Not Everyone Would Like You. II, Contributed by @Olawalium
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When a man is in love, and a lady rejects him, it shatters his ego. This is why sometimes they feel it is not appropriate for a lady to ask a man out. I don’t find it odd. In fact, I would love it hahaha. I think this is because ladies are too emotional, so it shatters their sense of worth of the guy turns them down.
Back in line. When we love someone and we don’t get it back, we feel the need to start fixing what is not broken. We start filling our head with a load of questions about Am I not good enough? Could it be because I don’t have money? or What was he or she expecting? and we start going all out to impress someone who has given an honest response in the first place. We try to pressure the person, so he or she can give in and when they eventually do, we wonder why it didn’t work out. The same thing is applicable in friendship.
Rather than sell yourself short because you are looking for acceptance, rather be who you are and seek to evolve. The bottom line is, not everyone would like or love you. If everyone loves you, you need to be more careful even because maybe someone is giving a false value. Life is like that. The truth is, you don’t like or love everyone either, and it is not because you have something against such person. You just don’t “flow” with that person and rather than mess things up, all you do is just greet them, go your way.
Not everyone will like or love you, so stop living your life trying to impress people.
People’s negative thoughts about you shouldn’t determine how you live your life, especially when you know you have done nothing wrong and you have peace with it.
There is no higher court than the court of conscience.
A friend of mine can’t help but beat herself up because she felt she isn’t good enough. She feels she might never find another guy as this who will tolerate her. She feels everything is her fault. People sometimes want us to live at their mercy. They want to control how we feel and how we think. Like I always tell people around me, always do what you feel is best for you. If you make a mistake, learn from it, if you make a headway, rejoice and trust your instincts more and aim higher. However, living your life in sadness because someone left or because someone did or didn’t do something, now that is a dangerous path to tread on.
Final word: Not everyone would like you, and it has nothing to do with what you have done or didn’t do, most of the times. It is always a personal decision and you have to learn to accept things you cannot control. You can’t control how people feel about you, you can’t control what people think about you, even if you decided to do things with the best of intentions. Stop seeking approvals. Don’t beat yourself up for it and don’t hate them also for it. Everyone would always want to do what’s best for them. Do what’s best for you, by feeling good about who you are.
Thank you for your time.
My pen doesn’t bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.
Still me,
My tongue is like the pen of a ready writer.
Olawalium; (Love’s chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor’s order.
The desire to be love by people is really imperative, but we really have to understand that you cannot be love by all man no matter how hard will try to make things right , the only thing I know and I will like to contribute is that we should always do somethings that our heart will sanctified as palatable often, with that we shouldn't be more bother since there is no way to please everybody ( that we haven't done anything wrong)
You are right on this man, is it nature of man to always be turned down and at the same time to be embraced, but a lady is so emotional that if they get heartbreak or turned down it might be too hard on them to cope. I believe men heart is very rigid while of a lady seems to be flexible. Maybe that is why it is often hard on them to propose to man, afraid not to be turned down
I guess you have had the same experience with lady brother, it is always like that, we tend to ask different question why and how we got turn down most especially from the woman and we try to do please such lady to tell us what actually went wrong to deserve that.
This does really matter. Getting oneself upgraded to a higher level could be of great important and the fact that the lady might even find that person interesting can't be over emphasize. Like is not always fair like that because people will love often don't get to love us back or hurt us to most. Remember love is not always that equals, there will be someone who is actually more addicted.
How others judge us, may be exactly as we judge ourselves. When we still can not accept ourselves as we are, others can not accept us for what they are. Others will make unfair comparisons of us. But above all we have to accept that judgment gracefully. That way, then changed how to assess ourselves.
After we do good things for ourselves by doing the best we can do, then let others with their minds.
If we still find other people who always think of us as "different" or rude, nothing special, leave it alone! Everyone has the right to judge by his own assumptions and thoughts. Try to think positive and keep doing self-correction. Because, who knows, even though we believe we have done many good things in our lives, one time we forget the study of mistakes that affect others. Forget about what they think. Close the ears! Do not let others expect too much of what we can give. Do not make a loss for yourself Because of their narrow mind. We've done our best yet, have not we?
And most importantly our pain should not be compensated by hurting others, if we do just as we are with them. For that before we are convinced that we have done the best for ourselves and others. See the positive side of people's view of us. The ones who know best about ourselves are ourselves, then why do we think of what others want of us?.
I could remember a lady crying because I said no back then in Lagos. My cousins in Lagos still make jest of the incident up till today. It was strange to me due to what I had been told that it is not proper for a lady to approach a guy. I said no without thinking about it and she started crying like a baby. If she still have the confidence to approach me again today, I think my answer would be different, even if I would still say no, it would be polite, not that I would see her as a sinner who has no dignity... Lol
If we are living our lives based on what people are saying or are thinking about us, we are just merely existing and not living. The true value of life is discovered when you do what you want to do and still enjoy yourself doing them.
Let anybody that love you love you for who you are and not who they want you to be. You can't be living in your body as a stranger to yourself and still enjoy the true beauty of originality.
If they find it difficult to love the real you, they won't still appreciate who you are changing to in order to please them, why then troubling yourself?
Thank you @olawalium and @communitycoin, I know it would always be getting better.
Hahahahaha i really feel for that lady. Yes, she was courageous and i admire ladies like that.
You are right, they won't still appreciate the changed version because they will constantly want to change us. Thanks a lot as always. Always insightful. Well done bro.
Thank you bro...
Why even changing for someone who won't change an inch for you... Lol
Hahahahahaha exactly.
Love is a life. Good luck with anyone. But in the present age, we understand the young man-young girl. Almost all men are weak on the girl. If one person is tired over another. young boy first propose a girl first but most boys do not accept love. As a result, mentality was damaged among boys. Many people choose not to tolerate suicide. Still, I will say that love is PBA. Because we do not love, we all know that Tronagari has fought repeatedly. So love is unimaginable
The people who want to impress others are those who do not know themselves. If you truly knew yourself, if you truly knew who you are at your core, you will now that what you truly want in life cannot be found in other people.
If we take a closer look at what makes somebody want to impress others, you will discover that what drives this need to impress is an unhealthy or perhaps an unhelpful belief that one has about oneself. I know, because I have been there. In my late teens and early twenties, I felt the need to impress. I looked within for answers, and that is where I found the truth. I wanted to impress because I wanted to prove to myself that I was special, and this was driven by a belief that I was not good enough. I grew out of that belief (thank goodness) and into newer, healthier ones.
If you find yourself constantly trying to impress others, you need to look within yourself to find what belief you have that is driving this desire to impress.
Very good. Well said. You know, as humans, we love hearing good things being said about us and for someone whose life depends on always hearing good stuffs, they tend to take to heart too much, if anything negative was said. They forget who they are and be who people think they are. Once we know who we are, accolades would be a bonus, and negatives would be for strength. It is not easy, but never impossible. It was a long journey for me to get there too, and i am glad i did.
Thanks a lot for this.
I would quite frankly be creeped out if everyone did like me. Am quite comfortable being hated or disliked by a handful of people.
Absolutely. Something is fishy if everyone seem to like you. That is what makes life interesting and what really shapes us. The dislike and hate is needed. How else can we redefine how we want to be loved?. Thanks a lot dear.
Effective thought about love and pain.. I believe that a pain stabbed our heart, as it did every time I saw a girl .We loved who was going the opposite direction in this too-big world.
Yes, some things are just beyond our control, but the one within our control; self love, we should strive to exercise it.
Thanks a lot for this.
Right thought..@olawalium
It's a beautiful story. You are an awesome writer. Thanks, @communitycoin
Thanks. Much appreciated.
Welcome
Yeah, in the end, not all would like you, support you, help you, train you, everybody liking you is a bad thing on it's own too. We would feel so comfortable thinking that all that we do is right and has no fault.
Nice work to the composer of this great text
Thanks a lot. Duly appreciated.