. My journey will be a success, and I know this with a spiritual certainty. I’m excited to share my journey. Thank you for joining me, and hopefully, I can inspire some of you who hold fear as a reason for stopping you.

Next stop, San Diego! Time to pack my bags! I’ve got some Travelteering to do!